The Stars Above Us

Chapter 9

Chapter 9

"Credit for your thoughts, Jimmy."

She scoffed, "I doubt they're worth that much."

"I think they are. You okay?" Bones asked as he sat next to her on the pier. Her dad thought it was a good idea to spend some time at the cabin in Mojave near the lake. So, that's where Jim, Bones, Chris and Charlie were.

"Nope," she muttered as she looked out at the water. Her nightmares took on a whole new level of horror since Tarsus and Jim was lucky to get an hour or two of sleep. She was sure it didn't go unnoticed, especially by her best friend. "You're not even remotely surprised."

"No, I'm not. So, you wanna talk about it?" he asked. Jim shook her head.

"Nothing to talk about," Jim sighed.

"That's a lie otherwise you wouldn't be sitting outside at almost three in the morning by yourself."

"You're here so I'm not by myself," she pointed out.

"You know what I mean, smartass," Bones grumbled. "Something's bothering you and it goes beyond what…"

"I killed someone," Jim whispered. "An enforcer. I stabbed him in the neck."

"Why?" he asked. She expected shock and even disgust but he just asked her like they were talking about the weather.

"He tried to strangle me when I stole food." Jim could still feel his hand around her neck, still see the look in his eyes.

"And you feel bad about it," Bones said.

"I'm a murderer," she whispered.

"No, you're not. You defended yourself. I know that doesn't change the fact that you took a life but you have to know that it was either gonna be him or you," he sighed. Jim nodded. She knew that, even if it didn't make her feel better. "You're not the asshole here, Jim. That's Kodos and his followers. You're the girl who saved a whole bunch of little kids from being killed."

"Didn't matter in the end. Some of them died and I can't even see the others."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean," Jim sighed, "that their families don't want me to have any contact with them. I wasn't given any information on anyone. Not Tommy, not Kevin, not Elena... None of them. Dad tried but his CO is a prick." That was actually the hardest part. Five weeks she protected those kids and made sure they didn't starve to death and now she couldn't even comm them to make sure they were okay. Kevin and Tommy were actually her friends, so that just hurt. "They want them to forget. Like surviving the m******e of your family is something you can forget."

"They just want to do what they think is right," He said.

"You think it's right to keep us all apart?"

"I didn't say that. I honestly think it's stupid to break ya'll up. I know you're worried about the others, I don't doubt they're worried about you too," Bones told her. "Hell, I'm sitting next to you and I'm worried."

"I know. I wish I could be okay again. You being nice to me all the time is weird. And watching dad and pop walk on eggshells whenever I'm in the room… It's like they're waiting for me to break."

"They're just worried, Jim. You've been through a lot and you're only thirteen. Doesn't help that your dad… he blames himself. You wouldn't have been there if it wasn't for him taking those orders," he said.

"What? He didn't have a choice, they're called orders for a reason. This isn't his fault." Her dad has his own issues to deal with. The Aldrin was heavily damaged during an engagement with a Vestian ship and her dad had to temporarily take command of the ship from Captain Kanmach. Now, he was facing a court martial for mutiny.

"Isn't yours either. You just got caught in the middle of some megalomaniac's bid for more power," Bones asserted.

"Wow. Megalomaniac? Someone's been hitting the books," she teased.

"I was bored without you and I can admit it," he smiled. "Seriously, you have nothing to feel guilty for. I doubt I would've been able to do half of what you did, Jim."

"Oh, please. You're tougher than me."

"Doubt it," Bones sighed. "I'm just me. You… You're the superhero."

"That makes you the sidekick, Bonesy," Jim pointed out.

"That's okay, I can still hang out in the batcave," he chuckled.

"Stark tower," she countered.

"Baxter Building."

"I see your Baxter Building, Bones and I raise you the TARDIS."

"The X-mansion."

Jim smiled, "Justice League Satellite."

"The Fortress of Solitude," they said in unison.

"Just somewhere safe," Jim whispered. "Somewhere where I can close my eyes and relax."

"Works for me," he smiled. "We better go back inside. It's chilly out here and we both need to sleep."

"Go ahead. I can't exactly sleep," she muttered.

"You don't feel safe, do you?" Bones asked. She shrugged. "How about we both sleep in the living room? Grab your pillows and blankets, I'll grab mine and we crash on the couches. I'll even... keep watch for a little while. That's the right term, right?"

Jim looked at him, "Keep watch? Yea, it's the right term... You're serious, aren't you?"

"Yep. Come on." He offered her his hand. Jim let Bones pull her to her feet.

"You're a good friend, Bones."

"I know."

"Wait… What are you saying about Ole Miss?"

"That's where I'm gonna go to college," Bones told her. "If they'll take me."

