Your Unwilling Audience

Remember Me

Chapter 2: Remember Me

***

One encounter lead to another, as they’d sit in the bar talking whenever they’d see each other there, which would be often…

In between visiting his mother and sister at the hospital and his radio show, and his own chaotic household, Allan didn’t have the leisure of rest, but whenever he’d be at the bar he had a chance to breathe a little bit and relax even if it’s just for half an hour.

“You seem to be doing good with your show. I listen to it religiously.” Richard remarked his glass half full as he swirled the liquid inside it back and forth, the ice within it slowly melting.

“I’m trying my best.” Allan sighed. “Although I could stand to have better help there than that useless intern.” He spilled venomous words as he leaned forward to rest upon the bar’s wooden surface.

“Hm? He bothering you a lot?” Richard questioned, he’d heard about that fellow once or twice. Each encounter they had, it seemed like both Allan and Richard had become comfortable enough with each other to spill their worries without being judged.

“Yeah, of course there’s no helping it. At least he’s not the worst of the lot. I’ve had much more bitter experiences with help before.” Allan remarked through a chuckle, his face was flushed a brighter shade of red as he tried to think back for a bit. He fumbled with his wallet trying to get it open until Richard stopped him.

“It’s on my tonight, don’t worry about it.” Richard remarked, it wasn’t the first time he’d paid for their drinks. Of course Allan paid his fair share as well but it seemed like it was always when the bill was higher that Richard would butt in and take it while whenever it was decently less he’d allow Allan to buy.

“I’m not broke you know…” Allan seemed a bit offended this time as the many times before.

“Did I ever say you were?” Richard asked him with a lighthearted chuckle. “I just worry you’ve drank too much to be able to count money properly.” He joked.

Allan leaned forward as he rested his head onto his arms, he looked at the man with half closed eyes. “It’s not fair you’re just born with a face like that…” he complained.

“Eh? Are you saying I’m handsome?” Richard leaned in pretending to tease him. “Am I really handsome?” He asked again while pretending to twirl with his short black hair around his finger.

“Haha… you never take anything seriously, do you?” Allan chuckled, he’d always found the man entertaining. He’d be like a breath of fresh air amongst all the trouble he was experiencing in his day to day life.

“Well, that’s not quite it.” Richard remarked his smile still bright along his face.

“Yes it is!” Allan hurried to interject, he grabbed him by the collar. “You’re always smiling and telling jokes and everyone likes you… cause you’re charming… you don’t take anything to heart… I wish I could be like that.”

“Allan…” The deep voice that sounded was slightly different than usual, it forced the half drunken man to sober up just a bit. “Just because someone is smiling doesn’t mean they’re truly happy. A smile can be a weapon but also a curse… it can show strength but also repression of your real emotions.”

“…oh…” Allan hadn’t expected that Richard would say something so deep, even his fuzzy brain was having a difficult time taking it all in.

“So don’t say you want to be like me, you’re just fine the way you are.” Richard said while patting him on the back and wrapping his arm around his shoulder pulling him in. “You’re just as entertaining pal!” He remarked praising him.

“Haha, you say that but surely you’re one of the few that think it. The radio show hasn’t been going too well rating wise.” Allan uttered.

“Maybe add a guest on your show? It always helps getting a celebrity on air.” Richard suggested with a smile as he finished his drink and placed the glass onto the counter again. “Come on, let’s get you home, I’ll have a cab pick us up.”

“Oh, you don’t need to send me off…” Allan said as he stumbled up his chair, he finished his drink quickly. “I was thinking of going for a walk and everything to sober up…”

“Is that so? Or do you just not want to go back to your place?” Richard questioned with a deeply concerned expression.

“Dad’s been on my ass lately… trying to ‘teach me how to be a man’ I don’t want to be around him if I can help it.” Allan remarked while stumbling forward, Richard held onto him.

“You can’t avoid him forever though, it would be exhausting…” Richard chimed in.

“You never know until you try.” Allan remarked smiling.

“Haha, what’s with that weird grin?” Richard chuckled wholeheartedly.

“I’m imitating you, that’s how you smile, see?” Allan had a wide smile that if it had been any wider would reach his very ears.

“No, I’m sure I don’t look like that.” Richard walked forward, the cold air outside was stinging, it hurt to even stay out for more than a millisecond. “Your coat is really thin…” He remarked watching Allan who almost always wore the same clothes with slightly varying colors of gray and black.

