Never Again

CHAPTER TWO

Alex

Me and Jace head out to my red Chevy truck that I got 9 months ago for my last birthday that I had Aaron drop off for me. Jace holds his hand out to me. Confused, I look up at him, my eyebrow raised.

“What?” I ask him, my voice still coming out much to slow. Apparently, my brain is still being slow as well. He starts talking, and it takes a second to reach my ears and translate into English.

“Give me your keys, you’re in no condition to be driving.” He says to me, even though he’s speaking slowly I can tell that his tone leaves no room for negotiation. Well, I’ve never been one to listen to authority. As if I’ll let him drive the truck I just got, no way.

“Yeah, that’s a no from me little bro.” I say, knowing my words are slow and slurred and not caring. I wonder if this is what I would sound like drunk. That makes me giggle, and Jace looks at me in a way I can tell is concerned and confused. His eyebrows scrunch together, and his hands start twitching, something he only does when he’s excessively nervous or concerned. Oh well, he can be concerned if he wants to be. He doesn’t have any reason to.

I am about to say something else when the world starts spinning, and nothing makes sense. I feel myself fall, but I don’t register what’s happening. Why is there nothing but spinning colors? I kind of like this. Actually maybe I don’t. Just as I start feeling nauseous, I come back to reality and realize that I’m on the ground and Jace is above me, trying to shake me aware.

“Jace, calm down. I-I’m fine. Uhm…” I say, hesitating. I don’t like not being able to, but I would rather admit that I can't than get in a wreck and die before I can get revenge on Max. I swallow, my throat as dry as the Sahara. “You can drive.” I say, fishing in the pocket of my pants for the keys. I finally find my key, a plain black one with all the fancy buttons, attached to my Air Pods. Another gift from mister Father of the Year over here. I love the case though, mom got it for me. It's a little book, and you can open the front cover to show my name and number, plus there's a little bookmark thing that came with it that you can attach to it, it's super cute.

I hand Jace the key and he helps me up and we walk to the truck. I circle to the passenger side and barely avoid stepping in a puddle. Thankfully I decided to wear my boots today. Waterproof for the win I think to myself, giggling again. What the heck? I don’t giggle. Whatever. I get in the truck, where Jace is already inside, and put my feet on the dash, watching little dirt flakes fall off of my boots.

As we start driving away, I realize that it's not raining. So… why was there a puddle? It's probably not even important and I'm so tired. I always fall asleep in moving vehicles, there's just something so soothing about the motion. I feel my eyes get heavy and start to close, my long lashes messing up my vision. I yawn and Jace looks at me, questioningly.

“You tired sis?” He asks me, and I can tell he's genuinely wondering. I struggle to force the words out before I fall the rest of the way asleep.

“I always fall asleep… in the car…” I say to him, my eyes falling further shut. “Oh, and uhm,” My sentence is punctured by another yawn, my eyes tingling as though I'm offending them by keeping them open. “There was a puddle in the parking lot, and it's not-“ I yawn again, becoming annoyed with my body for interrupting me again, and continue hesitantly. “Since it's not raining.” I finish, uncertain.

“I’ll look into it.” He says to me, smiling. “Goodnight Lex.” He looks back at the road and the last thing I see is him pulling his Jacket off to cover me with, and I can feel it's still warm from him wearing it. I snuggle into it and fall into the first restful sleep I’ve had in a while.

**30 minutes later**

“Lex, it's time to wake up, we're here.” I open my eyes to see Jace standing outside my door with one hand on my shoulder and the other holding out a pack of baby wipes, which I gratefully accept. I take one out and start to wipe my face, realizing I must have drooled in my sleep. Eh, it's nothing Jace hasn’t seen me do before.

I step out of the truck and look around. We're at Aarons vacation cabin in the woods that hasn't been used in years. It holds some really bad memories, and my first instinct is to run away and get as far away as I can, as fast as I can. I think about it for a second and realize that, despite how much this place gives me the heebie jeebies, it's a great place to plan. No cameras, no neighbors, and my family owns the property so we don't have to worry about getting in trouble for being on it.

