Phoenix

Chapter 8

    Liam picked me up at five just like he had said he would.  I had been freaking out for the few hours before that.  I wasn’t a girlie girl.  I didn’t know how any of this worked.  What do I wear? I had thrown everything I owned around the room.  My clothes had all been magically washed again.  I didn’t have the time to worry about that right now though.  For now I was simply grateful that I had clean clothes.  I Found a pair of jeans and a t shirt and then grabbed a hoodie.  He hadn’t said how I should dress.  But I decided to do my hair. I straightened the curls out of it.  Applied what little makeup I owned.  Which consisted only of some mascara and lip gloss.  Tim knocked on the door when I was almost done. 

“Come in!” I shouted through my bathroom door.  He peeked in through the crack in the door.  

“Hey Olivia!” he smiled as he looked me over. 

“Very appropriate darling.” He commented.  I finished the last strand of hair.

 “Hey dad thanks for doing my laundry.” I said too him.  Remembering he was the reason I had clean clothes to wear at all.  I wondered where he found the time to do it.  

He laughed, “That wasn’t me, Bernice comes in four times a week to clean while your at school and I’m at work.” He said, as if it was normal. What? How had I not noticed. 

“We have a maid?’ I asked. he nodded.  Wow I had turned into a spoiled brat!  

‘Dad, I am more than capable of cleaning up after the two of us!’  I said, quite ashamed that he had felt the need to hire someone to help us out. 

He smiled, ‘I know Olivia, but I had her before so I wasn’t going to fire her and now you can focus more on studies and Liam.’ He said the last bit with a chuckle.  My face burned with heat. I don't know why I was being so shy, everyone seemed to think the Liam and I thing was a good thing. No one had said anything against it. I was lost in this thought, staring over Tim's head at the wall. I decided to confide in him. I had no idea what I was doing. 

"Dad, I've never been on a date," I squeaked out. Terrified what he would say. He looked at me through knowing eyes. 

"it's ok Olivia, Liam is going to treat you well. Be yourself, be honest with him. That is the most important part. Don't pretend with him. He's grown, he isn't going to trick you. He doesn't want to hurt you. If you tell him how innocent you are, he will be nothing but a gentleman." He finished, I nodded but I still had questions. 

"Don't men want experienced women?" I asked him, looking at my feet. 

"Boys Olivia, Boys want those kinds of girls. Liam is not a boy, he can tell that your innocent I'm sure. But don't pretend that this isn't new to you ok?" He said with intent eyes. 

"Ok." I answered quietly. He was quiet for a minute. Then he said, 

"Olivia, don't do anything that you aren't ready for ok?" I kept staring at my feet, embarrassed about this conversation. I couldn't speak. So I nodded. He patted me on the back.That’s when the door had rang.  

Tim jumped like a giddy school girl.  

‘I’ll get it, hurry up baby girl don’t keep this one waiting.’ 

I followed after him a few seconds later.  My hands were clammy and my mouth dry.  Sure I was so brave last night with two bottles of wine in my system.  But tonight, right now.  I was falling apart at the seams.  As I walked down the stairs I saw Liam.  He was standing in the foyer, wearing jeans and a hoodie too.  So I had chosen right… actually that’s all I have.  I would go clothes shopping maybe next month I had already spent so much on the evening gown which was now hanging in my closet.  The hiking gear hadn’t been cheap either.  I didn’t want to spend all of Tim’s money.  Tim patted me on the shoulder,

 ‘Olivia, about curfew,’ he said quietly.  I looked at him. 

‘Yup I will be home by eleven dad.’ I promised.  I had no intentions of breaking curfew.  The least I could do was abide by his rules.  Not like he had very many. 

He smiled, ‘It’s ok hun just let me know where you are if you stay past that ok?’ Liam piped up, 

‘Don’t worry Mr. Dawson I will have her home for eleven.’ Tim nodded and Liam held the door for me.  

We drove south for a while.  The sun was huge and bright on the horizon.  Liam drove us out onto the Loop road.  Molly Hatchet playing on the radio.  I could appreciate his taste in music.  That much I was sure.  He had brought Joe and he sat perched in the back seat his head hanging out the window. After about twenty minutes of driving we turned off the loop and headed in the direction of a large mountain.  The road took us through the suburbs. We sat in quiet. I was in the middle, with his arm around my shoulders. I felt content. I wanted to do as Tim had said, and be honest with him. But I couldn't seem to bring myself to have the conversation so I continued to sit in silent. 

