The Phoenix's Maiden

His Feeling

Arthur’s Point of View

I am really worried about Amber right now but I cannot see her, not until I can’t feel this funny feeling anymore. I can’t stop feeling like this as long as I think of her. I don’t know but when that night ended, I really can’t stop thinking about her anymore.

That night, with the moon’s sparkle, her face looked so beautiful that time. I really can’t take my eyes off her face, it’s like a magnet that has a strong force to attract me, and I really can’t get it away. Thankfully her attention is entirely pinned on the sky.

I didn’t even notice that I am looking at her until Pyro woke up from his slumber and told me to not look too much, because Amber will melt. I felt so embarrassed that time, and in my sleep, I saw her. Her face would not fade in my mind. I wonder what is this. This is the first time that I am feeling this in my heart and any other woman that I men in my entire life, this is a totally different feeling.

“Who are you thinking off master?” Pyro asked.

“Amber,” I answered and I immediately realized what I had just said, and I am startled with that. “No, I am just thinking of how is she doing right now,” I added hoping that he bites the bait.

“I understand master,” he said, what does he understand, that statement of his is so out of the blue. “I know what you are feeling right now,” he added and he look straight to me. “You are in love,” he whispered.

“WHAT?” I shouted. “N- no way!” I defended myself.

“That’s okay master, you will soon accept that feeling because all intelligent creatures that is capable of feeling had gone through the same thing and currently you are in the stage of being in denial,” he explained. I feel so annoyed that he is forcing this into me and amazed on how he could know things like this at the same time.  For the love of the almighty one, I am NOT in love with Amber.

“Stop that someone might hear you and get the wrong idea,” I said to him shushing him with his chitters.

“Will they?” he said wondering and I am feeling so annoyed right now.

“Please stop,” I begged him.

“Okay,” he said cheaply. “But I will just be right here in case that you need me for some love advice,” he added and winked at me. I just want to laugh this situation off, if I could because of how Pyro is acting today. That totally caught me off guard, I did not know that he has that side in his character. He is quick humoring things out and I did not expect that really.

He went somewhere else and I was left alone here in my room, since we just talked about her, maybe I’ll use this alone time reflecting about how I feel towards her. Just by seeing her, she makes me so self-conscious and I feel like that every move I will take should impress her. I am just being a child, am I? I don’t know what to do.

Am I really in love with her? I asked myself with that question, because honestly, I can’t really answer that with just a straight yes or no, because I don’t know the exact answer. I need to find it.

She might know the answer, if I see her this question might be answered. Sometimes I really wish that I could be a creature that has no feelings so I will not go through this stage in my life. Ahh! I grabbed my hair with both of my hands and I gently pull it, hard, so I can avoid hurting myself so much.

I am so confused right now. Is this how it feels to be in love with someone that I am not sure of? I mean Amber, has duty in this kingdom that even I can’t fathom to do. I don’t know if she feels the same way towards me. What if I am really in love with, he and she rejected my feelings? Am I ready for that? Is it painful?

So many questions unanswered and it is making my head hurt. Literally, I am having a headache right now just by thinking of it. I need to calm myself down. I guess sleeping would do... NO! That is not an option I have training later and I cannot afford to slack off any longer. I still need to perfect the secrets of my sword.

Well, I guess thinking of this would distract me away from Amber for the mean time. Where was I? Oh, I think training this move in an open area would give that enemy, so much information, enough that it could make a counter attack soon if I use this against it, but the goddess strictly told us that we should act normally, doing our usual stuff and even the worried Kamandag is currently on the patrol right now. I wonder if she already visits Amber so I could ask her how is she doing.

Oh great! Did I just think of Amber right now? When will this disappear? I need to think of something that will distract me away from Amber. Maybe on how I will unravel the secrets of Excalibur? After what happened during my fight with Pyro, it never happened again in my training. It’s just liked the usual Excalibur that don’t move on its own but I am still surprised on what happened.

The sword has chosen me they say but why am I taking too long? What if the enemy, attacked us suddenly and...? I see that time when death is in front of me. The will of me to live is powerful, maybe that’s why the sword acted on its own that time. It wanted me alive.

Should I risk my life and deliberately face death in front of his face. I mean it is only luck. I don’t know if the sword will respond to a recreated feeling and deem me worthy of saving. What if the sword didn’t do that and it just became so powerful last time? What if I die, will Amber think of me and say something specially in front of my grave?

After realizing what I just thought of, I shook my head violently for the thoughts that just came into mind right now, I really can’t stop thinking of her do I? Ah! Why Arthur? Why are you like that? Please stop thinking about her! It’s bothering my mind and heart so much.

I sensed Pyro go inside the room at the moment. I descended from my deep thinking and ready myself for more of his mind-boggling questions. I can’t stand any more of that confusion anymore.

“What do you need?” I asked him.

“Nothing,” he said in a suspicious voice that I had never heard before. Well, since we just knew each other for a short period of time, for now.

“Don’t bother me right now,” I said to him frankly.

“If that’s what you want master, then I will not,” he said still not quitting, him being suspicious, maybe I will just ignore him for now because it will just mess up my mind.

I stood up and decided to take a walk and breathe some fresh air outside and to calm my mind at the same time. I thinks this is what I needed right now. I got out of the room leaving Pyro inside the room alone. 

I didn’t know that a guardian such as him also had a playful behavior, I think they are so lonely that they had nobody to bond with. I don’t know if he’s been lonely his whole life, and I am the first one that defeated him. Man, having great prowess can be boring sometimes.

Well, good for him that he has a friend right now, I don’t know if he really sees me as his friend or just a mystic that defeated him, and forced to obey. Early on, I told him that he can free himself because I don’t really need a slave by my side but he insisted and I cannot do anything about it except to let him be.

I head outside the cave while I hold my Excalibur by my side because I decided to train for a little bit while I am outside. I have something that I want to master. Yes, and Pyro has contributed something in my battle style as he revealed something to me that will empower my attacks and I will use it kill stronger evil forces.

When I faced their leader and defeated while destroying my body at the same time, I realized that there are even more stronger opponents than him and I should be preparing myself. What I did that time will not be enough and I will end up just a burden. I am the one who is supposed to protect them and not the one who must be protected.

I am a knight and it is my duty to serve my kings and accomplish it. It is a shame on my character, that I am weak. I must be strong. Enough to defend them from the gruesome forces that aims to erase us from this world. I will not allow that.

I reached the exit of the cave and jumped through the cliff and the impact will not harm me anymore because I am at my full strength. This will not harm me. I landed safely and head to the training grounds where I can safely unleash my full potential. I still need to improve my stamina.

I will strengthen my body more, no matter how I break ever muscle fibers, crush my bones, it will build up stronger. That is what I need. To endure more pain for them. That’s is what I feel right now.

I should protect them from harm.

-The Phoenix’s Maiden-