Chapter Seven
When You Unironically Like Riverdale
After such an incredible turn of events, you might wonder what Ham and Harry will do next. Will Ham race to Boston in his sports car and confront his uncle? Will Harry betray his best friend and go to the police? Will the two boys give in to their feelings and finally kiss in a blaze of passion?
No. Nothing of that sort happens. In fact, the only thing that does happen is that the two of them go back to Ham’s house and stay there for the rest of the day.
They spend most of the afternoon smoking weed and playing Super Smash Bros. (For the record, Ham mains Jigglypuff, and Harry goes for Link.) Then, after ordering pizza, they dig around in Gretchen’s enormous wine cellar. It’s so big that Ham is absolutely positive she won’t notice a fe