    When we got right to the base of the mountain we drove past a huge and beautiful golf course.  I had yet to go golfing in Arizona.  But it seemed to be a very popular past time here.  Maybe Liam and Tim could take me? I wondered to myself.  We turned left just after the golf course entrance and began to wind our way up the mountain.  The houses quickly dispersed after we turned on to south mountain road.  We drove past two parking lots which I assumed must be for hikers.  Maybe we could hike here too one day.  Really Olivia? The only thing that you like about hiking is Liam.  I knew this was true.  I really hated hiking.  But for time with him I would do a lot of things.  We turned onto Mather drive, and took a quick helix type turn to the left again winding ever farther up.  The sun was starting to sink we had only about fourty minutes until sunset I would think.  We wound our way up the snake like road until we got to the highest peak and began to sink back down the other side.  Here there was an empty pullout.  Liam pulled into it and rounded the truck to help me out.  Then he let Joe out who went off exploring in the nearby area.  I walked to the edge of the cliff and stared out at the scene below.  The sun was touching the entire valley.  The red rocks drenched in a golden glow.  The vegetation sparse.  But for some reason the look of the desert was starting to grow on me.  I heard the tailgate thump open on the truck and looked back to see Liam rolling up the tonneau cover. I strolled over to him.  He was busying himself with something in the box.  Wow! He had out done himself.  He lifted me up into the box and jumped up behind me.  There were pillows and blankets piled in the back.  I smiled at him, 

‘Who knew you were so romantic’ I commented smiling enthusiastically. 

 ‘Love, you haven’t seen anything yet.’ He replied.  He motioned for me to sit so I did then he reached under some pillows and pulled out a basket.  Oh my god he had made me dinner to sit and eat and watch the sunset? 

‘Wow Liam, this is amazing.’ I said.  He smiled and sat next to me.  From inside the picnic basket he pulled a bottle of my favorite champagne and two wine glasses.  He poured us both a glass.  His a lot smaller than mine.  I sipped it while he pulled out dinner.  In the basking light of the sun that had slowly began turning pink and began to dip below the mountains to the east we ate a delicious dinner.  I was quiet.  Shy after my assault on him last night.  I took a huge gulp of wine trying to find my bravery.  

“Olivia, don’t drink so fast.” He said quietly.  I nodded knowing that he was right I shouldn’t.  I would just attack him again.  

“I’m sorry.” I said, “I’m just feeling a bit shy.”  I looked down at my hands the red flush sweeping across my face.  

“Why?” He asked as though he had no idea why I was so embarrassed.  

“Because, I attacked you like some kind of floozy last night.” I said quickly.  He started to laugh.  Why in the hell are you laughing I wondered almost angry.  

“You are not a floozy Olivia.  And believe me I didn’t mind in the slightest.  You can attack me anytime.  But if you keep drinking like you are I am going to have to drag you home drunk to your dad.” He said laughing.  I nodded, knowing that he was right.  I would slow down.  He struck up a casual conversation trying to ease the awkward moment.  We talked about simple things.  How I liked Arizona, if I missed Vancouver.  Then slowly we moved onto our future plans.  

‘Well I want to finish school and then before I get busy working I want to do some travelling’ I said, He smiled when I said that, 

‘What kind of travelling Olivia?’ He asked before taking another bite of spaghetti.  

‘I don’t really think there is anywhere that I don’t want to go.  I want to go to europe, Asia, the Caribbean.  Hawaii, travel the states.  I haven’t been that many places at all’ I said. He nodded.  

‘I would love to travel when it doesn’t include being at war,’ he commented. My face sunk a little bit,  I hoped he wouldn’t notice.  But I was honestly scared about the fact that he went to war like that. 

‘What?’ He asked me.  I looked down at my knees. 

‘Olivia, what’s wrong?’ I sighed, 

‘It’s just sad and scary to me that you go to war.’ He smiled, 

‘It’s not sad love, It’s a necessity I do it for the country, the honor, the freedom.  I do it, for people like you and now that you’re in my life I want to do it even more.’ So noble, always so noble.  

