The wolf in the forest

The little voice inside

Chapter Five – The little voice inside.

I wake up to the feeling of someone grabbing my arm, while I hear some one desperately calling my name, but when I open my eyes, the room is empty, there is no one but me. I sit up and look around again, but still nothing. I could have sworn that there was someone here. Weird. Then suddenly there's a knock on my door. Shocked and confused, I just yell “Come on, come in”. For a second nothing, but then the door opens and Damon sticks his head in. “Are you okay? I could hear your scream from my room”. But I wasn't screaming I think to myself. I think Damon noticed my confusion and asks if he can enter. I give him my permission and tell him to come and sit on the bed with me. He looks like he doesn't know if its okay, so I assure him, that I'm all fine with him sitting on my bed. He gives me a big smile and come to sit beside me. I like him being close to me, like its comforting to have him near me. I'm not sure if he feels the same way and why would he. I'm just an insecure and weak girl who doesn't know anything about anything. But as I look up at him, I see him looking very closely at me.

“I don't think I was screaming, I was dreaming someone grabbed my arm and meanwhile I could hear someone call my name, like in a desperate way, I think that’s what woke me up” I tell him and study his reaction really close. He doesn't really have a reaction while I’m talking. Which I find strange. “I think its your wolf calling you. Your conscious mind knows now and its probably trying to reach you subconscious mind. Being a wolf its like having a soul mate inside of you, I mean its all you, but your wolf can guide you. I'm not sure how much you know, but I can feel your wolf, so I know its in there” Damon says looking down. Now I'm sure I'm sitting with a weird expression. Can he feel my wolf? Omg that’s so embarrassing, I hope he can't feel how I feel around him.

“What do you mean that you can feel my wolf?”I ask softly and remind myself that I have to do some reading to learn more about these supernatural beings.

“It is a little hard to explain, not that I don't want to, believe me I do, more than anything else, but I think its better if you discover it yourself. Your mother will be here tomorrow and I’m sure she can help you. Does that make sense?” He ask while looking deep into my eyes. I really want to know, but at the same time, I don't want him to see that side of me. I nod and he continues “I would love it if we could have an evening after tomorrow where you and I can really talk?”. Now I'm blushing, but still I’m secretly hoping he might feel just a little like I do. Maybe that’s what he meant by saying he can feel my wolf. “I think that would be nice” I answer. For a little while we just laid on the bed in silence, not like its awkward, its actually kind of nice to just relax next to him. After a while he sits up and look at me. “Are you not hungry? You've been sleeping for hours and I know its almost night time, but shouldn't we go to the kitchen and get a little bite to eat?” he ask me. “That would be really great, you know I'm always hungry” I tell him, with a sassy smile. Right away he gets up and moves to my side of the bed giving me a hand to get out. When I touch his hand, its like I feel sparks inside, warming me whole body. God, what was that? I have never felt like that before. He is such a gentle man and always so patient with me. I don't think I’ve ever met someone like him. Its strange because I don't ever really know him, but still he makes me feel safe and his very presence can comfort me. He lets me have a little time to myself in the bathroom, before we leave my room. When we get to the kitchen, I'm a little taken aback by how big it is. All the counter tops are steel, like the fridges and they have like 4 fridges. There's a island in the middle of the kitchen, where I can sit and I head towards it as soon as I can. Damon goes to the fridges and take out a lot of plates. Then he puts the plate in front of me and says “I'm not sure what you like, but there's always a lot of food here, as we often have a lot of pack members around and you know, wolves are always hungry. Maybe that's where you getting your appetite from” then he blinks at me and just laugh and I can't help but laugh with him. At least he can make some fun. We sit and eat in the kitchen for quite a while. We talk about a lot. What we like to do in the future and what our childhoods were like, it feels like we are the best of friends. We talk about our friends and he tells me about he best friend, Elijah which is also his beta and explain the beta is second in command. He tells me a lot about what the pack means to a wolf and how they are bonded by the pack. He even tells me about their ability to communicate through a telepathic bond. He is really great at explaining things to me, maybe its because I like to sit here and listening to him. After we just make some fun and laugh a lot before we head upstairs again, Him leading me to my door. But before he says goodnight and turns around, he leans in yet again and gives me a kiss on my cheek, but this time, I kiss his cheek too and I see him blushing a bit too. Then he turns and walks into his room, but he looks back and blinks at me, before closing his door.

I feel at little goofy as I walk in to my own room. God that man is not just sweet and gentle, he is starting to to consume my mind.

I jump in to the bed again, I have so many things on my mind that I can just lay here and still feel exhausted. My mind has like a million questions. But the biggest one – Who do I trust, no one is telling me everything and for some reason it still feels like there's a lot people around me isn't saying. Maybe there are thing I myself can do to find out the whole truth. I don't feel like being kept out of my own life anymore. I guess and I could get up and look around,maybe they have books about this around the house. I'm sure I saw a library downstairs earlier. I got out of bed again, I did sleep most of the evening, so it's not like I'm tiered after all.

I open my door really slowly and try my best to not make any sounds. I sneak down and find the room with glass doors and open them. Wow this library is really enormous. More than 30 cases with a least 10 shelves on each. The library looks old, but classic, with everything in dark wood, except the floor which is light wood. In the back is a staircase, I can see that there's books upstairs too. In the ceiling is a beautiful chandelier, it lights up the whole room. The must be my favorite place in this castle.

I start walking around to see what books are where. Then I spot a book, called werewolf and their abilities. This book must be the one I want, so I pull it out and walk over to the comfortable couch beside the staircase. As I open the book, I remember that I was told that I'm also a witch, so I get up and try to find a section about this. I find a book about awakening the witch inside and take it with me to the couch. I chose the wolf book first. I read and suddenly I find a chapter about the wolf inside, it says that I should have a voice inside of me, that guides me through life. But the book also says that the wolf can be bond. Some will never get free. This makes me feel sad, so I put the book down and pick the book of awakening the witch.

But I have to admit, I don't understand much in this book. I guess I have to ask my mother. I feel lost. Maybe its because I never had my mother to guide me or maybe its because of the magic I got inside, but doesn't know. This makes me more stubborn and I pick up the book again. There must be something I myself can do, I can't just sit here and wait for someone to enlighten me. I start reading a chapter about spell bond of a witch and soon I get the point, I realize soon, that my powers are being used by someone else, as the book clearly says that a witch who bond another will have door to the magic, while the witch is bond. The only thing I’m really lost about at this point is – Who is the witch who spell bond me? She or he must have been around my fathers house, as I don't think would ever let such a power go. But to my surprise the book also says that a powerful witch will have no problems in lifting this kind of spell, it even states that a witch using someones magic without consent, will be marked by darkness. As I read this, I get a little nervous – maybe magic isn't something I sound do on my own. Something in the back of my mind is telling me to stop, its like I can feel something pulling me away from the book. So I put it down again, checking the time, it says 5 am. Maybe I should just take the book upstairs and read them tomorrow, I should try to get some rest before the day starts, I know my mother will be here and though I'm so exited, I also am really nervous and a little scared that I will not measure up to what she might expect from me. My stomach is hurting with just the thought of meeting her. It's a dream I have had for so many years and I don't understand why I have so many mixed emotions. I have to out this aside and try to get through this as best as I can. I sneak upstairs again, get in to my bed and after this I drift off to dreamland.