YOURS TO CONTROL

A NEW WAY OF LIFE

ELOISE GREEN

My phone buzzes.

But I ignore it, my attention still on my food

Chinese leftovers from last night

Audrey and I argued over getting Thai or Chinese but it makes no difference to me because I thought they both taste alike

I know a few people who’ll call me racist for saying that but I really don’t care.

The phone buzzes again.

And again.

God.

With a groan, I reach for it from the couch, nearly slipping because one of the couch legs is basically begging to give up on life. I unlock my phone lazily, ready to roll my eyes.

Then I freeze.

My breath catches.

I blink once. Twice. Three times.

Because there’s no way.

— CREDIT ALERT: $5,000.00 —

I sit up slowly.

“...What?”

My voice sounds small. Confused. Like it doesn’t belong to me.

I stare at the screen again, waiting for it to glitch. To disappear. To laugh in my face and say just kidding, broke girl.

But it doesn’t.

It’s still there.

Five. Thousand. Dollars.

My fingers start trembling.

“Oh my God…”

A shaky laugh escapes me, but it doesn’t feel like laughter—it feels like something breaking open inside me.

This is real.

This is actually real.

My chest tightens painfully, and before I even realize what’s happening, tears blur my vision.

“No way…” I whisper, my voice cracking.

I press my hand to my mouth as a sob escapes me.

I’m crying.

I’m actually crying.

Because for the first time in a very long time… I can breathe.

“Mum…” I whisper softly, staring at nothing and everything all at once. “I’m doing it.”

The promise.

That stupid, heavy promise I made standing beside her hospital bed, holding Audrey’s hand like we weren’t both terrified children pretending to be strong.

I’ll take care of her.

I’ll give us a better life.

The memory hits me without warning.

One second I’m staring at my phone, crying over a bank alert…

and the next—

I’m back there.

The hospital.

The smell hits first.

Antiseptic. Sharp. Cold. Like the walls themselves have given up on life.

I hate that smell.

I always will.

“Mum…” My voice sounds small. Too small for the room. Too small for everything that’s happening.

She looks… wrong.

Not the strong woman who used to hum in the kitchen while cooking, not the one who would laugh so loud the neighbors complained. Not the woman who used to tell me, “Eloise, you’re stronger than you think.”

This woman is pale.

Too pale.

Her skin looks thin, fragile, like it might tear if I touch her too hard.

And yet—I still reach for her.

Her hand is warm, but weak in mine. Weak in a way that terrifies me.

“Ellie…” she whispers, her voice barely there.

I choke.

I hate when she calls me that.

Because it makes me feel like a child.

And I can’t be a child right now.

I squeeze her hand tighter. “I’m here, Mum. I’m here.”

Audrey is beside me, clutching my arm like she might fall apart if she lets go. She’s crying silently, her shoulders shaking, her fingers digging into me like I’m the only thing keeping her standing.

And maybe I am.

God.

I don’t want to be.

I don’t want this.

“Mum… you’re going to be okay,” I lie.

The words come out automatically. Like if I say them enough times, they’ll become true.

But even as I say it, my chest burns.

Because I know.

We all know.

She gives me this look.

Soft and sad.

And it breaks something inside me.

“No,” she whispers gently but firmly . “Listen to me, Eloise.”

My name.

Not Ellie this time.

Eloise.

My throat tightens.

“I need you to take care of your sister,” she says, her fingers tightening slightly around mine. “Promise me.”

I shake my head immediately. “Don’t say that. Mum, please don’t—”

“Promise me,” she repeats, a little stronger this time, even though it clearly takes everything in her.

Audrey lets out a broken sob beside me.

I feel it then.

The weight.

It drops onto my shoulders like something physical and crushing……….

Because this isn’t just words.

“I—” My voice cracks. I can’t breathe properly. “Mum, I don’t know how—”

“You do,” she says softly. “You’ve always been strong.”

No.

No, I haven’t.

I’ve just been pretending.

But she looks at me like she believes it.

Like I have to be.

And suddenly… I understand.

There’s no choice.

There’s no running from this.

If I don’t step up, Audrey falls.

If I don’t hold it together, everything breaks.

My grip on her hand tightens.

“I promise,” I whisper, tears spilling freely now. “I promise I’ll take care of her.”

Her lips curve slightly.

Not a full smile.

But enough.

Enough to haunt me forever.

“Good girl…” she murmurs.

Those are the last words she says to me.

The machines start beeping.

Loud.

Too loud.

Panic erupts in the room. Nurses rush in. Doctors shout things I can’t understand.

“Ma’am, stay with us—”

“Get the—”

“Clear—”

I don’t move.

I can’t move.

I just stand there, frozen, still holding her hand as everything spirals out of control around me.

“Audrey, come on—” someone tries to pull us back.

“No!” Audrey screams, clinging tighter. “No, no, no—”

And then—

Silence.

The kind of silence that’s deafening

The kind that feels like something has been ripped out of the world.

The machine lets out a long, flat sound.

And I know.