‘Are you going to have to go on tour again?’ I asked him. He nodded, 

‘Yes, probably in the spring and then one more after that before I will be as high in command as I want to ask for a permanent position somewhere.’ I took a bite of spaghetti to give me an opportunity to think.  I chewed my food, pondering my next question. 

‘I’m going to worry about you.’  I said quietly.  He nodded, 

‘That’s why I’ve never formed important relationships outside of my family and fellow troops.  I don’t want to have people worrying about me. I don't want you to worry about me.’  He said, and then added, “Maybe when I am done touring and you are done school we can travel together?”  

‘I like that idea a lot Liam.  But Liam, it has to be lonely?’ I asked, I hoped he would catch onto what I meant.  He smiled, 

‘I said, important relationships.’ He laughed, ‘But I did have flings Olivia, I can’t lie to you about that.’ I looked at my plate playing with my food.  Oh my god, I’m not ready for this conversation. I wanted to know how many women. How many flings. I didn't ask though. He started answering me without question.

‘I might be old fashioned, but I am still a man. Our relationship is already way different than the relationships I had with those women.’ he said, matter of factly. I nodded, twirling some spaghetti on my plate.  This was going to make me jealous. But I had to know the answer.

 ‘How many women?’ I asked, I only asked because I should know this for health reasons not because I wanted to hunt them down or at least thats what I told myself.  Though maybe hunting them down was a good idea too. The thought of any women touching him made my skin burn.  

‘Twelve, including my high school girlfriend.’ He answered.  I nodded, ok it could be worse, it could have been seventy.  Or seven hundred.  He is a marine, I’d been told they were bad asses.  I put the spaghetti in my mouth and continued to stare at my plate. 

‘Olivia?’ He asked tentatively.  I couldn’t look at him. 

‘Twelve isn’t bad.’ I answered,  He sighed, 

‘I’ve been tested.  I have regular medical physicals for my job. It’s been a long time since I’ve been with anyone.’ I nodded again.  The silence between us got awkward.  I looked at the sunset.  It was bright and beautiful, the valley below us lit up and gorgeous.  I leaned my head over on his shoulder, 

‘Liam’ I said, I had to be honest. Tim said it too, I had already known it in my heart.

‘Hmm?’ He asked. I sighed.  The sunset mesmerizing my mind. I had to tell him.  He was being honest with me. Time to be honest with him. 

‘My number is zero.’ He didn’t breath for a second.  He threw his arm around my shoulder.  

‘Zero?’  He asked. I nodded.  

‘Wow.”  He said quietly.

"It's not a big deal. If you don't want anything to do with me now I get it." I said, embarrassed. He tipped my chin up pecked me on the mouth and said, 

“Don't you dare talk like that. How is it even possible that no one has beaten me to you?” He asked me sincerely.  I didn’t know exactly what he meant and was rather confused.  I just looked at him.  

“I mean look at you Olivia.  You are gorgeous.” He said running a finger down my chin.

"No I'm not.." I started, but he cut me off. 

"Don't start that, you are beautiful, you have no idea how you make me feel." He said, holding me tight. 

"God, the things you do to me woman." He breathed into my hair. 

“I knew you were rather innocent but I had no idea that you were quite that innocent.”  He said stroking my jaw bone as he stared deep into my eyes.  I still couldn't speak. 

“God Olivia, you sure make me feel like an old man.”  He said,  Then as the last rays of the sun went down he melded his mouth to mine.  I wrapped my arms around his muscled and perfect shoulders.  He wound his arms around my waist and pulled me close.  The darkness falling around us.  My brain was whirling, she had given up on deciding that Liam didn’t want me.  My heart was asking, is now the perfect time? Then he released me and smiled.  Guess not. I felt deflated for a minute but then he refilled my wine.  Oh good, that means we aren’t leaving yet. I wanted to ask him about the women that he had been with.  He sensed that I was wondering something. He nudged me, 

‘ask me love.’  He said, I took a nervous breath, 

‘Tell me about the twelve please.’ he tensed a little probably anticipating a fight.  But I made a silent oath to listen and not judge it was not my place to know any of this yet. Then he began to talk, 

‘Well the first was my high school girlfriend Blake, that was in grade eleven.  We had been together for four years before anything happened. The second was in military school, we were just lonely.  We had a casual relationship for about a year, before she found someone she loved and moved on to get married. Numbers three through seven were one night stands I’m not particularly proud of those.” He stopped and sipped his wine and then continued.  

