Half Of Rhea

The Gift

The next 7 days crept by slowly, as Rhea’s body healed. She concentrated on recuperation and rest, taking time to spend with Laken, having long baths and getting plenty of sleep. It helped she was actively avoiding everyone she knew, pulling her son out of Kindergarten for the week certainly helped in concealing her injuries. Now though, the bruises around her eyes and lips were mere blemishes on her skin. The swelling had gone down around her chin, where the fingerprints had disappeared. She moved with ease, no longer sleeping on a bed of pillows to lessen the pain. Some sort of semblance to normal life had resumed. The house had become her sanctuary, her safe place. She didn’t want to leave it especially since they were on their own without any threats.

Zane had not been seen, since the day after Jude and Russell left. He had slept on the couch and in the morning when she woke, most of his belongings had been packed into his car and he was nowhere to be seen. She hoped he had gone for good, as it was the most peaceful week she had experienced in years. She pottered around her house cleaning up and vacuuming. Her phone chimed and she picked it up in one hand while continuing to spray and wipe with the other.

Sage- WTF mate? Wea ru!

Rhea- Sorry girlfriend things have been hectic…. What u up2?

Sage- hectic my f*****g ass!... its been 8days b***h I thort u was dead

Rhea- Stop being dramatic and come see me ill pop the jug on.

Sage- Fine I’ll be there in 20 xx

Rhea- Sweet x

Rhea had to bite the bullet and start engaging with the world at some stage. Now that she could easily hide what had happened, the thought of seeing people didn’t come with the feelings of anxiety and dread, which had consumed her for the past 8 days.  Her anger and sadness had subsided and she felt sort of normal again.

It was weird she thought, how absolutely distraught she felt less than a week ago and here she was now, waiting for a friend, to have a gossip session and a coffee. A part of her knew she was just trying to block out the reality of the situation. To just pretend it never happened was easier than acknowledging it and the pain. It’s too frigging early to be thinking about this bullshit. The back door flew open and in waltzed a very pissed off looking Sage.

“HEY!.... You little sh*t you’ve been avoiding me.” She stormed into her home like a madwoman walking straight up to Rhea, pulling her into a hug and then pushing her backwards with a hard shove, to look her up and down. She was clearly offended at first, but upon closer inspection, she realised something had changed in Rhea’s appearance and demeanour.

“You don’t look the same?”….

“Wait, what are you wearing?”…

“Are they bruises on your face?”…

She spoke so rapidly and consecutively, she never gave her the opportunity to reply. Rhea’s mouth opened and closed then opened again. She wondered if she resembled a fish and giggled out loud.

“This isn’t a f*****g joke Rhea-Rhea!”

“Sorry mate…. Sorry I’m not laughing at you, just hold on and take a seat, I’ll fill you in.”

Sage looked suspicious but she took a seat at the table quietly. Rhea followed with drinks and sat too… Unsure of where to start she took a deep breath and dived straight into it. From the words to the actions, the hits to the cuts of material. The shower, the tears, Jude and Russell.

They sat at the table with a couple of coffees and Sage let Rhea speak uninterrupted. Half-way through the conversation, when Rhea was talking about the destruction of the dress, Sage got up and went and sat at the backdoor, lighting up a cigarette. She hid her face from her friend, so she couldn’t see her tears. Rhea repeated the events as best as she could, void of emotion as if to prove to Sage, how tough and unaffected she was.

She was fooling no-one, Sage turned towards her friend not ashamed for her to see the tears coming down her cheeks. She sniffed and wiped her nose on her sleeve.

“Don’t you try act hard around me, you little sh*t.” She sniffed loudly and took another drag on her ciggy. Her head down, she looked at the step and kicked a stone. “You should have called me Rhea.”  Sadness seeped out of her words as they came out quieter and slowly. Rhea realised she wasn’t just hurt at the circumstances, she was hurt that Rhea hadn’t reached out for help.

“I couldn’t look at myself in the mirror without feeling disgusted Sagey, I couldn’t even comprehend what had happened. Please don’t be disappointed in me…”

“Mmm I shouldn’t have left you alone that afternoon, after I dropped you off.” She sighed and Rhea could only remember a handful of times that Sage was this serious. “I knew Zane was in a shitty, bastard mood. I shouldn’t have left you.” She said it again this time to reiterate the guilt that she was carrying.

