Love of Hers

CHAPTER 10

The relationship I have with Monique turned out to be fun. Not always s*x, but I just enjoyed being with her. She's spoiling me with everything I want. Which are foods. Wala na nga akong paki alam pag may nagsabing tumataba ako eh, but there isn't anyone yet.

She was fun to be with, kaya naman kahit free time ko napupunta sa kanya.

"Why are you making pasta? " tanong ko rito habang sumisilip sa ginagawa niya na pagmimix. I also met the person she calls manang, ang kasambahay niya na pinapapunta niya kay Cyrus pag andito ako. Siguro para maspare si manang sa kalandian ng niya.

"What's wrong with making pasta? And don't act na parang ayaw mo, I know deep inside kumukulo na ang tyan mo--" She was cut off when my stomach growled. Her eyes widened before she laughed.

"See, that's what I've been talking about! " Ani nito and leaned to placed a small kiss on my lips.

"Gutom ka na? "she whispered, her breath tickled my lips. I pecked her lips. "Kanina pa, " pag aamin ko rito. She chuckled. "That's okay, this won't be long, " ani nito at nagmix ulit.

I took that moment to hug her from behind. At first, she flinched, but then she relaxed and turned her head towards me. "Kiss me," utos nito. Hindi na ako naghintay pa at hinalikan na siya. She immediately opened her mouth to let my tongue enter her mouth, battling with hers.  I felt her hands on my neck, and mine was on her waist.

I pulled back, realizing na nagluluto pala siya. "Gutom na ako, " ani ko rito.  Nakita ko sa mga mata niya na she felt bad, kaya nagpatuloy na lamang siya sa ginagawa.

"Ikaw kasi, " she said and smiled. The innocent smile na gustong-gusto ko. So I only hugged her from behind, which she I could tell she enjoyed. Until my phone rang.

Agad ko itong sinagot nang malamang si Mama, she was asking where I am, and here I am, lying.

"Um nasa school ma, may pasok na kami within 20 minutes, " I told her, tinignan lamang ako ni Monique. She was watching me lie and I'm feeling horrible now. I kept clenching my jaw. I am not enjoying this. Nagiguilty ako.

My mother believed it and told me it was nothing and she'll tell me what she need to tell me when I get home.

The mood has changed the moment I placed my phone down. And neither of us would like to speak. It was an unspoken rule I think, siguro nagiguilty rin siya. And this relationship went longer than I expected, one day I'm gonna have to end it.

"Are you okay?" Monique came into my view.

I looked at her beautiful worried face. "Yes, " ani ko rito. She didn't seem to take it as she kept looking at me.

"I'm sorry you feel guilty, " she spoke softly. My eyes widened, she must have seen it in my face. "Are you guilty too? " I asked her. Para naman same kaming magrereflect if ever.

"No," she said in a very hard voice, the Monique I never knew. This was her. I have a philosophy of people who doesn't feel guilty when they're doing something bad. They're f*****g heartless. And I felt like Monique was one of those people.

We ate in silence after that. Monique had to bring her daughter along so it wouldn't be so quiet. Whom I was playing with silently.

Nang matapos ako, Monique insisted to bring me back to school, which I refused but she said may dadaanan siya malapit doon so it wouldn't be a bother.

We were quiet during the ride, and when we finally stopped at the side of the school Monique still didn't unlocked the door.

"Monique," tawag ko rito.

She looked at me softly before gently placing her lips on mine. "I don't feel bad for wanting you, I'm sorry, " she said, her eyes on mine and finally unlocked the door. So I left.

---

"Anong gagawin ko sa bar? Hindi naman ako umiinom," ani ko kay Red at Eris na iniinvite akong mag bar ngayon.

"Come on, chaperone ka syempre,"ani ni Red sabay tawa. "Gago!" I told her.

"Sige na naman Ariel, minsan lang to, kakatapos lang ng final term, magunwind muna tayo, "Ani ni Eris.

"Mas convincing yung kay Eris, so si Eris babantayan ko, " I said which Eris laughed about and Red groaned.