"Alright." I say to Jace, who has been holding open my door while I muttered my thoughts, and nod. "This is perfect, let's head in." We start walking, and I keep getting wet leaves mucked in my boots. That's another thing we'll have to watch out for, I don't want to get caught because of a little bit of mucky leaves that got on my shoes and then tracked at the crime scene.

We make it to the door and I remember something. I turn around and run back to the truck, grabbing my key out of the key hole and shutting the door. I run back to the house and jump through the door. I watch little bits of mucky leaf scatter all over the floor and giggle again. Seriously, what the heck? I never giggle. Like, ever. Not since I was a toddler, before... IT happened.

We walk into the kitchen and sit down at the little four-seat cherry wood table we've had since I can remember. It's one of those ones where you can pull it apart and put another piece of wood in the middle to make a bigger table. Jace sets a notepad and pen on the table that he must have pulled out of his a*s, because it wasn't there a second ago. we sit there for a second before we start talking.

"Man, this place holds a hell of a lot of memories, doesn't it?" Jace asks me, although I can tell he's not really expecting an answer. I look around, remembering all the negative and positive memories I have here. Me and mom and Jace chasing each other through the kitchen, as Aaron and 'auntie' Marianna (as if) sat at the kitchen table laughing at us and eating breakfast. Jace crying because he fell on the dock near the lake and got a splinter in his knee, and me trying my best to pull it out, blood from the scrapes dripping down his leg and staining his favorite blue swim trunks. Aaron and his friend Joseph leading four year old me to the bedroom while mom was in the lake with Jace, each one holding one of my hands as they led me to the bed. Joe and Aaron telling me if mom found out then she would become homeless and I would never see her again, telling me it was 'normal' that 'all the kids do it' that I'd be 'weird' if I didn't. "I don't care if I'm weird." little me said. "Your mom will hate you." Joseph said to little me. That shut little me up fast.

I feel the wet warmth of tears sliding down my face as the memories from my childhood assault me, leaving me breathless. In an instant Jace is there, wiping away the tears. He was always the only one who understood me or my twisted feelings. I lean forward and hug him hard, hit by a sudden complete gratefulness for him and his presence.

"Why... why d-did you leave m-me alone, Jace? I really n-needed you, and I missed y-you so much." I managed to stutter out through my wracking sobs. My chest heaved and I knew I was making the ugliest face on Earth, but as much as I tried, I couldn't bring myself to care. Hot tears slid down my face fast and I damn near fell off my chair. Jace pulled a napkin out of the little napkin holder in the middle of the table and handed it to me so I could wipe my face off. I calmed down as Jace rubbed my back and began to speak. I wiped my face off and listened.

"Well, all those years ago 'Dad'" his sentence is punctuated with air quotes around the word Dad, "sent me to a boarding school until I reached 9th. When I came back, the family living at where we used to live together couldn't tell me anything other than that you guys had moved away." He pauses, hesitating as if he's not sure what to say next. He starts again "I didn't have any clue how to find you guys, since you didn't have a number yet when I left and Mom doesn't have a phone anymore, and Dad changed his number. I didn't even know if you guys were okay, since I couldn't get ahold of any of you. Not until today when I got that call from the hospital. Good thing my number has been the same all these years, huh? Mom has me as one of her kids and has my number on there, but I guess she didn't call because she didn't have a phone and since it's been so long she didn't know if I was okay." He looks away from me, as if he's ashamed to be telling me all this. He has nothing to be ashamed for, I'm just ashamed of Aaron for acting like such a d**k to him. He sits on the floor, staring off into space.

He closes his eyes and sighs as one tear falls down his cheek, wiping it away with his hand as quickly as it drops. He slowly opens up his eyes and tilts his head to look up at me from his place on the floor. I can see that his eyes are shining with unshed tears, and the air crackles with the tension of unsaid words. I kneel on the floor in front of him and wipe the slowly flowing tears off his cheeks and hug him.

