No Rebound

Chapter 6

Chapter 6Turns out, the answer was no. Instead, she spoke:

‘I know it takes some adjusting to but I need to be able to see you when you talk. What do I have to do to make you look at me? Am I going to have to hold onto your face like this all the time to keep you looking in my direction?’

Well if ever there was a loaded question! I would happily look at her for hours on end and was tempted to say just that, but that’s not what she meant. Was it?

‘I’m sorry Jess, I keep forgetting but I promise I’ll try harder. Having said that you’re welcome to keep hold of my face.’ I said with a soft smile.

‘At least you’re trying.’ And the tinge of sadness in her voice was unmistakable.

‘So do I gather that someone else didn’t try?’ Her eyes closed and she sighed deeply before replying ‘yeah. I was engaged to a guy when I lost my hearing. He stuck it out for about 9 months but things just weren’t the same after I left hospital and he broke it off. He said it had nothing to do with my deafness but I didn’t believe him, especially since he hadn’t really wanted to make love in all of that time and we’d had such a good s*x life before.’

How could you NOT want to make love to this woman for 9 months? Her hands were still on my face and her thumbs were gently caressing my cheeks. The temptation to lean in and kiss her was almost overpowering but I didn’t want to ruin the evening so I reeled myself back in and asked her what she wanted to drink instead.

I was in turmoil inside. It felt like her caresses were flirting with me and yet she’d just told me she’d been engaged to a man; the mixed signals weren’t helping me work her out one little bit and unfortunately I wasn’t blessed with a finely tuned gaydar!

Pulling reluctantly away from her hands I poured us both a brandy and we sat in the living room. We were both on the sofa but turned toward each other so that we could talk, our knees touching slightly if one of us moved.

We talked long into the night and occasionally her hand would land on my leg or arm as she emphasised a point, or to make me keep my face turned in her direction and every little touch seared itself into my consciousness like a hot brand.

Jessica seemed oblivious to the effect she was having on me but at times it was all I could do to concentrate on what she was saying and restrain myself from launching myself at her.

Having left the sofa to visit the bathroom, I returned to find Jessica sound asleep. She had slumped down into the cushions and I knew she was going to wake stiff and sore if I left her like that, so I tried to wake her.

Stupidly, I spent a couple of minutes crouched down next to her calling her name softly before I realised just what an i***t I was being, so I gently rocked her shoulder in an attempt to wake her.

She didn’t wake but she did slip further down onto the sofa seat, so I lifted her legs so that she was stretched out, fetched a spare duvet and tucked her in tenderly. I then left a note on the coffee table telling her where everything important was in the house and inviting her to help herself if she awoke before me.

It seemed the most natural thing in the world to kiss her forehead gently before I turned off most of the lights and headed into my own room where I lay for a long time just contemplating the woman who was currently sleeping soundly on my sofa.

Eventually sleep wrapped me in its embrace and I slept soundly until I was woken by the sounds of Saturday morning life that were drifting in through my bedroom windows.