Drowned In His Desire

2

They told me a team was on the way and they'd send an ambulance to my house. I ended the call. I wrapped my arms around her and held her. She was a tiny little thing.

"Honey, can you tell me what happened," I asked her.

"We... it... there was a log... she was trapped," she couldn't go on. She wept uncontrollably for about five minutes. "I tried to help her. I couldn't... I couldn't get her out! I couldn't!" Her voice was full of agony. "I dove and dove, but I was too... too weak! I got tired, but I tried and tried! I knew she was... was drowning. Oh my God, what am I going to do?" It was a wail of despair. "I tried until I couldn't swim anymore! I went under... you saved me, didn't you? Why?" she beat on me with her tiny fists. "Why didn't you just let me die? Why couldn't it have been me? How can I... what am... Oh God, I just want to die!" She was hysterical and I wrapped her in my arms and just held her.

"I know, honey," I petted her hair and just whispered to her. "I know. It's awful, just let me hold you, you're safe. It hurts, I know. Be strong, now. Kara would want you to be strong. What's your name?"

She didn't respond for a minute, just burying her face in my chest and crying uncontrollably. "Dara," I finally heard a choked reply.

A terrible thought darkened my brain. Could they be twins? Jesus Christ, it was bad enough the way it was; that would just be nightmarish! I held her shaking little form for about twenty minutes, just talking to her quietly, and I heard sirens in the distance.

"I'm going to go down and let the EMTs in," I told her. "I'll be right back."

They pulled up just as I opened the front door, and I led them upstairs. I told the leader of the rescue team to check the rapid and the bend up above my place. I knew a lot of people got pushed up against that bank when they were floating. They checked her over and tried to get her to go with them. "No!" she fought and struggled with them. Her eyes met mine and I could see the despair. "Help me!" it was a choking call.

"Guys, guys, stop!" I finally had to yell. I went and sat by her. She clung to me desperately. "I'm going to take you to the ambulance, Dara," I told her.

She nodded. Those huge brown eyes looked up at me pleadingly. "Don't leave me!" she begged. "Don't let them take me."

I looked at the guy beside me. He nodded. "I'll go with you," I told her. "I won't leave you."

"Thank you," she whispered. "What's your name?"

"Canyon, Canyon Granger," I told her. "What's your last name, honey? Should we call someone?"

Her chin quivered. "My name is Rockwell. Mom, we should call Mom. What am I going to tell her, Canyon?" She broke down again and I squeezed her tiny body tightly.

"We'll figure something out, baby. Just hold on," I said.

I sat her down so we could climb into the ambulance. The EMTs didn't put up a fuss and we were on our way. I got her to punch the number into my phone and I called while we were on the way.

A woman answered on the third ring. Her voice sounded tense and worried. "Mrs. Rockwell?" I asked.

"Yes, may I ask who's calling?" her voice shook a little.

"Ma'am, you don't know me," I said. "My name is Canyon Granger. I live over near Greenville and I just need to ask you to meet me at the hospital."

"The girls!" I heard the pain in her voice. "Are the girls with you? Did something happen to my girls?"

"Mrs. Rockwell, I should tell you about this at the hospital," I told her. "I will tell you that I'm with one of your girls now. Please, just meet us there, okay?"

"I'm on my way." The line went dead.

"She's on her way," I told Dara. I could see relief and anxiety on her face at the same time.

The EMT covered her up with a warm blanket and I saw one little hand worm its way out and reach toward me. I took it and it was like holding a child's hand. He asked her a bunch of questions and she answered them in a very subdued voice. When he was finished, there was a silence for a minute. I felt awkward so I thought I should say something.

"Do you mind me asking you how old you are?" I said.

She looked up at me with those warm, sad brown eyes. "I'm twenty-three," she said. "How old are you?"

"I'm thirty-three," I said.

"Where is your wife?" she asked.

"How do you know I'm married?" I wondered. She held up our hands and I could see her fingers on my wedding ring.

"Ah, you're a detective," I said.

A smile flickered across her features and it was as if I had been struck by lightning. God, she was cute!

"Cybill passed away three years ago," I told her.

Tears trickled down her cheeks. "I'm so sorry," she whispered. "What happened, if you don't mind talking about it?"

"No, I don't mind," I said. I squeezed her hand. "She was on her way home from work one day. She was a schoolteacher. A deer jumped out in front of her and she swerved to miss it. Her SUV turned over and she slid into a ravine. It was a steep drop and she... she didn't make it."

She pulled my hand to her face and kissed it. "I can tell you really loved her," she said.

"I did, and I still do," I said. "I honor her memory by living life the way she would want me to. I don't honor her if I live my life in regret. She loved me and she wanted me to be happy."

She sobbed a little and held my hand against the soft skin of her cheek. I stroked it with one finger and she smiled at me through her tears. "Thank you, Canyon," she said. "I'll remember that. It's going to help me a lot."

We pulled into the hospital emergency entrance and they wouldn't let me go back with her. I told her I'd be in the waiting room and she reluctantly let me go. I had been there maybe five minutes when a woman came rushing in. She talked to the girl at the desk and they buzzed her in. I thought it was probably Dara's mother; she looked a lot like Dara. I waited about twenty minutes and she came into the waiting room.

"Dara wants to see you," she said. I could tell she was on the verge of collapse herself. She had obviously been crying. We walked down the rows of beds and she stopped me.

"I want to thank you, Mr. Granger," she said. "Dara told me that you saved her life and what happened. I don't know how you happened to be where you were but I'll always be grateful to you. I don't think I would have survived if I had lost... if I had lost both my babies."

Sobs shook her and she started to sink to the floor. I caught her and hugged her to me. She put her arms around me and wept bitter tears into my chest.

"I know it hurts," I stroked her hair. "You're hurting and it's okay to cry. We'll just stay right here until you feel better. You are going to have to be strong for Dara. She's going to need you badly."

She was a short, cute, little chubby thing, probably about ten years older than me. You could tell she had been very cute when she was Dara's age. She sniffed and looked around for some tissues. I saw a box on a table and steered her over there.

"Thank you, Mr. Granger," she said. "We shouldn't leave her alone for very long."