The proposal

Chapter 2 Olivia’s side

I knew from the very start once I opened up this bag of secrets there was no going back. Everyone at work including friends knew Nathan would disappear weeks at a time sometimes a little longer but no one really questioned him. Sure if someone did I’d usually blame it on his mental illness I mean that wasn’t a lie everyone knew he was facing demons but no one not even my best friend Teagan knew that the real problem wasn’t just the mental illness it was heroine his choice of drug. When I first met Nathan he wasn’t using, in fact he had a great job a computer programmer and he was doing good, healthy even. I’m not sure what changed but after a few years one day I woke up and he wasn’t the same Nathan I had met back than. He had got fired from his job even begin stealing money but that wasn’t the bad part. No the bad part was when he’d disappear without a word and I’d be looking for him day and night leaving random people I knew he once knew my number hoping they would have heard from him but no luck. It wasn’t until I frantically called his friend Samuel begging to know where Nathan was that I found out about his dirty heartbreaking secret. He’d come home sober up for a little bit and than go back to binging again. It was an ugly and sad cycle but something I had unfortunately gotten use to. I made myself promise to not let anyone know about his habit even though it was becoming difficult. The only thing I knew to do was to let him know my door was open. So when my boss said he’d do anything I knew that when that time came I’d finally get the real help Nathan needed. I hated being attracted to Matthew but I couldn’t help it I was sure by this point what use to be between Nathan and I was no longer there. Matthew just wasn’t the settle down type and from all the gossip at work the last thing I wanted was to be another number to him. I never even thought Matthew would have to pay or bribe someone to play his girlfriend. It made me laugh but it was also what a womanizer like him deserved. It was also sad to think he couldn’t just be honest with his family. Surely they had to understand. I wasn’t too excited to be gone for a month but Matthew insisted he had already given a cover story for work though I was sure Teagan knew the truth, in fact I had been waiting for her to question me on it. I wasn’t exactly sure what to say if I was still away and Nathan had come back home. I could only hope he was ok. “Why the hell didn’t you tell me you were seeing Mr. Coleman himself”? Teagan asking while getting lunch together. “Teagan I am not seeing Matthew it’s more like a business arrangement.” I said flipping through a menu. I could tell by Teagan’s facial expression she wasn’t buying into the whole business arrangement. “Right and I’m supposed to believe that your best friend in the whole world.” Teagan said crossing her arms over her chest. “Teagan I don’t see why Matthew told you to begin with, I thought you guys were just a fling?” I asked her questioning. I really didn’t get their relationship I mean why only hook up if your going to share certain details with each other. “Olivia Bryant we hooked up one time and realized we were just better being friends which is why we communicate when we need to vent.” Teagan said getting upset. “Ok ok.” I said throwing my hands in the air as if waving a white flag. Arguing with Teagan was like arguing with a kid there was just no end to it. “Moving to a more pressing note have you heard from Nathan?” Teagan asked curiously. The question I often didn’t know quite how to answer. “He hasn’t been home if that’s what your asking but I talked to a friend of his and he’s ok.” I said hoping Teagan would just drop the subject. “If he’s ok than why can’t he be ok at home and why not just break things off and start over like with Matthew.” Trying to keep from spitting my steak out from what Teagan had just said. I know she may have had a point but in a time that man needed me I wasn’t about to just leave him high and dry not too mention I did love him maybe not in love but yes I did love him. “Teagan some things are just complicated.” I assured her. “Do you love him?” Teagan asked bluntly. “Teagan I do love him I just haven’t seen him enough to know if it’s in love.” I said “look can we just not talk about my relationship with Nathan?” I asked her getting annoyed with every question. After lunch was over we went shopping for a few things I might need for Bora Bora with Teagan trying to put every piece of sexy clothing in the cart. When she wasn’t looking I sneak stuff out and put it back just because I was playing the role of someone’s girlfriend didn’t mean I wanted to act on those feelings. I mean you might as well call me the worst person in the world having their boyfriend out getting high and playing house with her boss and I knew some would even look at me that way. The only way I knew to get Nathan the treatment he needed when he was ready to sober back up was with the help of Matthew and of course his money and it wasn’t like Matthew didn’t know up