THE PRICE OF VENGEANCE

chapter 3

TRYING TOO HARD

Isabella's point of view

"Mrs Hayes? This is the medical center's Dr. Martinez. We need to talk about last week's test results.

My fingers whitened as my second hand tightened its hold on the phone. It seems like a year ago. Nothing out of the ordinary; I had gone in for my routine checkup. My generation's women were expected to have done the typical things. After drawing some blood, the doctor instructed me to call them if I had not heard back from them in a few days.

I told him, "I am sorry, but there has to be some mistake," in a voice that was almost audible above a whisper. "I am all right. I have not been ill at all. Even to my own ears, the words seemed false. Lately, I have been drowsier than normal. But did not everyone become exhausted from time to time?

Dr. Martinez added softly, "Mrs. Hayes, I would like you to come tomorrow morning and we can talk about this personally." "Is it possible for you to arrive at 10 o'clock? Additionally, if you do not mind, come with your husband”. Come with your husband. As if David would simply stop whatever he was doing to follow me. As if David were no longer concerned about my fate.

I sat staring at the phone for hours as I left it hanging. The loud ticking of the kitchen clock marked the passing of the ordinary hours of my life. Perhaps nothing would be ordinary tomorrow. Perhaps everything was about to change in ways I could not even understand.

But, I had to start over tonight. I had to tell myself tonight that my marriage was still worth preserving. I ignored the doctor's call and concentrated on the one thing I was still capable of doing. I would prepare David's meals. I would remind him of the reason for our marriage.

I made an effort to visit the pricey, double-priced food store downtown. Every time we went out on the town, David would order the thick cut of steak, which was his favorite. He adored the sauce made with heavy cream and fresh mushrooms. They were lovely, small new potatoes. A red wine that was more expensive than the weekly groceries I bought.

I thoroughly cleaned the dining room inside the house. I set out the plates we had chosen together as a couple, when we were foolish and young. The excellent silverware was wrapped in its felt-lined holder and concealed at the back of the drawer. Tonight has to be just so.

I cooked for two hours. The steaks needed to be perfectly prepared, not too raw or overcooked. The sauce needed to be smooth and creamy. They needed to be golden brown potatoes. My hands were shaking as I cooked, but I forced myself to keep going. Everything was going to be fine with this meal. It just had to.

I played calming music on the stereo and lit six candles. David used to tell me that the black dress I wore made my eyes look wonderful. I applied lipstick and curled my hair but couldn't help but feel as if I was handing out clothes for someone else's life. I saw a glimpse of a woman so desperate to do whatever it took to save her marriage staring at myself in the mirror. Seven came and went. Then eight. Candles burned less warmly. The oven had warmed the food. I checked my phone every few minutes as I waited in the dining room. No calls. No messages. The quiet and smell of food only.

I heard David's truck pull into the driveway at eight thirty. Anticipating the first date made my heart race like when I was sixteen again. I rehearsed my smile and ironed out my clothes. I said to myself, "Hey honey, I have prepared your favorite." "I thought that we could have a good night together."

David appeared as though he was about to pass out when he opened the front door. He was disheveled in his clothes and his tie was loose. When he entered the dining room and noticed me sitting there in my evening dress with a cold meal out, he froze. Something crossed his face for a second. Surprise? Sympathy? I had no idea.

"What is on tonight?" His voice sounded unhappy as he growled. It seemed as though something was wrong with me because it was a cross one. As if cooking dinner for my own husband was against the law.

I jumped up too quickly and said, "I prepared your favorite," The sound of my chair groaning on the floor reverberated throughout the still home. "Gravy steak with mushrooms. as well as the small potatoes you enjoy. Tonight, I thought we could have dinner together.

David stood up without looking at me, walked over to the table, and sat down. My hands shaking, I poured the sauce over his steak and placed his plate in front of him. As in the cookbooks, it was stunning. David, meanwhile, regarded it as though it were a dish from another planet.

We did not talk as we ate. As though eating were an endurance test, David chewed his steak carefully and broke it up into little pieces. Regarding the food, he said nothing. He remained silent. I thought about commenting, but all the subjects looked dangerous. Work? He would make a grunt. The climate? Foolish. What are we going to do this weekend? We did not have any.

I stopped after taking three bites. My lips tasted like cardboard from the food. Wine did not sit well with me. As I sat there, I watched David devour my delicious dinner as though he were dining by himself at his computer rather than with his wife, who had put in endless hours to please him.

After eating, David got up and went to the door. He snarled, "Thanks for dinner," without even looking at me. They were the right words, but they were meaningless, like something he could say to a restaurant waitress.

I shouted after him, "David, wait," but he had already vanished. The gentle click of his office room door closing was followed by the distant thud of his footsteps on the stairs. Just closing, not shutting. Finally, quietly.

I sat by myself at our lovely table with its dainty candles and exquisite dinner plates. My lovely night was stolen before it had time to start. No matter how much I worked, how much I anticipated it, how much effort I put into it, David had pushed me into the background and consumed my love like an hors d'oeuvre.

In the dark, I wiped the table clean. I washed the fine dishes and placed them in their box. I shut off the music and blew out the candles. An hour passed and nothing indicated the time that I had spent attempting to save my marriage.

At some point, I was set on knocking on the door of David's office, but I did not. I was stuck for hours outside the hallway, trying to knock. I am trying to make sense of what went wrong. trying to make sense of why he lost his love for me. But I did not knock. All I could do was just stand there in our own home like a ghost.

Still wearing my black dress, I slept alone. I was too tired to wash my face and take off my clothes. When David moved away from me, I tried to rub the scratch of his chair off and pulled the blankets over my head.

On the nightstand, my phone buzzed. A message in the shadows. I thought it was David, messaging me from his office upstairs, for a crazy moment. Maybe he would be saying sorry. Maybe he would see how hard I worked.

But, Sophia's name was flashing on the screen of his phone again as I picked it up.

"Your assistance with the assignment tonight is invaluable, David! You completed the math for the boys. It is a pleasure working with them.