Dividends and Desires: When Asset Allocation Meets Anime Addiction
695 Words
An Nuo gulped audibly as Yuan Shenglin's smirk deepened. With every tutoring session, the heirss felt more like Little Red Riding Hood trapped with a wolf who preferred asset portfolios over grandmother disguises.
"You'd really do anything?" Yuan's fingers grazed her chin, his breath tickling her earlobe with the danger of a margin call. "Even..."
SMACK
A physics workbook landed between them with the finality of a stock market crash. "Complete these calculus problems by sundown," the wolf growled, flicking her forehead. "And lay off the anime – I'm a certified CPA, not your BL fantasy."
But my BL fantasies involve fewer derivatives! An Nuo screamed internally, her cheeks matching the red ink on last week's failed equations.
Three hours later, the heiress slammed down her pen with the triumph of Warren Buffett closing a deal. "Done! Even the partial differential equations!"
Yuan inspected her work like a hawk auditing tax returns. "Not bad, Princess. Now for your reward..." He leaned in, voice dropping to a conspiratorial whisper. "...the secret to becoming richer than your dad."
Wealth 101: A Crash Course in Capitalism
"Rule one: Assets make you money." Yuan doodled a skyscraper on her notebook. "Rule two: Liabilities suck you drier than a Black Friday sale."
An Nuo blinked. "But my penthouse..."
"Is a liability if you're the i***t paying HOA fees for a gold-plated elevator." He sketched two properties: "Property A earns ¥80k monthly rent. Property B costs ¥80k in mortgage – which is the asset?"
"The first!" She bounced like a bull market.
"Bingo." Yuan's grin turned predatory. "Now imagine buying twenty Property As while your dad's stuck with Property Bs."
"But how do I..."
"Ah-ah." His finger covered her lips. "Advanced lessons require..." The calculator between them beeped 520 (Chinese internet slang for 'I love you'). "...compound interest."
Yuan Shenglin's teachings always hit like a perfectly brewed espresso – strong, effective, and leaving you jittery for more. He wielded economic theories like a Michelin-star chef handling truffles, slicing complex concepts into bite-sized delicacies that even a spoilt heiress could digest.
An Nuo scribbled notes with the fervor of a Wall Street intern on Adderall. When she slammed her pen down triumphantly, her eyes screamed: "GIMME THE SECRET SAUCE!"
"Want the full MBA crash course?" Yuan tapped the bookshelf like a wizard summoning spirits. "The ancients weren't kidding – books do have golden houses and hot babes inside. But you gotta pick the right ones." He sipped his bubble tea with the gravitas of a philosopher king. "Reading textbooks is like eating stale bread – filling but tasteless. Real knowledge? That's the secret menu at In-N-Out Burger."
The heiress pondered this with unprecedented seriousness. For eighteen years, her life had been a never-ending VIP lounge – complete with trauma-free cushions and parental room service. But tonight, under the warm glow of anime LED lights, she experienced something revolutionary: ambition.
"Yuan," she declared like a CEO announcing stock buybacks, "I want to learn everything! I'll pay double!"
"Triple and you've got a deal." The tutor flipped open Romance of the Three Kingdoms, his eyes glazing over battle strategies. "Now answer three questions: 1) What's your life goal? 2) What resources do you have? 3) What's your..."
"Done!" An Nuo slid over her answers with a grin:
1、Professional couch potato
2、Daddy's credit card
3、Professional couch potato (retirement edition)
Yuan stared at the paper like it had grown tentacles. "Miss An, with your trust fund, you're already overqualified for goal three."
"YAAAS!" The heiress cannonballed onto her bed, scattering Pocky sticks everywhere. "Screw economics! Let's binge-watch Attack on Titan!"
"Ma'am, I'm a certified educator..."
"Tut-tor~" She singsonged, tossing him a Doritos bag. "You're getting paid to watch anime with a hot rich girl. This is capitalism at its finest!"
As the opening credits rolled, Yuan found himself dissecting Eren Yeager's leadership skills while An Nuo launched a covert operation:
"Yuan...do you hate girls with...you know..." She gestured at her chest like it was a nuclear launch code. "Big personalities?"
The tutor choked on his cola. On screen, Titans devoured soldiers. Off screen, a different kind of appetite was awakening.
- Writer