front I just hoped I didn’t come to regret this. Once I got back home and unloaded all the shopping bags I was tired. All I wanted to do was go to bed when my phone started ringing. “Hello.” I spoke into the phone listening to someone breathing. “Olivia? Is this Olivia?” The voice on the other end asked. My heart began skipping a beat I knew that voice from anywhere it was Nathan..my Nathan. “Nathan it’s me sweetie where are you? Are you ok? Do you want me to come get you?” I asked relieved he remembered my number and called. “Olivia!” He spoke while sobbing into the phone. “I’m so sorry Olivia!” He said through his sobs. My heart ached for him I suddenly didn’t feel like I could stand and kneeled on the kitchen floor. “I know Nathan it’s ok I’m still here for you please come home.” I said as gently as I could. “No Olivia you can’t see me like this I’m…I’m not…” I couldn’t hear his words as he was crying. “Olivia I can’t let you see me like this…I’m in way to deep this time I…I….I can’t stop I need it so bad Olivia.” He choked out his words. Crying on my kitchen floor wishing I could save the man that once shared a life with me before drugs came into play. “Olivia I just wanted to hear your voice please forgive me” Nathan said before the phone hung up. Crying I tried calling the number back and no reply I even texted the number a few times hoping that he was still sober enough to answer back. I wasn’t sure what time I had drifted off to sleep. Last night was the first time I had actually heard Nathan’s voice in three weeks. I texted Matthew letting him know I was serious about the plan and needed to know everything there was about his family. If this plan was going to work, if I was going to save Nathan’s life I had to know everything I had to play my part and in time I could only hope everyone understood. Meeting Matthew at his house wasn’t what I had in mine when he said he wanted to give me the deets on his family but I guess since I was playing his girlfriend than I might as well see what the inside of his condo looked like. I wasn’t surprised his condo was of elegance I mean I never even saw the man in anything besides a suit not that I was trying to. Of course him being the CEO meant he could live luxurious if he wanted to. “Olivia as glad as I am to have you here in my presence we really need to talk.” Matthew said seeming all serious. I nodded my head knowing exactly where this conversation was about to go and I knew I had to prepare myself. “What exactly do you mean as drugs Olivia?” Matthew asked me not knowing how bad it really was. “Look Matthew it’s like I said he’s on drugs and when he’s ready to sober up I need the expenses covered when it’s time for him to go to treatment.” I said sitting down on a leather black chair. “How long have you known?” Matthew asked not looking at all happy. “The whole time I just didn’t won’t others to know.” I answered back trying to hide my embarrassment. “Olivia you know you could have just spoke up instead of acting as if you didn’t know what was going on.” Matthew said. “No you don’t understand it’s not easy to speak up and admit something like that and how was I going to help when I can’t afford to get him help.” I spat out annoyed at the fact he would even question me. “Olivia I don’t mind helping you but you can’t help him if he doesn’t won’t the help.” Matthew said. “I know this but trust me he’s gonna want help please you can’t just let this take him away.” I said looking up into Matthew’s eyes. “Olivia this addiction is already taken him away I mean look at you holding out on life worried about someone who isn’t even worried about the affects this may have on you. Matthew said softly kneeling down in front of me. “Let me guess Matthew your worried right? Hell you don’t even know me.” I spit out angrily. Matthew softly caressed my face looking into my tear filled eyes. “I want to know you Olivia the good and the bad and everything in between.” He whispered. I couldn’t help the tears that started falling down my face with the words that were just shared between us. “Liv let’s call it a night you can sleep in my bed and I’ll take the couch it’s the least I can do.” Matthew said grabbing my hand and leading me to his room. “Make yourself comfortable Liv and if you need anything I’ll be in the living room.” He said as he started turning to walk out of the room. “Matthew.” I called out and watched as he turned back around and came back into the room. “Thank you.” Was all I could say before I found myself pulling him into a hug. He warm body pressed up against mine with his arms and hands around my waist, he smelled delicious and felt even better. Cursing myself for the overdue affection I haven’t felt in a while because in this moment I didn’t won’t to let go. “Your welcome Liv.” He whispered in my ear as goosebumps spread across my body. Suddenly he stepped back from me and without a word left the room I wasn’t sure why but I could feel a since of pain watching him walk into a different part of the condo without saying a word. I climbed into his huge California king