"And here I thought you were gonna go to Starfleet with me," she gave him a nudge.

"I told you I wasn't," he said. "You could always come with me."

"Why would I do that? I could just apply to the Academy," Jim said. She looked at her best friend like he was crazy.

"Actually, the University of Mississippi has a Fleet ROTC program," her dad said as he poured himself a cup of coffee. "You could both go undergrad and grad before joining Starfleet. You'd get a semi-normal college experience, a chance to grow up a little more and since you're my kid and George Kirk's kid, it might be the better option for you than jumping right into Starfleet."

"See, Bones, we can both go," she told him. "I'll go to Ole Miss and you join ROTC with me."

"That means I'd have to serve in Starfleet. Thanks but no thanks," he said.

"Pretty please," Jim gave him the puppy dog face. "Come on, you know you want to."

"You aren't gonna let this go, are you?" Bones asked.

"Probably not," she sighed. "Look, we're geniuses, we're gonna fly through school anyway. Hell, I was already working on college credits with Hos… with Hoshi before everything." Jim took a deep breath. Bones, her dad and Grandpa Charlie all looked at her. "Starfleet saved my life, Bones. You're gonna be an amazing doctor one day and the next kid who gets rescued by Starfleet is gonna need a good doctor. Just saying."

"I'll think about it," he said. Jim gave him a big smile. "That's not a yes."

"Yes it is."

Chapter 10

"Come on, Jim," Bones said. At least, that's what she thought he said as he pulled her arm over his shoulder and wrapped an arm around her waist.

"I don't think she wants to go with you, man," someone told her friend, trying to tug her away. On instinct, Jim leaned more into Bones' side.

"She can b***h at me later. When she's sober," Bones growled. Jim giggled.

"Your voice is deeper. I just noticed that," she mumbled. "It's pretty hot."

"Yea, well you're drunk so shut up." Even though he was mad at her, she could hear the smile in his voice.

"I had a few but I'm not drunk, Bonesy," Jim chuckled.

"Yea, and I'm a purple pony," he grumbled. That conjured up a vision of her best friend with hooves and a purple mane. Jim couldn't help but laugh. "You idiots realize that's she's fourteen, right?"

"Yea, right. You're lying," someone else said.

"He's not lying. Genius..." she pointed at herself then at Bones, "other genius. Child prodigies. Badasses. Superheroes."

"Yea, yea. Let's go, Wonder Woman," Bones said as he pulled her out of the frat house. "You're lucky I love ya, kid."

"Kid? We're almost the same age," Jim said as they walked down the street.

"Why don't you act like it?" he asked.

"I'm fourteen, I'm supposed to do stupid s**t. Considering where I was this time last year… this is nothing."

"s**t. The anniversary is this month. I forgot… sorta," Bones mumbled.

"It's okay. I don't want to remember either," she muttered.

"Is that what that was? You were trying to forget?" he asked.

"Maybe a little. I just wanted to have some fun," Jim said. "All I do is study and ROTC stuff. I just wanted one night where I was remotely normal."

"No such thing as normal, Jimmy," Bones said.

"Easy for you to say, you're more normal than me."

"I don't know about that. I'm flying through school just as fast as you are," he said.

"You know what I mean, Bones. You have friends and stuff," she mumbled.

"They're not really my friends. Just classmates," Bones told her. "You're my friend."

"What about Pamela?" Jim sing-songed. Pamela Branch was a seventeen year old freshmen who caught her friend's eye.

"We're not quite friends," he said.

"Oh, I know. She told me all about it."

"All about what? We were partnered up in advanced biology, that's it."

"Uh huh," Jim snorted.

"What?" Bones stopped walking and turned to face her. "What am I missing, Jim?"

"She told me to stay away from you. Said I was just a weird little girl clinging to you because you're too nice to tell me to get lost," she told him.

"She said that? Jim, I never…"

"I know you never said that. You're not that nice. It's just… thinking about it... What if she's right? Ole Miss was your dream and I just invited myself to tag along. I get the logic in going to a normal college but maybe I should've just stayed in San Fran. Went to UC Berkeley or something."

"You listen to me and you listen good. Yes, Ole Miss was always my dream. This is where my father went to school. Starfleet is your dream. It's where your parents made their lives and why we're both in ROTC. We blended our dreams together and it works for us. Let me make one thing very clear, I like having you here. Hell, I'm the person that suggested you come to Ole Miss with me. The last time we were apart you almost died, it was the scariest five weeks of my life. You're not weird or clingy, and even if you were I wouldn't care because you're my friend and I love you," he said. "I don't know what her deal is but I'll handle Pamela."

"You'll handle Pamela?"

"She upset my best friend, it's on now."

"My hero. What would I do without you, Bonesy?" she chuckled as they started walking again.

