Possibility Days

Chapter 3

THREE

The day before she left for Paris, London visited me. “You need to make a clean break from Angelina Ferria; I’m already a much better agent.”

Shauna ran out to the living room. “London’s here!” It was around noon, but ever since Diego left, she took to running around the house like a rat in a maze.

London pulled Shauna onto her lap. “Aren’t you just a little ball of energy?” London looked back to me and Jen. “I’m going to cut to the chase—I want you to come to Japan with me.”

“Aren’t you going to Paris?” I asked, scratching my chest as I lay on the couch with my head in my sleeping wife’s lap. I couldn’t feel less like a model that morning. I was still wearing sweatpants with no shirt since I hadn’t any reason to put clothes on until London showed up.

“Paris isn’t for long. After that, I have a six-month gig in Japan. I cannot fathom not seeing you or this little cutie for six whole months.”

Jen was starting to open her eyes. “Huh?”

“You’re invited as well, Jen. I’m not trying to kidnap your family.”

“Invited where?” Jen asked.

“Japan! In three weeks!”

“One, it’s too early for shouting,” Jen groaned. “And two, we need to talk to Sara and Johnny. Can you come later?”

“Sure. My flight doesn’t leave until tomorrow morning,” London said as she put Shauna back on the floor.

She returned at eleven, wearing a black cocktail dress as if she’d just come from somewhere important. She made coffee as she watched Shauna run around the house with a roll of toilet paper streaming behind her like a giant ribbon. “How long’s she been doing that?”

Jen grumbled into her palms. “Four hours.”

Johnny burst through the door. “I found a guitar!”

Sara rolled her eyes as she followed him in. “Johnny found it in a dumpster near the tattoo shop.”

He grabbed a chair. “It’s perfectly good. Waste not, want not. I had to leave my guitar behind to come to Los Angeles.” He strummed a few chords and played some nursery rhyme from memory. It was a nice gesture, but not enough to hold Shauna’s attention.

“Will Daddy sing?” Shauna asked.

“Daddy can’t sing,” I quickly replied.

“Have you ever tried?” London asked, reaching her hands out for Johnny’s guitar. Once settled, she strummed with just her fingers, ignoring the plectrum Johnny was holding out. “Won’t you sing me a sad song …” Her voice was hauntingly beautiful. “Baby, make it good a long, make me cry, make me cry, make me cry.”

Shauna sat with a pouty face. “Grandpa sang happy songs.”

“Okay, let’s try something else. Sing with me, Dakota.” She started to play a slow ballad version of “Amazing Grace”. “… how sweet the sound, that saved a wraith like me …”

“… I once was lost, but now I’m found,” I sang, only to Shauna, “was blind but now I see.”

Shauna clapped her hands. “Daddy sings better than Grandpa.”

London put down the guitar and checked the kitchen wall clock. “Now, let me get straight to the point. I want to take Sean, Jen, and this little cutie to Japan.”

“What about me and Johnny?” Sara asked.

Johnny glared across at her. “We’re not following Sean and Jen to Japan.”

Sara went quiet.

“We can visit,” he went on, more calmly, “but the sooner you finish your degree, the sooner you can land a residency.”

“It’s fine,” Sara growled at him. She turned to London, pouting. “I just want Sean to be safe. Will he be able to get his medications? What about his medical equipment?”

“They’ll live with me,” London answered. “As for medical care, there are American hospitals throughout the world, even military bases. We’ll be covered. Don’t worry. Sean just needs to get copies of his medical records to travel with.”

Sara bit her lip, glancing from London to me. “Sean, I’ll miss you.

“You and Johnny can stay on in the condo,” London assured. “You’re blasting through school—you’ll have UCLA in your rearview in no time.”

“Yeah, I guess,” Sara replied.

It was official. I was going to Japan.

The next day, my family and I got passport photos. I looked up how to print the application online and paid for expedited processing. Then I took a taxi to Angelina Ferria’s office. I could have gotten a ride from Jen, but I needed to be alone for this conversation. I stopped to buy a bottle of water and a cheap bouquet of yellow roses. When I finally arrived, I knocked on her door.