"It's alright, little bro. As long as we're together we'll be fine. Just stand up and wipe the dirt off of your knees." I tell him, quoting what I told him all those years ago when he fell on the pier as a kid. We sit there hugging each other for the next few minutes before we finally sit back in our chairs and start planning.

"Okay, so I've been planning this for a long time. I'm not stupid though, I know that my plans have flaws. That's part of where you come in. I need you to help me plan new ways and tweak old ones. My original idea: poison tipped dart. We could craft a makeshift blowgun without buying one, and then go get a blowgun dart from the alley downtown. I know someone." I say, hoping that we don't do this one, since it's the least violent way I thought of. Jace starts biting his lip and I know he's thinking it over. He thinks for a couple of minutes before he stops staring into space and starts looking at me.

"Well," he says, still thinking. "That would work, but we would need to worry about D.N.A on the needle or dart. Plus, where would we get the poison? Where would we store it after? We're only 15 so we could buy something that's only deadly when introduced through the bloodstream legally, they probably wouldn't even suspect anything while we were buying it. But we would probably be considered suspects and there would be cameras at the store... that's good, but we should keep brainstorming to see if we could come up with something even better." He finishes and looks at me worried, probably nervous about what I'll say.

"Alright." I say simply, hiding my joy. He looks at me with that look he gets when he knows something that he thinks I don't know that he knows, and I know that he can tell that I'm secretly happy he said no. How much exactly he knows about the reason on the other hand I'm not sure. He doesn't say anything though, and just shakes his head before continuing.

"What else do you have?" Jace asks me, glancing at his jacket that I still have on. I forgot that I was wearing it until he looked at it. I looked down at the very few stains and burn holes that disrupt the smoothness of the brown. I never thought the burn holes strange until now, knowing that Jace doesn't smoke. Or, he didn't, before he left.

"Do you..." I hesitate, not wanting to give it back. It's so warm, and since its the winter the cabin is cold. I look to see that Jace is wearing a short sleeved T-shirt with his dark denim jeans. It's selfish of me to keep it on, especially since I'm wearing a jacket under his coat and he doesn't have one. I love how warm it is, and it reminds me of when we were kids, back when he would always give me his jacket when he thought I was cold. "Do you want it back?" I ask him, knowing he does, and also knowing he won't tell me he does. He looks at it and blinks twice before slowly shaking his head no, his hair falling in front of his eyes.

"Nah, you keep it sis, I'm warm enough." He never did tell me when he wanted anything from me, always falling into the older sibling role even though technically I'm older. Only by 15 minutes, but still. I take the jacket off and hand it to him anyways, because God knows he would never just say 'Yeah, actually I would like my jacket back.' He looks at it and looks back at me, biting his lip in thought as his hair falls even more in front of his face. I shove the jacket closer to him. He finally shakes his head a little and sighs, taking the jacket. He knows that if there's anyone on this planet more stubborn than him, it's me.

"Okay... So what's your idea then little bro?" I ask, grinning widely. I know he hates when I call him that since he's only 15 minutes younger than me. He scowls at me, showing off his perfect teeth. I laugh at his expression. He rolls his dark eyes up so he's looking at the ceiling. He bites his lip, thinking again. He bites a little harder than usual and I watch blood drip down his lip. I stop grinning as my eyes widen.

"Jace! Stop it, you're bleeding!" I jump up to grab a paper towel from the counter. These are the mustiest paper towels I have ever seen. I think to myself. I shake my head and get one damp. I hand him the paper towel and he wipes off his lip. He hands it back to me and I slide it into my pocket without thinking. "What the h*ll were you thinking about so hard Jace?" I feel hot tears dampening my cheeks and I taste salt. His eyes widen as I start crying.

