Tainted Entropies

STUPOR.2

CONTENT WARNING: DUBCON

[Sunday. April 3. 19:53]

The first thing Kael heard was that of a panicked—almost angered voice of a woman while he was being lifted up from the ground by two pairs of hands.

And then he slipped out of consciousness yet again, dropping his head.

He jolted awake when he felt a wet, stinging sensation on his lips. Gasping, he looked around, alarmed. He almost forgot that he was at Joaquin’s place. Realising this, he sighed in relief.

“Mrs. De Leon,” he muttered as he looked at the woman who was patting a cotton ball that was doused in what smelled like alcohol on his lower lip.

“Stay still,” she said. Her brows were on a tight knit as her lips sported an awful scowl. She didn't look very pleased. “I will report this to the authorities. I’ve had enough of watching you getting beat up by your father. Joaquin, give me the landline.”

Kael shook his head, his eyes widening at what she was about to do. “Don’t, don’t! I don’t want to cause him trouble any further—”

“Well, you’re causing me trouble! And fixing you up every time this happens isn’t going to solve anything, Mikaela!” she shouted, yet her voice was that of a worried mother—ah, yes. She was one. Even to Kael, she was one.

His heart felt warm at the thought. “Thank you, Auntie, but please don’t report him. It won’t happen again.” He clasped his trembling hands and looked her in the eye, begging her not to touch the keys of the landline. “It was . . . It was my fault why he scolded me, after all. So please don’t.”

Mrs. De Leon's hand stiffened before she sighed and stood up, resting both her hands on her hips while looking down at him. “Son, look at you. You look worse than the banana I have in my kitchen. You really think this is your fault?” She shook her head in disappointment before massaging the bridge of her nose. “Very well. But if I find you again on my doorstep, looking like a dying cat, I will personally beat your father up and report him to the authorities.”

Kael bit the inside of his cheeks before nodding. “I’m sorry.”

“Sorry for what?” Javi, Joaquin’s older brother asked. “There’s nothing to be sorry about. It’s a good thing you managed to get here instead of just collapsing somewhere.” He shook his head and tossed him a fresh set of clothes that was a size larger than his own.

“So true. Go take a bath and come join us for dinner. We’re still eating, and I bet you’re hungry,” added Agna, Joaquin’s older sister. She pointed at the bathroom upstairs before leaving to go back to the dining room.

Kael pouted and stared pensively at the clothes he realised he was clutching so tightly. The sound of chattering at the dining table was so different from the chattering back at his house.

Such a happy family.

Too bad the same couldn’t be said for his.

He took a quick shower, trying to wash away the mottled bruises that littered on his tanned skin. It looked ugly. It was ugly. However, the very same bruises reminded him that he was powerless when faced with his father.

When he finished wearing the oversized shirt that barely touched his cuts and bruises, he went down to the dining area, and was surprised that most of the family members were still there, drinking and talking about Joaquin’s recent enrolment at the university.

“Stop making fun of me!” Joaquin’s cheeks were puffed as he burned glowing red in embarrassment. “It’s not as if they’ll make me wear a skirt if I study Tourism—”

“Oh, they will.” Agna teasingly wiggled her eyebrows. “And they’ll have you wear stockings, too.”

Javi roared with laughter, and almost choked on his chicken. “Oh god, this is why I hate my imagination!” He clapped his hands in amusement.

Joaquin rolled his eyes and made a face before turning to Kael, who was still standing at the entryway. He tapped the seat beside him and beckoned him to come over.

Kael acquiesced and sat before the family of four. Too bad that they were short of two people. However it didn’t make the dining table less lively than when they were six.

He thanked Mrs. De Leon and prayed by himself before starting to eat. The food was undoubtedly colder than the food back at his place, yet his insides felt warm while listening to the conversations between the siblings. He smiled throughout the meal and endured how his ribs ached from the slightest movement eating had required him to.

After they had finished, Javi took on the initiative to wash the dishes while Agna and Mrs. De Leon bid them all good night.

Joaquin and Kael were left alone in the dark living room, the soundless television illuminating their faces.

“You can sleep on my bed. I think I still have an extra mattress somewhere,” Joaquin mumbled as he finally settled down on the couch, handing Kael a bottle of alcoholic drink. “I won’t ask if you don’t want to share.”

Kael accepted the bottle and took a sip. He found it sweet—like a normal fizzing soda—that he almost forgot he was drinking an alcoholic beverage. Well, now that it all came to this, why not try to drown himself again with it?

Like he always did.

Drown away all the thoughts and shame that plagued the mind until the only thing left was sanity.

“They talked about Angelo’s last suicide attempt,” he started as he opened another bottle—really set on getting drunk by quickly ingesting vodka-infused soda.

Joaquin fell silent.

In the middle of the darkened room, he saw how Joaquin’s expression changed. “They mocked how fragile children are these days.” He scoffed and shook his head before drinking his second bottle. Surprisingly, his vision was already hazy. He shrugged before propping his arm on the armrest and resting his cheek on his palm.

“As if they know what goes on inside a person’s mind.” Joaquin shook his head before sipping on his drink.

They both fell into an almost deafening silence.

Kael worried that it was still an upsetting topic for Joaquin, and decided to lighten the mood. “This is good. How come I’ve never tasted this one? We should call Arthur.” He whipped his phone out of the oversized pockets of his shorts before ringing Arthur’s phone.

He only realised what he did when the ringing stopped, and he was greeted by a groan, followed by a: “What?”

Kael stiffened. He had forgotten that he was trying to avoid Arthur the whole day! All those efforts went down the drain just because he wanted Arthur to taste the drink.