“Come in,” she called. I walked in to find her on the phone. She waved to the seat opposite her desk. “I have to call you back, a stray animal just snuck in my office.”

“Really?” I chuckled as she hung up the phone.

“I tell it like it is.”

“So, we’re back to the issue of my hair?”

Angelina gave me a tight smile. “A little bird told me you’re going to Japan.”

“Was that little bird London herself? I told her what you called me.”

“That was unnecessary. And what she called me was quite rude and unprofessional.”

Yeah, about as professional as you’ve been for the past couple years. “I can imagine.’”

“Why are you even here?”

I placed the flowers on her desk as if on a grave. “Only to thank you. You suck at being an agent, but you gave me the courage to try.”

Angelina plucked my contract from the top of a pile of papers and tore it in half. She handed me the pieces. “No hard feelings.”

“I love you too.”

Breaking up with Angelina Ferria turned out to be simple. But taking a temporary break from my primary care doctor would not be as easy.

When I called the appointment line for the next available appointment with Dr. Elise Chan, there was a pause.

“Is this regarding a life-threatening situation?” the receptionist asked.

I was getting nervous. What if I couldn’t get through to Dr. Chan herself? “No, or I would be in the emergency room.”

“What is this regarding, then?”

“I need access to my medical records because I’m moving to Japan for six months.”

“Please hold,” she replied. The classical hold music sounded like it had been played on a child’s keyboard. Luckily it didn’t last long.

“Hello, Sean,” said Dr. Chan. “What’s this I hear about Japan?”

I took a deep breath. The last thing I needed was a coughing attack. “I’m moving to Japan for six months. All I need is access to my notes and my medications.”

Dr. Chan sighed. “Your medications have been adjusted ten times since I’ve started working with you.”

“And I’ve been fine.”

“You’ve been lucky. Do you even have a primary health care provider arranged in Japan?”

“I don’t need a primary health care provider, all I need is access to my medications—I can take care of myself.” By that I of course meant that I’d rely on London to get me access to a doctor in the event I needed one, but I’d lived with my condition for twenty years. I knew what it took to keep my body healthy.

“It’s a big risk, Sean.”

“I’m in the best shape I’ve ever been.”

“What are your mother’s thoughts? After all, she’s the one paying for your care.”

I was livid. “I’m twenty years old!”

“I’m uncomfortable not having her written permission to support your travels.”

“You don’t need her permission. I’m just asking for the files, and for on-hand meds to take with me.”

“Oh, I’m happy to send your files. Most of them have been digitized already. But I want to speak to your mom before I authorize a bulk prescription.”

Damn it, no! Mom will blockade me at the frickin’ airport if she finds out. I struggled to keep my voice level. “I’m leaving in a few days. I can’t wait for you to get clearance before giving me what I need to get out of the country.”

“Like I say, I should really speak to your—”

“If you say anything to her, I’ll sue you.” The second I hung up the phone, I knew I’d probably shot myself in the foot. I stomped around the bedroom, wanting to kick things. Threatening Dr. Chan was a dumb move, but she and my mom were worse than a secret cabal when it came to stopping me from trying anything new.

This could be my only chance to travel with my wife and daughter, and I wasn’t about to let anything get in the way of me having a shot at Japan.

I shot London a text, hoping she would be hooked into the local wireless. “L, I have a huge problem. Dr. C will not release meds or prescription refills until she’s spoken to my mom.”

“OMG annoying!” She replied almost straightaway. “Don’t stress though.”

“How do I not stress?” I replied, having to correct myself every third letter. I was too mad to type straight.

“You just need insurance, and someone to sign their name on a piece of paper if you get sick. Trust me. I can find someone to do that.”

I breathed a sigh of relief. “Thanks, L.”

“No problem. I can’t wait to see little Shauna’s passport photo,” she replied, along with a with a smiley face.

Everything was in place; we would be off to Japan.