"Sis, calm down." Jace grabs my shoulders, pulling me in for a hug. He kisses the top of my head and ruffles up my hair. He holds me at arms length, looking me in the eye. Even though he's the only person who's ever seen me cry, he's only ever seen me do it a couple of times, so it's still awkward for him. "Hey, it's alright, its just a little split." He touches his lip before looking at his finger. He shows me, saying "See? It's not even bleeding anymore, we're all good." He pulls me back in, and I feel his fingers dig into my back as he squeezes me.

I pull away and sit in my chair. I close my eyes, taking one deep breath before I open them again. I look at Jace and we get back to planning.

"Okay so I was thinking, what if we did something... a tad bit more on the violent side of things?" I ask Jace, a dangerous gleam in my eyes. He looks at me, as if he's actually seeing me for the first time, even though he's known me since the day I was born. He smirks, leaning back in his chair and I listen to it creak under his weight. Old a*s chairs.

"Hmm," he says, clicking his pen. Most people get annoyed as heck when people do that, but I've always been strangely calmed by the noise. "And what, pray tell, were you thinking?" He asks me. It takes me a second to figure out what the gleam in his eyes is since I've never seen it before, my brother being such a gentle person. Danger. Murder. A need for blood. I smile widely and start to tell him about my favorite plan that I've come up with and he agrees almost immediately.

"I think that is my favorite plan ever. A few tweaks and it'll be perfect." He says to me, the largest smile I've ever seen on his face. I have to tell him soon, or I'm going to explode with the weight of the secret I'm hiding from him. I feel a twinge of sadness at the thought of telling him, but it's quickly drowned by a strange mix of fear and relief.

"Jace... " I pause, not sure how to continue. I feel the tears building up in my eyes. "He..." Hot, salty tears stream down my face as I attempt to talk. He leans in and hugs me, hard. I continue. "I told him no Jace, I yelled and screamed and kicked and fought and he slapped me, hard. H-he knocked me to the floor. I lay there sobbing, and he just didn't care. Mom was at the store. He picked me up and threw me to the bed. Taped my f*cking hands together, and handcuffed me to the bed. H-he... he... I couldn't..." I break down into sobs that wrack my whole body and cause me to almost fall forward off my chair. Jace pulls me to the floor and just holds me as I cry and try to stutter out the story.

I look up at his face and see that Jace has the angriest look that I have ever seen on someone's face in my life. I can tell he's straining himself with the effort of not squeezing me to death. He looks like he wants to throw something, break sh*t. His eyes are closed and he's drawing blood from his lip again. I watch as he bites his lip even harder, and I know the skin must be tearing. He doesn't even flinch at the pain and there isn't even a hint of tears in his eyes, only the things I saw in his eyes earlier, but times ten. Danger. Murder. A need for blood. I grab the paper towel from my back pocket and wipe his lip without saying anything. He doesn't even notice, he's so angry that he's not registering anything.

"Who?" Jace asks me, his voice so void of emotion that it sounds like a statement instead of a question. I feel a cold chill run up my back and I shiver, goosebumps appearing all over my legs and arms. I don't answer for a moment and he turns his head toward me, settling a cold emotionless glare on me. I sit back and look him in the face.

"B-b-both of th-them. It w-was Aaron a-and M-m-max." I finally manage to stutter out. Jace's face becomes completely unreadable, but I can tell he's angry because his hands are clenched into fists at his sides, his knuckles turning white but the tips of his fingers are red. Okay, maybe 'anger' isn't the right word. It's more like rage, or maybe furiousness.

He starts to stand up slowly, and I shuffle back a little, sort of scared of him. His eyes finally lose some of their glaze and his gaze settles on me. He must realize that I'm scared because he takes a step back and releases a breath he probably didn't even realize he was holding.

"Sh*t Lex, I..." Jace takes a deep breath before he continues, shaking his head at himself. "I'm sorry. You know how I lost my temper when we were kids? It's gotten ten times worse since Aaron sent me away." I notice that since I told Jace what happened, he stopped calling him "dad" Pfft, some 'dad' he was anyways. I hate him almost as much as Max. I wouldn't care so much if they hadn't hurt mom so much. Before Aaron left her to be with my step-wh*re, Mom used to be so happy go lucky, and she was always speaking up for herself and anyone else. She was the nicest, toughest, best mom anyone could ask for. But now... she is still the best mom anyone could ask for, but she never speaks up for herself anymore.. On that note, we should probably check if mom's okay.