“It’s not your fault Sagey…. No-one can predict his unpredictable behaviour.” She went and sat down next to her friend grabbing the cigarette out of her hand and taking a long hard puff.

“HEY! Since when do you smoke?”

“It just seemed like the right time to have one.” She shrugged and handed it back to Sage. They giggled and bumped shoulders.

“What if I am a bad influence on you just like judgey Jude and rarse-hole Russell said?” Sage looked down again.

“They’re fuckers my mate, judgemental fuckers. My heart tells me who are good people, and you my friend….. You are one of the best!.... But in all seriousness.” Rhea paused for a moment seeming to be in deep thought. “Rarse-hole? Was that the best alliteration you could come up with?”

They laughed and shared the rest of the cigarette, coming up with better alternatives. Repulsive, repellent and revolting were thrown around but they both decided they liked rarse-hole Russell the best.

“What are you going to do though Rhea? You know this is not okay, people can’t beat other people and get away with it. You should have rung the police.”

“I was going to run away mate, take off with Laken to my mum’s family, an escape." She closed her eyes and sighed, "... But I’m worried if I do, then he will follow me down there and potentially hurt them. I have to move on here, in front of him, I don’t want to be pushed out of my own home, my town, we love it here.” She sighed “I want him to stay out of my house.”

“He will never leave you alone, you know that right?”

“He doesn’t have a choice.”

“We’ll see.” Sage muttered and looked at Rhea marvelling at her naivety. She knew damn well that Zane wouldn’t relinquish one inch of control over his dominion. Least of all, ever let Rhea move on without him.

“Well mate, you know I’m here if you need me, I’ve got to get back to Ma and the kids.” She decided now was not the time to hit her with that truth, she had been through too much already. She got up, gave Rhea a hug and left promising to come back tomorrow, so they could go for a walk.

Rhea was sitting there sure of her decision to be stronger, to take control of this situation and keep Zane’s useless arse out.

Today Laken was getting dropped off by Mrs O’shea, so she waited patiently for her boy to get back. When a car pulled up, she excitedly got up from the couch to head to the back door. A hollering little man came running to her a wide grin on his face.

“Mama! Mama mama mama!...” She heard him before she saw him.

“Guess what guess what!?” He was trying to desperately catch his breath. He chucked his bag and jumped at her and she smiled at him.

“Dad got me a dog!”

“What…?” she turned towards the door and looked at the man she despised. Shock and anger was all she could muster. He stood there sheepishly holding onto a little tan brown puppy with a blue bandana.

“Yeah mama he got me a dog! Look at him he’s so cute!”

He jumped off his mum and ran back to the door to grab the puppy off his father. Rhea stood there shocked. Practical things started running through her mind. What the hell is he doing here? Why is there a f*****g dog? How could she feed another mouth?

She closed her eyes. “We cannot keep a puppy here son. Sorry we are not allowed pets and we can’t afford to feed another mouth.” She opened her eyes and looked down at her son who was looking so distraught.

“Please mama, I’ll do anything! I love him!” tears started welling in his eyes.

 “Please let him keep the puppy, I will look after it, feed it, walk it.” Zane pleaded.

Rhea knew what this was. This was emotional manipulation and he had used their son to get a way back into this house and her good books, however it had just thrown up more anger and stress.

“Can we talk in the lounge please?” She said back, unmoved.

He followed Rhea into the lounge and they shut Laken in the kitchen watching a cartoon, with the puppy and snacks.

“What the f**k Zane!?”

“I’m sorry, I just had to make it up to you guys and he always wanted a puppy.”

“This is not making it up to me, this is adding another stress, I don’t want you here Zane, you have to leave.” She stood there defiantly, he must have expected it because he didn’t react. Instead tears came down his face.

“I’m so sorry Rhea, I know I keep saying it, but I have a lot of things going on right now.”

“So what do you want?” She asked him earnestly. “You don’t like us, you barely tolerate us, and you’re never home, so just let us go. You have to let us go. What you did was not okay, it will never be okay and I will never forgive you.” She pleaded with him. He looked at her for a moment and she thought he might agree, but he shook his head.