The day we left, we had to battle through reporters at LAX. Apparently, every entertainment news media outlet wanted to know why London was taking my family to Japan with her. I would have loved the publicity, but we couldn’t risk missing the flight. Unlike her sisters, London did not own a private plane. The flight was long but comfortable in first class. I had an outlet for my BiPAP, and with the seat divider up, I slept with Shauna in my arms. London and Jen took the row across.

London’s condo was on the thirtieth floor of a massive high-rise. Not quite at the top, not the largest unit in the building, but still impressive.

Jen was looking out the massive windows with a childlike sense of wonder. Seattle was not Tokyo, Los Angeles was not Tokyo, and Indigo North Dakota was sure as hell not Tokyo. What Jen saw in the unlit morning was beyond her wildest dreams. She kept catching my eye, giggling.

London smiled happily. “I’ll let you unpack and then I can give you all the grand tour.”

We unpacked after London’s house tour and Jen finally found sleep. I tucked her in, then took out my phone. “Do you have Wi-Fi?”

“Sure, router’s in the closet. But you can just use my computer.”

I checked my email. Sure enough, there was a message from Sara. “Mom found out. Very pissed! Don’t worry, I got your back. Love always, Sara.”

I sent a reply to let her know I’d arrived safely and that I’d give Mom a call. I was already on the other side of the globe; what was the worst that could happen?

“London, can I make a call to the States?”

“Sure, use any landline.”

I paid no mind to the time difference. If my mother was asleep or at work, I’d just leave a message. In fact, I would have preferred it that way, but angry moms never rest.

She picked up on the first ring. “Sean?”

“Hi Mommy,” I said in my sweetest voice. “Guess where I am.”

“You’re in Japan,” she said in a tone that reflected her irritation and disappointment in my life choices.

I booted up a link I’d saved on my email especially for this conversation. “Yes, I’m in Japan with my family, and we’re staying at the home of my mentor. We’re not slumming it.”

“And what about your cystic fibrosis?”

The web page loaded up and I found the third paragraph of the article, reading it aloud. “Japan used to have serious air-pollution issues due to industrialization, but thanks to strict laws and public awareness of environmental issues, air pollution in Japan has gone way d—”

“Oh, grow up.” Mom wasn’t laughing. “I just want you and your family to be safe. You’re traveling with a small child—”

“Shauna, come say hello to Grandma Claire,” I said quickly, knowing she would come and be too adorable for Mom to stay mad. As I handed off the phone, London brought me a snack-size bag of chocolate-covered edamame beans.

“Read up on the product for the commercial we’re shooting later this week.” She fished out a pamphlet describing the corporate mission statement of Machete Cocoa.

My eyes lit up. “Are you serious?”

“Can I ask why you’re so obsessed with chocolate?”

I shrugged. “It was the one food I could get in the hospital that always tasted good, no matter what form it came in—cake, pudding, holiday candy, even candy snuck in from the vending machines.” In that moment I felt transported back to innocent childhood. “Chocolate is happiness.”

The commercial would be shot completely on green screen, and unfortunately for Jen and Shauna, the director insisted on a closed set.

“It’s just going to be so crowded,” London apologized to Jen as we all ate protein bars for breakfast. It was six in the morning. London was the only one who’d woken up properly. “You should take Shauna to the Hello Kitty store,” she suggested.

Jen and Shauna locked eyes, grinning. I was glad they had their day all planned out already.

On set London and I were dressed in leather, looking like a hot American biker couple who liked chocolate the way some people enjoyed ecstasy or LSD. London’s long black hair was in a bun, like a ballerina’s, in contrast to my long blonde waves that hung loosely down my back. We walked through a fake nightclub filled with hot Japanese models, each offering us squares of chocolate like vampires trying to seduce us away from each other. In total, we had three interaction shots each, but each shot took ten or more tries to get right.

London had a trick of taking the candy in her mouth then spitting it out at the end of the take. But I loved candy too much to do that.

Even so, I managed to remain professional and successfully complete the shoot, looking strong, seductive, and very much in love with London. I certainly loved London enough to make it to the bathroom before vomiting.

London followed to hold back my hair. “You know, now that the shoot’s over, you can eat as much chocolate as you want.”

“I’ll take it to go,” I said in between heaves.

I wasn’t even kidding.