A Promise Older than us

VASILISA 2

BANG! BANG!! BANG!!!

The deafening sounds of gunshots filled the room. I was at the shooting range again, in dire need of catharsis.

My blood was boiling as I aimed for the target's head, imagining the face of my soon-to-be husband, although I don't know what he looks like.

I hadn't been able to get the conversation I had with Deduska out of my head. The sting of the words was still fresh.

I didn't want to get married to anyone through an arranged marriage. I hated the concept of it more than anything.

“Wow, you've definitely blown the brains off that one”, Oleg, Deduska's second in command, quipped to my dismay.

“Not funny” I grumbled. He was like an uncle to me. A very cool uncle. He and my grandfather tend to be very entertaining when they're together.

“I pity the person she's envisioning on the other side. Considering how she hasn't had any breaks, I'm assuming she's upset” My instructor Tim pretended to shiver.

I wasn't upset, I was enraged! But Tim was right. I had been training since I woke up, trying to take my mind off things. Normally I'd lazy around or dodge training when I could.

But not today.

Deduska always made sure I wasn't some defenceless little girl. There's no space for that in the world I live in. I was reluctant at first but all it took was an assassination attempt when I was about ten years old to change my mind.

Someone managed to get through security and into my bedroom to kill me. I just happened to wake up when I did and screamed so loud I'm surprised the windows didn't shatter.

Since that day, I made sure I knew as much as I could about self-defence. Grandfather made me pick up a few skills. Wrestling, Archery, Knife throwing, Combat and how to not shoot myself in the foot with a gun.

Basic things everybody should know(!)

But behind the scenes, I'd prefer to work on my laptop. I'm more into hacking and cybersecurity than the on-site work.

But I do tend to get my hands dirty when required. So far, the Bratva has been out of wars, and I'd like to keep it that way.

We do have some trouble and a fair share of dirty work here and there, but Deduska has been keeping things quiet. Mostly because he doesn't want to go to war and have me lose the only family I have left.

Maybe that's why I'm being sold off so I can make my own family. Bitter, angry thoughts began to cloud my mind, pissing me off again.

“I believe it's her soon-to-be husband” Nothing gets past him. I see why he's second in command.

“Thank you for that astonishing observation”, I put the gun down before I accidentally shot someone. Even after this, I still didn't feel better. Not in the slightest.

“Maybe if I wrestle it out, I might just get the anger out?”

“With the type of emotion you're feeling, you might end up wrestling a bear. And winning” Tim handed me a towel to dry my face.

“If the circumstances were different you'd be over the moon and in a good mood for months but unfortunately—”

“The odds weren't in my favour. I know” I sighed. Oleg's right. If I were getting married for love, I would have been ecstatic, but behind my rage, all I could feel was misery and anguish for my future life.

The only happy Mafia marriage I've heard about is the one between my parents and even that didn't last long with their car accident and all.

I don't expect my husband to be loyal to me but if he brings his mistress home, then I'd make sure to break both his legs and cut off one of his balls.

“At least he could be handsome?” Tim suggested trying to make me feel better. I didn't know what he looked like nor did I care.

I refused to look him up. I'd rather be surprised. Because if I look him up and see a fat man close to 50 years old, I'd put a gun in my mouth and pull the trigger willingly.

“Or he could be a cyclops?” Oleg grinned. For someone who's in his late fifties, he really has a sense of humour.

“At least it wouldn't be difficult to blind him”, I couldn't help but smirk.

“Maybe you should do a less aggressive activity? Like reading a book, or going for a walk, or cooking. It's been a while since you've done that”

“Thanks, Oleg, but if I get too close to a burner, I might end up committing arson instead of a fresh meal. But thanks anyway”

I forced myself to smile before walking out of the range. I didn't rush myself, after all, where was I rushing to? I tried to enjoy the walk from the range to my room.

What's worse about this is I can't even talk to my grandfather about this. His hands are tied. A part of me began to wonder if this would still happen if my parents were alive.

Especially my mother. What would she say about this? Grandfather said I took her pitch black hair but kept the grey eyes of our family. At least I took something from both sides.

When I think about it, this is the opportunity a lot of girls would kill for. Being engaged to a Mafia don no matter how handsome or ugly he is. Never have to work a day in their lives and have all the money they want.

It's a life I've known. The lavish parties, expensive and exquisite tastes, all that good stuff. While I do appreciate having more than an average person does, in the end, it cost me my freedom.

Eventually, I made it to my room and made a beeline to the shower. I let the water run from my head to my toes. And in the midst of it, I found myself crying.

I don't let people see me cry. Whenever I broke down, it was when I was sure no one would see me, and the shower was the perfect place.

Never have I ever felt so helpless. I hate the feeling. The feeling of not being able to shape my own destiny. Not having a say in my own life and living how I'd want to live it.

After a brief pity party, I dragged myself into my room and began drying my hair while examining my features in the mirror.

My almond eyes were slightly swollen and puffy from crying. I couldn't even fake a smile if my life depended on it. I opened my wardrobe and got out my fluffy pyjama set with Teddy bears and stars.

Reaching for my phone, I asked for snacks to be brought up to my room while I set up Netflix on my TV, looking for something to watch.

The snacks came in record time, I thanked the maid and shut the door. I put on The Big Bang Theory. Normally, it would have made me laugh, but not today.

Nothing worked.

I was staring into space more than I was watching. Everything was just background noise as I zoned out into the unavoidable future.