"Uh… wake up in a frat house without your virginity and no memory of how it happened," he said.

"Probably," Jim admitted. "Not the best move in the universe."

"No kidding. You gotta stop beating yourself up, Jim," he told her. "And the next time you want to let loose, tell me beforehand so I can go with you. You're lucky that at least one of those guys isn't a total jerk and comm'ed me."

"Okay," she sighed. "Hey, Bonesy?"

"Yea?"

"I love you too," Jim whispered.

"I know."

"Are you ready?" someone in The Grove yelled.

At once, everyone near the guy, including Jim and Bones yelled back. "Hell Yes! Damn Right!" Then the chant started, "Hotty Toddy, Gosh almighty. Who the hell are we? Hey! Flim Flam, Bim Bam. Ole Miss, by damn!"

Jim loves American football. Because it's football.

It was just one of those things that she watched with her dad when he had the time. They'd get snacks, watch the game and he'd tell her about being the captain of his team in high school or stories about her father falling on his ass in the middle of a game to make her mother laugh. Now, she was hanging out before a Rebels football game with Bones and some of the other midshipmen from their ROTC platoon. They were at the game to cheer on their Platoon Commander, Alexa Batista, who plays on the team.

"Who do you think will be the new platoon commander is gonna be when Lexie graduates?" Davison asked her.

"Kirk," McGraw said from behind Jim and Bones.

"It's not gonna be me," Jim shook her head. "Unit Commander thinks I'm too young."

"Youngest Starfleet officer on record is fifteen. You're almost the same age as that kid," McGraw pointed out.

"He's got a point, Jim," Bones said.

"Maybe but I don't want the job. Not yet anyway. I'm pretty sure Davison has it," she chuckled.

"You think?" the Midshipman in question asked.

"Yep," Jim answered. "Your evals are outstanding, you got it in the bag. Now come on, kick off is soon and I want a good seat."

A few hours later, they all celebrated the Rebels' win with pizza and sodas. Final score was twenty-eight to seven.

"Why are you staring at me?" Bones asked. Jim shook her head. "Tell me?"

"I can't," she whispered.

"Why not?" he asked.

"You'll think I'm crazy… well, crazier."

"Maybe. Maybe not. Why don't you tell me what's up?" Bones said.

"I overheard a conversation today and it got me thinking, that's all."

"About what?" He looked up from his PADD.

"Have you had your first kiss yet?" she asked. He gave her a look. "Some of the girls were talking about their first kisses and I realized that I've never been kissed." She looked down at her hands. "I guess Tarsus threw a wrench in the whole normal progression of teenage milestones."

"Not really. I've never been kissed either and I'm older than you."

"Why not? You're adorable and the accent's cute. I'd kiss you." Jim slapped her hand over her mouth. Did she really just say that out loud? "Oh, God. Ignore me."

"I'd kiss you too," he whispered.

"But…?"

"But nothing. I'd kiss you. Just not right now because you're eating those gross chips."

"So, one day?" she asked.

"One day. Maybe," he smiled. "Now finish your paper."

Jim chuckled, "Sir. Yes, sir."

Chapter 11

"You! You did this." Jim sighed at the voice heading her way in the quad. Dealing with Pamela was not on her agenda for the day.

"How can I help you today, Pamela?" Jim asked sarcastically as she kept walking.

"You told Leonard to dump me," the woman growled.

"I can't tell Bones to do anything he doesn't want to do, first of all. Second, dump you? You were never together," Jim pointed out. "Don't be pissed at me if he pointed that out."

"You'll regret this," Pamela said to her.

Jim chuckled and pointed behind Pamela, "Actually, I think you're the one who's gonna regret this."

"Len," Pamela breathed when she turned around. Jim rolled her eyes. She loves Bones but these girls, who were older then him, keep falling all over themselves for his attention and it's a little weird.

"Don't call me that," he said as he walked over to them. "You good, Jim?"

"Fine. Two seconds away from punching the crap outta your friend," Jim answered.

"Don't do that. I had to fix your hand the last time you defended me," Bones chuckled before looking at Pamela. "I told you to leave us alone."

"But…"

"If you have a problem with Jim than you have a problem with me. There's no way to change that, no way to fix it. At the end of the day, I pick her. I'll always pick her. If you honestly think I'll go out with you after you insulted my… Jim then you're crazy," he said before Pamela could say anything. To be honest, Jim didn't know what to say either. "Just let it go."

Pamela looked at him for a long minute before she huffed and walked away.

"You're like a chick magnet," Jim mumbled.

"I have no idea how."

"I told you, it's the accent. Wins every time."

"What's up with you and McCoy?" McGraw asked when he dropping onto the grass next to Jim.