“You’re my family.” He continued shaking his head. "I love you guys."

She sighed, “You can’t treat me this way, then disappear for days and show up with a puppy, thinking this fixes the situation.”

“I know, I have nowhere else to go Rhea, Please just let me sleep on the couch. I promise I won’t hurt you guys.”

“Where have you been?” It was the first time she had enquired, in a long time, about what he does outside of their home.

“I’ve been with the bro’s, sussing some things, I crashed on Mikey’s couch a couple nights and slept in my car the others.” He seemed sad and looked dirty. There were prominent bags under his eyes and he looked up at Rhea. She knew she shouldn’t, she knew she should stay angry but he looked so pathetic she felt sorry for him.

“I’m starving too Rhea, I haven’t eaten in days.” He looked back down and she knew he was trying to evoke sympathy.

"That's your own fault" she replied unmoved. 

"I'm not used to you being so angry at me Rhea-Rhea.... I was just jealous and angry that you looked so beautiful. Who were you dressing up for?.... it wasn't for me, I know that much."

"You can't keep blaming my clothes for what you did Zane!" ..... "No amount of jealousy ever justifies a man putting his hands on a woman." ..... "When did this ever become okay for you?" ..... "You are barely ever home, you're dismissive and mean and now!... Now hitting is okay?"

"I'm sorry I dunno how many times I can say it.... I wasn't myself... I'll never do it again!"

He jumped down at her feet and grabbed a hold of her legs and hugged her calves. He looked up into her face and begged for another chance. His eyes filled with tears as they dropped onto her feet, his nose was running and he began wiping it onto her black tights.

"Please... please don't leave me too.... everyone leaves me." He sobbed and grabbed at her thighs trying to pull her closer to his chest. This man was the opposite of the one that had hurt her so badly, a week ago. 

At that point Laken came into the lounge with the puppy. "Are you okay dad?" he looked at his father with sad eyes.

"I just want to stay here with you and your mum son".... his tears kept falling and Lakens face stared at his mum.

"Don't make dad leave mum... he's so sad." 

“Fine, sleep on the couch, don’t come near me and look after that puppy.” She pushed him backwards and put some distance between the two of them. Zane picked up Laken and gave him a big kiss and looked at Rhea with gratitude.

She turned towards the kitchen scolding herself, she promised she would never let him in again.

“Thank you Rhea, I really appreciate it. I promise i'll be a good house guest.” She stopped in her tracks and turned to face him. He was throwing Laken up in the air and for the first time in years, she saw her son happy with his dad. This was all she ever wanted, a happy family with love. This however didn't feel entirely genuine and she closed the door behind her, suspicion clouding her thoughts. 

This was not at all, what she had planned. Now she was still in her town, in her house, with the man who hit her. Rhea went into the kitchen and started cooking dinner. Sage is going to be so disappointed in me, she thought as she ran her hands through her hair. Maybe he had changed after what he did? maybe it was the thing to finally make him realise, he did want this family. Rhea was utterly confused her head and her heart at odds with each other.

Zane and Laken sat at the table hooking in to the food, sounds of satisfaction and grunts of pleasure were coming out of them, as Rhea cleaned up the mess. She couldn't stomach the idea of eating when she was so confused and instead, let them enjoy it by themselves.

“This is delicious thank you.”

“Mama this is so good!”

She nodded at them and went to her bedroom, they can eat in peace she thought. As she closed the door her phone chimed.

[unknown]-Hey Rhea, this is Slade how you been?

Rhea gasped, she never expected Slade to ever text her. What if Zane saw or heard? She thought about deleting the message but she wanted to read it a few more times. She clicked off her screen jumped on her bed and hid her phone under her pillow. Sh*t... what do I do? Thoughts were jumbling around in her confused head. She pulled her phone out from under her pillow and listened intently, hoping not to hear any footsteps coming towards her room. She re-read the text then clicked her screen off and then unlocked her phone to read it again.

She started hitting her screen, excitement and nervousness making her muscles shake lightly as her fingers hit the wrong letters repeatedly causing many backspaces and autocorrects.

She hit send, her heart in her throat, her phone now on silent.