“It get’s lonely on the road.  Number eight I had just got home and had a whirlwind fling with another troop.  That lasted about a month.  Then I got re deployed.”  I Stopped him there.  

“You have been with a man?” I asked seriously stunned.  He almost choked on a mouthful of wine. 

“No Olivia, I have not been with a man.  I have however, been with a female troop.”  He said sounding a little flabbergasted. I chuckled, 

"Oops." He smiled at me but then he continued on his story.   

“Anyway that would be numbers 9 through eleven.  More one night stands, just being lonely.  Number twelve was two years ago.  Blake and I got back together for about six months before she cheated on me and that ended our friendship forever. That’s about it.’ He said quietly. 

‘Liam that’s eleven not twelve.’ I said.  He smiled, 

‘I know but she had been with other people since we were first together so I count it as twelve.’ He said with candor.  I nodded, ok whatever but it’s eleven then that way I don’t have to worry about twelve.  Sounds like Blake was the only important one.  But at his age I couldn’t expect him to have no one on his list.  I wondered about the lonely on the road thing. 

 ‘When you say it’s lonely on the road?” I let the question ask itself.  He smiled, 

‘I may have said that wrong, I would never cheat, I was with Blake my first tour and I didn’t touch anyone else.’ He answered simply.  I smiled, ok this was good. 

 ‘Olivia,’ I looked at him. ‘I don’t expect anything from you. You are in control of anything that happens.  I will be fine with your number remaining zero ok?’ He asked. I nodded.  

‘If I ever push you to far just say no.’ I nodded again.  He pecked me on the mouth. I noticed briefly that he had a ring on his right hand.  With a big red stone in it. I had never noticed it before.  

He packed up the picnic basket and stuffed it back at the top of the box, then he said, 

‘wait here’ and he dropped to the ground.  A few seconds later music began playing from the cab.  He climbed back into the box with me.  Held his hand out to me and helped me up.  There in the box of his truck under the appearing stars of the Arizona sky we danced.  Every breath you take playing softly in the back ground.  He held me close as we swayed together to the beat of The Police.  I love this song.  I thought to myself.  His head dropped down onto my shoulder. His arms sliding up my back and pulling me tight.  It was at that moment that I realized I was in love.  I loved this man.  I didn’t know him near long enough to be able to say that but I felt it.  I wanted to be number 13.  The funny thing was, 13 was most peoples unlucky number. Yet I thought of it as lucky. I wanted to be the last woman I thought.  When the song was over and Slow hand by the pointer sisters came on we continued our dance.  The scent of him filled my nostrils, musky and all man.  His muscles filled my hands.  With him I was finding myself less and less self conscious.  More comfortable in his presence.  We finished the song and then he piled the blankets and pillows into a huge comfy looking bed.  He sat and motioned me to sit in front of him.  I sat and leaned back against him.  The stars above us had exploded.  There was far too much light pollution in the valley to see any stars.  This is why he brought me way up here.  Joe jumped up into the box and laid at our feet while we gazed into space.  The eighties mix still forming a back ground noise.  He kissed my hair as a shooting star flashed over head. 

‘Make a wish love,’ He whispered in my ear.  I wish that I will always have this man in my life.  I said in my mind. 

‘The stars are so beautiful up here Liam,’ I said to him.  I felt him smile into my hair.  

‘’Olivia, I’m not even interested in the stars when you’re around.’ He answered. Oh my god I wasn’t even standing but I felt my knees get weak.  I looked into the abyss of the night sky.  I was literally looking into the universe.  I wish that I knew some of the constellations.  

‘Liam,’ I asked him softly.  He yawned, 

‘Hmmm?’ He answered.  

‘Do you know any constellations?’ I felt him smile into my head again.  He pulled one of the blankets over us.  

‘Sure do, which one do you want to see?’ He asked.  I shook my head, 

‘I don’t know any of them.’ 