Well, there was no going back now. “I’m at Joaquin’s. You should come over, I discovered this drink and it tastes nothing like alcohol, dude!” He chuckled to mask over his regret.

Joaquin also agreed. Cackling, he took the phone from Kael before handing him another bottle. “Man’s already tipsy from just three bottles. We’ve got some more, so how about a sleepover?”

Kael closed his eyes, feeling the thrum of his blood on his ears as he tried to calm himself. It hasn’t even been a whole twenty-four hours after he discovered that he had initiated a kiss between them and said such embarrassing things on the day of Inka’s birthday, and now he’s going to see the person!

The shame!

He would rather be eaten by the floor, but since it wasn’t possible, he could only watch as Joaquin fetched Arthur at the entrance of their house.

At least Arthur’s still clueless about it], he reminded himself. [I can still pretend it never happened, right?

He groaned in exasperation before his eyes darted to Joaquin and Arthur, who just arrived, holding a bag of chips and a few candies.

“What are you groaning like that for?” Arthur asked before plopping himself down beside Kael.

He was wearing an oversized hoodie and a thin and loose pyjama that made Kael do a double-take. Ah, oversized.

Joaquin started to talk about things that happened back at the music fest, and even promised to introduce them to this certain Juris. He claimed that they would be surprised when they finally meet the man. He only glazed over what happened during Arthur was not himself before averting the topic to a less problematic topic.

After a few drinks, Kael noticed that his tongue got looser that he babbled about anything that came to mind. Dangerous.

And while composing that thought, he didn’t realise that he had already narrated so descriptively what happened to him earlier that night. “And of course, I didn’t f*****g fight back, because that's just stupid, right? Imagine fighting back to someone who’s obviously stronger.” He scoffed before glancing at Joaquin who stood up to go to the restroom.

“Yeah. And if you fight back, you’re going to look like the f*****g villain of the story.” A sneer appeared on Arthur’s face as he bit on his peanut butter-flavoured Oreo and sipped on his drink. “I know that so well.”

Kael stared at him as the words registered. “Wait. You’ve been beaten up? I didn’t expect uncle Jakob or even Arcane—”

“Oh they would never.” He huffed before pulling up the sleeve of his hoodie.

Kael has never been more horrified in his whole entire life. Five continuous lines stretched down from Arthur's upper arm down to his forearm.

How painful it must’ve been.

“Who—auntie?” His eyes were wide as his gaze shifted rapidly from Arthur’s face and then down on his arm, and then back again. “She would never—”

“Inka.”

Ah. How the world crashed down on him. Inka? She would never. It was a lie, wasn’t it? Someone so innocent-looking could do this?

Disbelief was probably evident on his face, since Arthur pulled up his other sleeve, which revealed shorter scratches that were greater in number compared to those on the other arm.

Kael was at a loss.

“Inka . . . she did this?” He slowly shook his head, trying hard to understand how a petite woman who looked like she could never hurt a fly, do this to a six-footer meat sack.

Obviously, Arthur never fought back.

He felt nauseous that he had to open another bottle and chug it all down to calm himself.

“Surprised?” Arthur chuckled before pulling down both sleeves. “Do you now understand why I don’t like her even a bit?” A taut smile appeared on his lips.

“And yet you’re still cheating on her?” He stupidly gazed at his friend. “I don’t understand—”

“You don’t need to,” he dismissed, pulling down his sleeves. A taut smile appeared on his lips.

“Then why don’t you just break up with her?”

Arthur rolled his eyes. “f*****g hell, I would break up with her if only I could.” He groaned and tipped his head backwards, almost looking exasperated. “To be forced to endure her s**t. Who is she to even do that? I only started doing this because she doesn’t want to let go . . .” He inhaled and laughed a painful laugh under his breath. “I’ve already stooped so low. Still, I couldn’t seem to shake her off.”

“Have you tried telling your parents, then?”

Just then, a derisive smile was illuminated by the television light. “I have. So tell me, why am I still here?”

Kael shrunk back to his seat before biting his lip— “Ah!” he hissed. He forgot that there was a cut on his lip, which again started bleeding.

Arthur’s eyes widened momentarily before pulling Kael’s face closer. “Your face is full of bruises.” He realised. “Even your lips are swollen—”

Lips, huh.

Kael remembered so vividly what Arthur’s felt and tasted like. What a dangerous thought. His throat ran dry at the closeness of their faces. It was really . . .

He could feel his reason slipping away from his fingers as his heart thumped—raged inside it’s cage, wanting to be freed.

Ah. Maybe it’s the alcohol that had Kael thinking of committing such selfish misdeeds. However, to try and turn such thoughts into words and actions surprised him as much as it surprised Arthur.

“Why couldn’t it be me, instead?”

“What—” A pair of bloody lips crashed on his own as a low, pained, groan reverberated inside their mouths. From whom it came from was anyone’s guess.

Minute tremors of Arthur’s lips were felt as Kael pried his mouth open, bringing with his tongue the blood that leaked from the cut on his lip. “Can’t I?”

And it tasted just that. The rusty taste of painful yearning.

The sound of the bathroom door opening upstairs resonated in the silence of the whole house.

Arthur broke off from the kiss and stared at Kael.

Dazed.

Confused.

Footfalls were heard, indicating Joaquin’s descent to the first floor—every step harmonising with the thrumming of Kael’s pulse that sounded like his heart was beating directly inside his ears.

Arthur managed to let out an awkward chuckle as he wiped his lips with the hem of his sleeves. He shifted uncomfortably on his seat. “You’re just drunk.” He hummed. “Just drunk.”

Hearing such rejection, he chuckled mindlessly before licking his lips that remained agape.

Kael was now certain.

Only great misfortunes await those who desperately try to push their luck.