You’re beautiful

Pep talk

Anyway, like I said I’ve accepted my flaws and merits, and am now dealing with their implications. I mean, since I’m super smart I get to go to a really good school (on a scholarship) that will almost guarantee me a spot in any university. However, I’m going to this school because i was severely bullied and will most definitely continue to be since my looks haven’t changed since last week. Also, this may be worse than what I’m used to since the bullies will be a lot smarter than the not so bright Jessica.

In addition to this, I’m now wearing the school uniform. And let me just tell you it’s awful! Im wearing a short red wavy skirt, knee high red socks and a buttoned up white blouse. On anyone else it’s pretty innocent and standard but on  me it’s horrendous. The short skirt and knee high socks emphasise my awkwardly long legs, and the white blouse is slightly see through that all my bras can only just be seen through it and believe me I’ve tried all of them. I’ve even tried to get my mum to buy some more. My mum’s got it in her head that sexy underwear means a confident lady which is why she insists on buying them. You may say that this is quite invasive but I can see she’s been painstakingly trying to increase my confidence. What she doesn’t understand is that Im a realist and feel secure in myself, my brains and my ugliness. 

I cant complain much about the outfit since I’d probably find fault in anything on me. After about 10 minutes of deciding to not wear a scarf due to the scorchingly hot weather but despite me wanting to cover up, I head downstairs. 

***

“Morning mum”, I say as the beautiful smell of a cooked breakfast reaches me and my mouth starts to drool. 

“Good morning my beautiful baby”, I roll my eyes at her blatant but endearing attempt at following the therapists advice; to continuously give me praises. 

“Hey, no cheek towards your mother young lady”, my dad says cat locking my eye roll. “Your mother has been cooking this for an hour now”. 

“Don’t worry Martin, I just wanted her to start her day right. New school and all”, mum says passing us a full plate each. 

I start digging in and get a nudge from dad. Smiling out of embarrassment I quickly say “um, thanks mum for breakfast, It’s delicious as always”. 

Once finished, I grab my bag and give my wonderfully supportive parents a hug while they give me sloppy kisses. 

Dad walks me to the front door and starts shuffling from side to side before saying “you look so smart in your new uniform. I know you’re scared of what this new school may be like but if you go there thinking positively it might just become true. Don’t be so down on yourself sweetheart. You have my brains and your mothers beautiful eyes and warm heart. You are our love. If anyone targets you because of that then they are the ugly ones not you and not us.”

“Thanks Dad”, I say while tearing up. 

He gives me one of the warmest and safest hugs, and adds “and hun, make sure you walk into that school confidently and if anyone troubles you, be sure to use some of the moves i tought you. Remember people will do what you allow them to.”

Dad gives me one more squeeze and I leave to catch the bus.