and drifted away into sleep not realizing how tired I really was. I woke up to the smell of blueberries glancing at the clock I jumped out of bed and ran into the kitchen to see Matthew cooking blueberry waffles. “We are so late for work.” I said feeling my stomach ache at the delicious smell of waffles. “Relax works covered for the rest of the week now sit and eat.” Matthew said handing me a plate of warm blueberry waffles. “I have to prep you for my family before our trip and I need you focused.” He said winking at me and for the first time I was shocked to see him in sweats and no shirt. God was his chest a work of art! I couldn’t help but stare and my mouth definitely watered and it wasn’t for the waffles sitting in front of me. God I had so many lustful thoughts of this man I wasn’t sure how I could handle a month with him. I always felt guilty afterwards because in a way I wasn’t exactly single despite what others may have thought. Sure Nathan could be strung out f*****g the next high chick he met but than again who was I to say he was or wasn’t. I always knew drugs made people different, made them do things they normally wouldn’t do but that didn’t mean I was going to hate or berate the man, if anything it made me want to help him even more. “Olivia we only have a few days left before our flight maybe you could stay here until than?” Matthew suggested while clearing the table from breakfast. “As nice as that is I think I’ll just stay at my place you know to make sure it has everything if Nathan comes home.” I said. Matthew’s face hardened as I mentioned Nathan and the possibility of him coming home. “I don’t won’t to start an argument or upset you.” Matthew said placing his hands on the counter in front of him. “Than don’t!” I said back with annoyance in my tone. “I think I’m just going to go if you feel you left things out just text me.” I said while grabbing my things to head to the door. I didn’t give Matthew time to speak I was annoyed sure I could give him the benefit of the doubt because maybe he didn’t understand but I did understand I lived it. I stayed at home the next two days making sure the apartment was in order just in case Nathan was to come by. I hadn’t spoke to Matthew since I barged out his door and I was surprised he didn’t message me either. It was the last day I’d be at home and I was trying to make sure everything was packed even though I hadn’t talked to Matthew since I stormed out of his condo. Lighting candles and playing some soft jazz music I ran me a bath and added some bubbles. I could smell the vanilla lavender fill the bathroom and start to linger in the hallway outside the bathroom. Undressing I slipped into the hot water leaning back on the tub and closing my eyes. “Knock knock knock!” I heard coming from my apartment door. Not realizing who it could be I jumped out the tub and wrapped a towel around me in a hurry and ran to the door. “Is that how you greet everyone?” Matthew said looking me up and down. Rolling my eyes “Surprised to see you here!” Opening the door to let him in. “We made a deal signed and all remember?” Matthew asked walking in my apartment. “Right!” I said walking to my bedroom to get some clothes. At least the man stood by his word. “I prefer you naked.” Matthew said standing in my bedroom door way. “Get out!” I yelled pushing him out the way to close my door. I could hear him laughing while I put on a pair of night sorts and a t shirt. Opening the door to glare at him trying to act all upset. “Come on your about to play my girlfriend isn’t it time we saw each other in their true form?” Could this man really be this much of a pain in my butt. “I told you no s*x, plus there’s plenty of other women you could try and seduce.” I said. “And I told you I want you.” He said inching closer to me. “Matthew please.” I said hesitantly. “Please what Liv?” He whispered as he pressed his lips against my neck. Letting out a soft moan I could feel my heart began to race. “Liv don’t fight it, I can tell you want this…you want me.” He said softly kissing and sucking on my neck. God it felt good too damn good in fact. I couldn’t remember the last time I felt like wanting to lose control. I could feel his c**k harden beneath his pants and my p***y was aching and dripping at the thought of him in between my legs. Before I could register what was happening Matthew had me pinned up against the wall with my legs wrapped around him. “God Liv I want you so bad.” He said leaning in to kiss my lips. God I wanted this, I wanted the touch, the high it would bring. “Matthew take me.” I said whispering not knowing if he heard me. With a sinister smile he ripped my T-shirt off leaving my breast out in the open. Suddenly his mouth was on my n*****s kissing and sucking sending shocks of ecstasy through my body. “Yes!” I moaned out not wanting him to stop. Suddenly without warning there was a pounding noise coming from the apartment door. Looking at each other we came untangled from each other. After I quickly composed myself I went to the door to answer it. “Nathan!” I shouted out loud.