After learning about my pregnancy, I knew and understood the hardships that a single mother faces. But to go through motherhood alone was far better than being involved with that family of monsters. Out here in the countryside, I planned on living a peaceful, quiet life with my child, away from the terrors within the city and beneath the Windsor name.
Five years later.
“Mommy!” The moment I walked through the door after a long day at work, my son ran up to me and hugged my waist.
“Hello, Oli,” I murmured to him with a sweet smile. My job was very demanding and exhausting but seeing his excitement each time I came home made it worth it.
I named my son Oliver Sterling, giving him my last name. Thankfully he looked like me; having my cinnamon-colored hair, olive skin, and bright blue eyes. The only thing that reminded me of his father was that he somewhat had his face.
“Welcome back, Ms. Sterling.” The nanny greeted me as soon as she saw me. “As usual, your son was an angel. It’s always a pleasure to look after him.”
“Thank you.” I give her my regards and pay her earnestly.
“Shall we eat?” As soon as the words left my mouth, Oliver was already dragging me to the kitchen. As I prepared his favorite meal and gave him his dish, of all the times, I got an unexpected call from work.
“I’ll be right back, I have to answer this.”
I see Oliver pout in the corner of my eye and look down at his plate. “You’re always busy with work… you never have time for me anymore.”
I felt guilt tug at my heart. He was right, I barely had time to spend with him anymore because I was working so often but bills didn't pay themselves. I just kept telling myself that I had to do what I must to give him a roof over his head and food in his stomach.
“I’m sorry, Oli. I’ll be back soon.” I give him a reassuring smile before leaving the kitchen to answer the phone.
A phone call from work late in the evening would make anybody nervous but I set aside my anxiety since I thought I was doing well for myself, only to find out that the whole place I was working at was getting shut down, leaving me jobless.
And of all the times, it was a week before my bills were due. If worse comes to worse, what would we do? Where would we go? I have no family and no friends, I have nobody to lean on for financial support.
When I returned to the kitchen to have dinner with Oliver, I kept my smile sweet and reassuring so that he didn’t suspect anything was wrong. But as soon as I put him to bed and kissed him goodnight, I returned to my bedroom and quickly got onto my laptop to look for new jobs. I didn’t have enough money to pay for the upcoming bills, especially the electric bill, and I needed money fast.
I sent out emails to multiple places where I hoped to work and get a decent paycheck but as hours went by during the night, each email I sent was responded to with a rejection.
Just as I was starting to hang my head in defeat and tears formed in my eyes made of despair, I got one last email. My laptop gave a ‘ding’ notification and my dark screen lit up.
“Who’s this?” The message came from an email full of random numbers and letters, something I could’ve sworn I never emailed. Yet again, I was so distraught when sending out dozens of emails that it could’ve been possible I messaged such a bizarre-looking email.
“I’m sorry, I must’ve messaged the wrong person.” I tried to keep my response short so that I didn’t annoy the person on the other end.
“Don’t worry about it. I was feeling lonely and had nobody to talk to anyway.” The anonymous writer’s response was delivered surprisingly quickly.
I was still waiting for multiple places to respond to my emails and had nobody else to talk to so I decided to humor the writer and distract myself from drowning in foreboding stress.
Before I could even email the stranger back, they already sent me another message.
“So what’s your name?”
I was caught a little bit off-guard by this. But it should be fine, right? For all I know this person could be on the other side of the world. It is late at night after all.
“My name is Lily.”
“You’re named after a flower? You must be a beaut’. I love lilies.”
I felt a faint burn on my cheeks. It had been a long time since I received a flirty compliment, let alone about my name. In a time like this, it made me feel good.
“What about you? What’s your name?” My question had genuine curiosity over the person who had just complimented me. By the way, they talked, I assumed it was a man.
“It’s a secret. ;)”
His response both confused and disappointed me. If he’s lonely then why would he hide his identity from me? We don’t even know each other…
I joked about him being ‘shy’ and we continued our conversation. It was pleasant, I hadn’t talked so casually with someone in a long time. It may have been because it was a stranger that I assumed was far away but it was much easier to socialize freely without worry of judgment or consequence. We talked for hours and before I realized it, it was three hours past midnight.
“Oh! It’s gotten late so fast, I should probably head to bed. My son wakes up early in the morning.” I did my best to hide my disappointment from my typed words. I secretly didn’t want to stop talking to him.
“Son, huh? Do you have a happy family?”
My enjoyment practically crashed and burned when I was reminded of Adam and my situation. Even my fingers cramped up for a second before I could force myself to type a response.
“His father isn’t in the picture.” I made my response short and sweet but my chosen words must’ve revealed the complicated hardships I face in single motherhood.
“Oh. Well, if you’re ok with it, I’d love to talk to you again tomorrow.”
His chosen words and quick response made me wonder if he was interested in me even though I just met him. Despite not knowing his name, not confirming his gender, and only knowing him for a few hours, it made me very happy to read his message.
“I’d like that… :)”
After giving each other ‘goodnight’ messages I went to bed with my heavy heart lifted, my mind rotating around the stranger who was so kind to me.
In the morning, per usual, I make Oliver some breakfast and his smile makes my day brighter. When he pointed out I had bags under my eyes I reassured him that I was fine and then checked the emails on my laptop. Half of the emails I sent didn’t respond, the other half rejected me. My world already crumbled into darkness once again.
What am I going to do?? At this rate…
I was snapped out of my stressful thoughts when I heard a knock on the door followed by Oliver’s shout, “Mom! There’s someone at the door!”
I was too overwhelmed to be confused over the fact I wasn’t expecting somebody. I should’ve looked through the window before opening the door but as soon as I did, my jaw dropped in shock when I looked up at the man that had been knocking on my door.
“Adam?!”