Jace takes a step toward me and holds his hand out. I instinctively scoot back a little. Dark and bitter sadness rolls through my body at the flash of hurt in his eyes. Damn it Alex, you f*cktard, what are you doing? He would never hurt you. I grab his hand and pull myself up, pulling him into a hug at the same time.

"We should go." I say to him, pulling out of the hug. He gives me a small crooked smile, stepping back a step.

"Yeah, we just need to grab our stuff." Jace says to me. We walk over to the table and grab the notebook he was writing in and the napkin I used to wipe the blood off of his lip. He turns to me and sticks the notebook in his coat pocket. He steps in front of me and we walk towards the door of the cabin. We walk out, shutting the door and turning off the lights as we go. We get in the truck and Jace pulls the keys out of his pocket and I listen to them jingle.

"Wait, I left my phone in there, it must've fallen out of my pocket when I was on the floor. Let me go grab it real quick." I say to him, hopping out of the truck and jogging back to the cabin. I open the door, thankful we forgot to lock it, and look around. I see my phone sitting beside the door to the bedroom where Aaron slept when we used to stay here. Weird, I don't even remember being over here. I crouch down and grab it. I stand back up and go to turn around, knowing that Jace is waiting for me in the truck.

I take a step and hear the bedroom door creak open behind me. I turn around slowly, not scared in the slightest. I still have that taser. I take one step towards the door. My eyes widen. It's on my keychain! I stop and think about it for a second. On the one hand, whatever's in there could just be an animal or something, like a squirrel. It could also be a person, who probably would've heard the whole conversation me and Jace just had. F*ck it. Curiosity wins over logic again.

I step slowly into the room, careful not to make a sound. I haven't been in this room since I was 5 years old. The bed looks the same as it did ten years ago when... I sit on the floor and lift up the very dusty grey and light blue blanket on the bed, looking underneath the bed. There's nothing under it, so I stand up. I walk around the queen size bed and look in the bed side table. Nothing in it except an empty box of condoms and a plastic straw. Nothing in there either?

I go back to beside the door and open up the walk in closet. Aaron has long since moved all of his and mom's clothes out of the cabin. I look around in the closet and find the cord to turn the light on. I pull the chord and hear a buzz as the long unused light powered on. It's dusty af in here. I look around the closet and I don't find anything. I walk over to the cord for the light and go to turn it off. I see a glint of something in the back of the closet. I walk over to the glint and study the wall, finding a small piece of something silver in the wall. Investigating further (by investigating I mean I poked and prodded it until I realized what it was) I realized it was a little door that had been painted over.

I grab an old knife out of the kitchen and scraped away the paint. Finding a little door around 6 inches tall and 2 feet long, I open it up and found a shoe box inside. Opening it up I see a picture of Max and Aaron standing together by a restaurant I've never been to. Looking closer I realize that Aaron is passing something to Max. I suddenly realize that it's money. But for what? I lift up the stack of pictures on top and find a USB drive in the bottom. Jace honks the horn outside. I stick the USB in my shirt between my boobs and the pictures in my jacket pocket. I quickly turn the light off and rush out of the closet and bedroom, shutting both doors behind me. I stop by the front door and take one last look at the cabin before rushing out. I lock the door behind me and jump in the passenger side of the truck.

"You find it?" Jace asks me. I nod my head and pull it out of my pocket, grinning slightly. I pull my seatbelt on and click it in. Safety first. I remember what I found in the closet and grimace, disturbed by what I saw. I pull the pictures out of my pocket and hold them up.

"Boy have I got something to show you when we get home." I say to him, sliding off my jacket in the warm truck.