The lights were dim. And the sweaty bodies on the dance floor just disgusted me. Matapos magorder ng mga drinks ay pumunta na kami ng VIP section dahil nga mayaman si Eris.

"How's everyones love life?" Tanong ni Eris.

"Etong manok natin ang tagal sabihin kay Eve--" I cut Red off.

"Wala na akong nararamdaman sa kanya--" and she cut me off.

"Because you're seeing someone else," ani ni Red.

Agad akong nagiwas ng tingin. Which they found amusing. "Why didn't you tell us Ariel? " Tanong ni Eris.

Lumunok ako. "Wala, " ani ko rito.

"Anong wala, hinatid ka ng Bentley kanina, don't tell me may sugar daddy ka?" Red seemed like a detective interrogating me.

"Wala akong sugar daddy mga gago, " I told them.

"Then who was that person driving the Bentley? " tanong ni Red.

I licked my lips.  "I don't know how to say this, "

They all stopped and their eyes glued on me. "Sabihin mo lang gamit ang magic which we call 'words'," ani ni Eris.

"This is so embarrassing, " ani ko sa dalawa.

"It's okay, kami pa ba? Alam mo namang mas nakakahiya ang mga nangyari samin kesa sayo, " ani ni Red. Which was true, their lives are bullshit than mine.

"It was kind of a relationship but only s*x, parang f**k buddy, " Pag aamin ko sa dalawa. They didn't bulge though. And Monique and I didn't tackle about who to tell but I know its understood as secret but they're my friends and my friends are trusted and not fake.

"But now you're catching feelings?" Eris asked.

"Eww no, " agad kong sagot.

"Wag mo akong ma eww eww Ariel, ganyan karin dati kay Jade, " Ani naman ni Red.

"Basta, it's complicated, " I told them.

"But you like her?" Eris asked.

"Yes, " I do actually, maybe even more than that. But I'm scared.

"You want a real relationship with her? " Tanong ni Red.

"No, I'm fine, "ani ko rito at tumingin sa baba.

"You seem like you want to, " ani ni Eris.

"I'm having an affair with my mother's coworker, that's the right way to say that , "Ani ko sa kanilang dawala. My face exhibited sadness.

Their eyes widened.

"Oh my god," Eris reacted. "But don't get me wrong, it's nothing compared to what I've done but still, "ani nito.

"Wala tayong magagawa, but I know you know you feel bad about this, "ani ni Red.

"Yes, I'm guilty as f**k, kaya naman naisipan kong sabihin nalang na tapusin na namin, soon, " ani ko habang bumababa ang tono ng boses.

Tinignan lang nila ako, with their worried faces. "That seems tough, ilang buwan na kayo? " tanong ni Eris.

"I think 4 months," ani ko rito.

"Woah, antagal mo palang hindi sinabi saming gago ka na may kaaffair ka ano, " Red joked but Eris glared at her and I couldn't help but feel guilty again.

"Yes, 4 months na rin akong nagsisinungaling kay Mama, kaya tatapusin ko na rin, " I told them both.

"But at least ano, umabot ng apat na buwan e diba dalawang buwan lang kayo ni Jade, " ani ni Red.

Tumango ako.

"You're still not bored with this person? " tanong ni Eris. And I shook my head. Who would grow bored with Monique, she's amazing.

"Hindi ba't 2 months lang bored ka na kay Jade, tas sa taong to 4 months na kayo pero di ka parin bored hala I ship you guys, "Red found this amusing and also she's giving me the dreamy eyes na parang gusto niya i pursue ko.

"Give me the name, " ani ni Eris, which was looking so serious.

"Hey, no name dropping, " ani ko at uminom ng sprite.

"Fine, " ani ni Eris.

"But are you sure about this?" tanong ni Red.

"Yes, "

They knew that I'm feeling guilty that's why they didn't push it, and they seem to be okay with me ending it for the sake of my peace of mind. Pero ang tanong, will be able to achieve that?