I just… know.

My hand slowly slips from hers.

Cold.

Already getting cold.

“No…” I whisper.

But she’s gone.

The funeral comes like a blur.

Black clothes. Hollow faces. People saying “I’m sorry” like those words mean anything.

I don’t cry.

Not there.

Not when they lower her into the ground.

I stand beside Audrey, holding her hand like it’s the only thing keeping me upright.

Because I promised.

I promised.

And I don’t get to fall apart.

Not anymore.

My chest heaves as I blink the memory away.

Tears are still running down my face, but now they feel different.

“I’m doing it, Mum…” I whisper again, clutching my phone tighter.

“I didn’t break my promise.”

I thought it was just words back then.

Something you say so you don’t fall apart.

But now?

Now I can actually do it.

“I’m really doing it…” I choke out, tears slipping down my cheeks faster now.

I laugh through them, wiping my face roughly.

God, I probably look insane.

Crying over money like I just got proposed to.

But this isn’t just money.

This is rent paid.

This is food in the fridge.

This is Audrey not stressing over bills every single day.

This is… hope.

I clutch my phone tightly to my chest, closing my eyes.

“Thank you,” I whisper, though I don’t even know who I’m thanking.

Maybe God.

Maybe Mum.

Maybe… even the devil I signed a contract with.

My stomach flips at that thought.

Niccolò.

Of course this is him.

Of course it is.

Five thousand.

An advance?

A reminder that I signed a very suspicious contract?

I swallow hard, pushing that thought away quickly.

No.

Not today.

Today, I’m choosing happiness.

Two hours later, I’m standing in front of a building that looks like it doesn’t belong in my life.

Or maybe… it finally does.

“This is insane,” I mutter under my breath, staring up at it.

Clean walls. Proper paint. No cracks. No weird smell of dampness creeping through the air like an uninvited guest.

I smooth down my dress nervously and walk inside.

The difference hits me immediately.

The floor doesn’t creak.

The walls don’t look like they’re seconds away from collapsing.

And the air… God, the air actually smells clean.

I follow the agent—some overly cheerful woman who talks like she’s selling heaven itself—down a hallway.

“And this is the apartment,” she says, unlocking the door with a smile.

The door opens.

And I forget how to breathe.

“...Oh.”

That’s all I can say.

Because what the hell.

The living room is spacious—actually spacious, not “if-you-squint-it’s-big” spacious. Soft blue walls, smooth and freshly painted, with warm lighting that makes everything look softer, calmer.

There’s a large window letting in natural light, sunlight pouring in like it wants to be here.

No water stains.

No cracks.

No buckets needed.

I step inside slowly, like if I move too fast, it’ll disappear.

“This is… mine?” I whisper.

The agent laughs lightly. “If you decide to take it, yes.”

I move further in.

The couch—an actual proper couch, not the sad, wheezing thing we currently own—is neatly placed against the wall, soft grey with plush cushions that look like they won’t stab you in the back.

I run my fingers over it.

Soft.

“Wow…”

I walk into the kitchen next.

And I almost cry again.

Clean countertops.

White cabinets.

A sink that doesn’t look like it’s lived through three wars.

There’s even space. Actual space to cook without elbowing someone in the face.

“Audrey is going to lose her mind,” I whisper, a smile creeping onto my lips.

I can already imagine her here.

Cooking. Smiling. Not stressed.

Not tired.

Happy.

The thought alone makes my chest ache.

I move to the bedroom.

And God.

It’s beautiful.

A large bed sits in the center, neatly made with soft sheets that look like clouds decided to retire and become furniture.

There’s a wardrobe—an actual wardrobe, not the tiny excuse we currently fight over every morning.

A mirror stands by the wall, tall and elegant.

I step closer, staring at my reflection.

Do I look like someone who belongs here?

I tilt my head slightly.

Maybe… I could.

The bathroom is even better.

Clean tiles.

A proper shower.

No weird stains.

I let out a breath I didn’t realize I was holding.

“This is it,” I whisper.

This is the life I promised.

This is the life Audrey deserves.

My hands tremble slightly as I pull out my phone.

I want to call her.

God, I want to tell her everything.

But I stop.

She’s at work.

Probably stressed.

Probably dealing with some annoying client or her boss breathing down her neck.

No.

I want to see her face when she finds out.

I want to see her reaction.

The shock.

The joy.

The way her eyes light up.

I smile to myself.

“I’ll wait,” I murmur.

For once… I have something good to share.

Something real.

I take one last look around the apartment, my heart swelling in my chest.

This is just the beginning.

I can feel it.

Everything is changing.

And for the first time in a long time…

I’m not scared of it.

But maybe I should be

Because of the elephant in the room

Niccolo Freaking Marcello.

*************

Hey my loves

This chapter is about Eloise alone, I wanted you to get to know her and understand her choices clearly from henceforth.

I’ve got to give a little warning tho

From the next chapter I won’t be gentle (jk😂)

I mean enough playing around, let’s get the actual controlling started.

Love you guys so much