HER WEAKNESS

13.

My head is pounding.

It hurts to open my eyes but nothing compares to the tightness in my chest as last nights escapades replay in my head.

I can’t figure out whether Ingrid was trying to be sweet or whether she did it all on purpose to force me into the situation.

Why couldn’t she have waited longer?

I just told her that I loved her and I did.

I do.

I just wasn’t ready for that kind of reaction with my family.

It wasn’t like I hadn’t started thinking about it. I was going to tell my mum first. Things would be easier with her on my side and then together we could tell my father but now I had no idea whether the two would ever talk to me again.

And that was something I couldn’t forgive Ingrid for.

When the pounding in my head finally slowed down enough to open my eyes I realised that I was naked and in Ingrid’s sleeping arms.

So it wasn’t enough that she stripped me of my family but she also stripped me of my dignity while I was too drunk to stand up for what I wanted.

Shrugging Ingrid’s arm off me I sat up and glared at the bright light coming through her massive windows; trying to regain some sense of normality as I grabbed the jacket off the bed post and wrapped it around myself. I could hear Ingrid stirring behind me.

‘Morning.’ she said. ‘Amy?’ she said when I didn’t reply.

I turned around to look at Ingrid as she sat up the sheets of the bed falling off her enormous breasts. I swallowed the urge inside me suck her n*****s until they were raw.

‘Thank you for looking after me and bringing me here but I don’t forgive you for last night. You hurt me and now my family won’t even look at me. I will find my own place and get out of your hair.”

Ingrid said nothing as she stared at me. Then suddenly she got up flinging herself out of the bed so she was on my side, only inches away from my face. ‘Stay here as long as it takes to find somewhere. I won’t make the mistake of helping you again.’

It crushed me to see the pain in Ingrid’s face as she stormed out of the room and slammed the door making me jump.

Perhaps i was wrong to be so angry but it didn’t matter now it was over now.

Or at least so i thought but everything changed.

Ingrid only ever spoke to me at work and only in a professional manner. She was never alone with me in a room for five minutes and the minute we got back to her home she would disappear. I wouldn’t ever catch her just walking down the corridor and she never slept in her own room with me. I was starting to miss her.

The stagg kept me company and were really nice to me. Linda the head of staff was teaching me how to cook and that’s when I started noticing things. There would be walking around with guns all the time. There would be random people being rushed in covered in blood and it would be up to Linda and the rest of the staff to suture them up quickly and clean up the mess. In time I had completely forgotten to search for an apartment and was enjoying being in the house and feeling involved but every day no matter what i was craning my neck to see if I could see Ingrid.

It took a week before I finally saw her again and she wasn’t alone. They came through the front door together and noticed straight away that she looked familiar. She was the girl from the photo- Ingrid’s ex- but by the way she was clinging onto her arm you would think the two were still together. I was looking directly at Ingrid as she walked in with this girl and they took a seat in the living room but Ingrid didn’t care that I could see and it hurt more than I cared to admit.