“It’s what I have, I aint complaining…” Allan slurred his words as he felt something being placed on his shoulders. “Man, that’s really gay, I’m not some girl that’s freezing in the cold.” He complained.

“I can’t have you die out here like a dog though can I? You’re my favorite drinking buddy, so go home safely after your walk, right?” Richard suggested while heading to his cab.

“Sure… have a good one pal…” Allan waved goodbye to his friend while heading to the direction of his house. Although he didn’t want to go in he felt too fuzzy in the head to go anywhere else. He stopped at a kid’s playground and sat at the swing. While his hands were within the coat’s pockets he noticed something. “He left his wallet with me… this is bad…” But it was too late to catch up to him. He’d have to give him a call once he was home. But he dreaded the idea of walking inside, if there was even the slightest chance his father was still awake.

“Ugh… my head…” The cold weather made it even more difficult for him to focus, it was hitting him with hard cold wind right at the back of his head. He felt like his brain would freeze. The fact he was sitting on a cold metal swing didn’t make it any better either. The screeching of going back and forth only added to his headache.

Slowly he made his way inside, instantly when entering his home he felt how warm it was, the fireplace was running and his father was sitting on the couch the same as ever sleeping. The discomfort rose again as the TV had been left turned on, it was on an annoying news segment as well. Loud enough to make his throbbing headache all the worse, Allan tried to turn off the irritating sound of the TV. When he did, his father groaned angrily.

“I was watching that.” He spoke in a low timber filled with unjustified anger.

“It was too loud.” Allan remarked as he threw the remote onto the couch.

Seconds later his father had turned on the TV once more and increased the volume. Compared to before it was Hellish. But Allan decided not to push him further while the man was half asleep. He headed to his room and sat on the ground for a bit.

He was feeling dizzy, somehow the coat he was wearing felt unnaturally warm and comforting. Unfortunately the heat of the fireplace couldn’t reach his room at the very end of the corridor, plus his cracked window that gave him a constant of cold air entering his room.

Then maybe what felt like half an hour later he heard hurried steps that woke him up from his half asleep step.

“Brother…” Serenity was at his door, she opened it quickly and then fell to her knees while crying.

“What’s the matter?” Instantly Allan jumped up seeing his sister in such a state. Her small frame shaking as she struggled to form sentences.

“Mom is very bad… she’s not getting any better… it’s been a week…” Serenity spoke through sobs and a broken voice. As Allan adjusted his vision he noticed something, bruises along his sister’s arms that were hidden by the sleeves of her blouse.

“Did he hurt you?” Allan asked while holding his sister closely, she nodded and then shook her head. “You can tell me…” He reassured her.

“I just… because I didn’t clean and cook on time… he was so angry…” Serenity continued crying, she was a girl at the age of 16, only three years younger than him but had taken on such a large burden by herself.

“Don’t worry I will help around with cleaning and cooking more…” Allan reassured her.

“No, if dad sees you he will be angry with me.” Serenity spoke carefully in a whisper like voice.

“He won’t see me, that old fart is too drunk to notice anything happening around him.” Allan smiled faintly, again imitating his dear friend, only this time his smile was filled with a quiet rage.

“I don’t know what to do until mom comes back… it’s too much…” Serenity continued crying into her brother’s arms insistently. Her reddish hair that had reached her waist fell onto the ground and rolled onto the dirty floor.

“Stand up, remember what mom always told us?” Allan asked her with a careful voice.

“You… you should smile through the pain…” Serenity recited her mother’s teachings.

“That’s right…” Allan smiled at her and patted her on top of her head.

“But… what if that pain never ends?” Serenity asked him.

“There is nothing that lasts forever, not even the good things, much less the bad.” Allan reassured her once more, he put his sister to bed that night. Then heading out he noticed the fire place’s wood had run out. His father was once more laying there in the same position as before, that man seemed to only slightly shift whenever he had to grab another beer and then still managed to go into work in the morning despite his hangover each night. An utterly deplorable man that used his status and recourses to pin his family to his side, binding them…

It was the fact he never got enough money for them to live comfortably, only giving them as much for their family not to starve to death. It was a hideous sight to see a man like that be called an exempinary father by others.

For his boisterous words at his work place where he flaunts his wife and children, no one knowing the true evil hidden beneath his mask…

Allan wanted to reveal that mask to the world if he could…