"I don't know what you're talking about," she said without looking up from the physics research on her PADD.

"Ha. You two came out here together, joined ROTC together, live together, spend all your time together and you expect me to believe that nothing's going on?" he asked.

"He has a date later with Elizabeth Dehner," Jim said with a shrug. She was actually scratching her head over that one, Elizabeth was a psych major and Bones hates shrinks.

"Really? I must be off. I could swear you guys gotta vibe. The way you look at each other when the other one isn't paying attention. The protective thing you both do… McCoy's a bit more obvious about it. Maybe I'm just reading too much into it."

"Probably. I mean, we are best friends and we're close."

"Well," McGraw said, "some of the best relationships stem from good friendships."

"Dude, I'll be fifteen in a week, can we not marry me off to my best friend?"

"I'm telling you, there's something there," her friend told her.

She looked at him, McGraw was as serious as she's ever seen him. Maybe he had a point.

Jim sighed, "Your observations are noted."

"What's your problem?" Jim asked Bones when he walked into their apartment.

"Nothing." It didn't look like nothing. He was running his hands through his thick brown hair and muttering to himself as he paced back and forth on the other side of the room. After a few minutes, he looked at her. "This is your fault."

"What the hell did I do?" she asked, sitting her PADD on the desk. Jim couldn't think of any reason he would be mad at her. They've both been busy in the last weeks of the semester and the only time they were in the same place, they were at ROTC functions, in the same classes or sleeping.

"My date sucked," Bones huffed.

"Okay. What does that have to do with me?" she asked him. Jim didn't particularly like the girl he was going out with but she didn't hate the girl either. Like them, Elizabeth was young, fifteen, and she was sweet. Bones could do much worse. He stared at her but didn't say anything. "Bones, what did I do?"

"Nothing. You're just…"

"What? I'm just what?" She was trying to figure out just what she did that affected his date and pissed him off do much.

"You," he said before he walked across the room and pressed a soft kiss against her lips. Jim opened her mouth a few times to say something but closed it when she realized that she didn't know what to say. "You speechless, that's a first. I spent the whole date thinking about coming home to hang out with you."

"Okay," she breathed. Was that her voice? It sounded like someone else was talking for her. "So…"

"So," he smiled. Jim looked up at him. When the hell did he get so tall? And why didn't she notice the flecks of gold in his eyes when he smiled until now? "Told you I'd kiss you."

"You did," Jim whispered. "Sate your curiosity?"

"That's not what… That's not why I kissed you, Jim."

"Uh huh," she mumbled.

"I like you," he said. "I like you."

"What? Since when?"

Bones chuckled, "I honestly don't know. I just know that I can't stop thinking about you and it's driving me crazy."

"Me?" Jim couldn't believe that she stuttered over the small word. There was no way he liked her like that. "Don't try to make me feel better. I choose not to date those idiots but I don't begrudge you your love life."

"I don't know if I should laugh at that or be pissed off," he grumbled. "I'm not talking out of pity, Jim. I honestly want to go out with you."

"You want to go on a date with me?" she squeaked. "What about Elizabeth?"

"I told her that I didn't think it would work, which is the truth. I can't get you out of my head and I realized that… I don't want to," he paused. "Will you go on a date with me, Jim?"

"I've never been on a date," Jim whispered after a long moment.

"I know. I've only been on three. It won't be anything flashy, just us and food, somewhere other than here. Please."

"Okay, as long as you promise not to kiss another girl when it's over," she told him.

"Why would I do that when I could kiss you?"

"Are you sure I'd let you?" Jim asked with a smirk.

"I'm sure."

"Okay, Jim. Breathe," Miss Pippa said over the vid-comm.

What do you do when you need girl talk? Comm the closest thing you have to a mom, even if she's the guardian of the boy you need to talk about. After her conversation with Bones, Jim was a little bit confused. Normally, Bones calms her down but he was kinda the problem at the moment.

"You're gonna be fine, sweetie," the older woman said.

"How did I not know any of this?" Jim asked.

"Because you've had a lot on your plate. You have always taken care of everyone and everything that you don't pay attention to yourself. And Lenny is good as keeping things to himself, especially where you're concerned."

"See… that. I didn't know he was so worried about me," Jim said. "Or that he liked me like that."

"Yes, you did. If you think about it hard enough you'll realize that even when he's grumbling at you, he still cared. It just took him a while to realize how much he cared," Pippa told her. "And now you know how much he cares too."

"We're going on a date," Jim muttered. "I have no idea what to do."

"Just be yourself. Lenny likes you because you're you, so don't try to be anything other than that and you'll be fine."

Jim sighed, "Are you sure?"

"Yes, I'm sure. You're gonna be fine."