‘Well, that over there is Venus.’ He said pointing to a bright star.  

‘That one over the is the Ursa minor, and just below it is Ursa Major.’  He showed me constellations for the next 3 hours.  Periodically filling up my wine glass until the bottle was gone.  When I finished my glass I set it to the side.  Sat up and turned to face him.  Too much wine again Olivia.  I thought to myself.  But the liquid courage pulsing through my veins made me completely fearless.  I swung a leg over him.  The wine making me brave.  The atmosphere making it easy.  His hands went to my hips.  I leaned down and pressed my lips to his.  He welcomed me with his mouth.  His lips soft yet firm, his breath steady but fast.  My heart was pounding in my ears.  I let my hands move from his shoulders and down his chest. I pulled his hoodie and t shirt over his head.  He never stopped me so I placed my hands splayed across his bare chest.   It was so hard.  

"Oh my god Liam," I moaned into his mouth. He smiled, pushed me up so that he can look at me. 

"You ok?" He asked me. I nodded at him. 

"Olivia, we can go as far as you want. When you want to stop, you stop. Doesn't matter what point ok?" I nodded again. Then I explored his torso with my hands while his mouth explored mine.  I followed the shape of his hard pecs down to where  they joined with his sternum.  Then I ran my hands down his rock hard abs.  Each one protruding from his stomach like little mountains. I moaned into his mouth again, the pulsing in my body getting stronger and stronger.  My hands moved to the tops of his jeans and then side to his hips.  Oh my god, he has that little y shaped muscle on his hips.  I nearly convulsed.  His hands were still on my hips holding me in place.  His mouth was kissing along my jawline now.  

‘Liam’, I whispered.  He moaned, 

‘Yes love?’ Into my mouth. 

‘Why is your body so perfect?’ I asked.  He chuckled, 

‘I work out a lot dear, your body is more perfect than mine.’ I pulled away from his mouth and laughed.  He looked at me like I was crazy, 

‘What is so funny?’ He asked me, I looked at him with complete sincerity. 

‘My body is the farthest thing from perfect, my thighs jiggle, my arms jiggle, my stomach is flabby, and I’m about thirty pounds overweight.’  I tried to look down but he held my chin up. 

‘Olivia, please don’t judge yourself that way, you’re beautiful. Inside and out.’ He said.  Then he flipped me onto my back and kissed my arms, ‘perfect.’ He kissed my collar bone, and before I knew what he was doing he had lifted my shirt and was blowing a raspberry on my belly. I panicked, oh my god, get away from my stomach it’s gross.  I tried to pull away, but he slowly turned the raspberry into a kiss, keeping my hips pinned.  He plastered my stomach with sweet little kisses. The he put his chin onto my abdomen and whispered, 

‘you are perfect, no one wants a woman made of stone Love.  and..... " He stalled, my stomach fluttered in anticipation.

"It’s time to get you home.’ he smiled. Oh I don’t want to go home.  I want to stay here forever.  He sat up pulling me with him. Then he pulled his hoodie back on.  Oh what a shame to cover those muscles.  I noticed him try and slyly adjust the crotch of his pants and I smiled into the crook of my elbow feigning a yawn.  I was the reason for that large bulge I thought to myself.  I had never turned a man on before. It was quite the ego boost. 

    He jumped down from the truck and then helped me down. Then helped me up into the cab. Loading Joe into the passenger seat. 

  At 10:48 we were standing in front of my house.  I tried to throw myself into his arms.  My mind had visions of my convincing him to take me home.  Have him make love to me all night.  But he held me at arms length. 

“Oh god Olivia, no.” He said.  Ouch, I guess maybe I didn’t turn him on I decided.  

“My body cannot hold you off much longer if you keep doing that.”  He whispered into my hair pulling me in for a hug.  

“Then don’t hold me off.” I replied.  He smiled against my temple.  

“Not yet, let’s take this slow ok?” He asked.  I nodded knowing that once again he was right.  Maybe having an older boyfriend wouldn’t be so bad.  Boyfriend? I thought to myself.  We never discussed that.  I guess right now we are just friends.  He gave me a peck on the cheek and whispered. 

“Good night Olivia.” As he turned and walked home.