Christian (bxb)

Not alone

(Jaxon)

I looked down at Christian as I kept my arms around him. His crying had finally stopped, but I could tell he was tired. He'd spent so long fighting everything that eventually it had all come out at once. I hated knowing he'd been carrying that much without telling anyone.

Greyson and Mason stood nearby watching us. Neither of them looked happy about what had happened. We'd spent years thinking staying close to Christian was the best thing we could do for him. Maybe we'd been wrong.

Christian couldn't stay out here forever. His family was probably wondering where he was by now. We needed to get him back to the pack house. I just didn't want him thinking we were forcing him to go.

I slipped one arm under his legs and lifted him. Christian gasped and immediately wrapped his arms around my neck. I waited for him to tell me to put him down. He didn't.

“You okay?”

Christian nodded against me. His head rested against my chest as I started walking. Greyson and Mason came with us. Neither of them tried to take Christian from me.

We didn't talk much on the way back. Christian had already said enough for one day. I wasn't going to ask him about being our mate again. He knew how we felt.

Shylo had been unusually quiet inside my head. That alone told me how much this had affected him too. He wanted Christian just as badly as I did. Neither of us wanted him if getting him meant making him miserable.

‘He's scared of us.’

‘I know.’

‘We need to fix that.’

‘We will.’

I looked down at Christian again. His eyes were closed, but I knew he wasn't sleeping. Every now and then, his fingers moved against the back of my neck. I wondered if he even realized he was doing it.

As we got closer to the pack house, I could see people outside. The party wasn't the same as when we'd left. Most people weren't talking or laughing anymore. It didn't take much to figure out why.

Micah spotted us first. He left the others and came straight toward us. The second Christian heard him coming, his eyes opened. He lifted his head from my chest.

“Christian!”

Micah reached us and stopped directly in front of me. His eyes went straight to Christian. I could see the worry all over his face. Christian saw it too.

“Is he okay?”

Before I could answer, Christian started moving in my arms. I lowered him until his feet touched the ground. He didn't even look back at me. He went straight to Micah.

“Pop.”

Micah wrapped both arms around him. Christian buried his face against him and held on. I stepped back to give them some space. Greyson and Mason did the same.

I understood why Christian needed him. Micah was his Pop, and he'd been there his entire life. We couldn't expect Christian to find that same kind of comfort with us yet. We hadn't earned that from him.

Greyson moved closer to Micah. I could tell he was choosing his words before he spoke. Christian was still holding onto his Pop. Micah looked over at Greyson.

“He ran from us.”

Micah didn't look surprised. He kept one arm around Christian while listening. I wondered if Christian had already told him how he felt about us. Judging by Micah's reaction, he probably had.

“We tried to talk to him, but he wasn't ready.”

Micah nodded. His hand moved through Christian's hair. Christian stayed where he was. Nobody tried to make him move.

“I ran from Landon too when I found out he was my mate.”

Christian lifted his head. He looked at Micah like he'd never heard that story before. I hadn't either. Micah gave him a small smile.

“It was a lot for me too.”

Micah's hand moved toward Christian's neck. At first, I didn't think anything of it. Then his fingers moved over the place where a mate mark would normally be. I knew exactly what he was checking.

A growl escaped me.

Greyson and Mason reacted at the same time. Micah looked toward us. Christian turned too.

“We didn't mark him.”

Greyson stepped closer. I could tell he didn't like that Micah had even considered the possibility. Neither did I. Christian had been scared enough without anyone thinking we'd forced a mark on him.

“We'd never do that without his permission.”

Mason moved beside Greyson. His attention stayed on Micah. I knew what he was thinking because I was thinking the same thing. Christian had to choose us.

“We respect Christian's choices.”

Micah pulled his hand away from Christian's neck. He looked between the three of us. Whatever he saw seemed to satisfy him. His attention returned to his son.

“I know.”

Micah kept Christian beside him. There was something in his face I didn't understand at first. Then I remembered the stories we'd heard about him and Landon. Micah had his own reasons for checking.

“I just had to make sure.”

That was enough for me. I wasn't going to get angry with him for worrying about his son. If Christian were mine already, I'd probably worry about everything too. Maybe even more than Micah did.

I stepped closer and rested my hand on Christian's arm. He looked at it before looking up at me. I waited to see if he'd move away. He didn't.

“We'd never force you.”

Christian watched me for a few seconds. I didn't know what he was thinking. At least there wasn't the same fear in his eyes that I'd seen in the forest. That had to count for something.

“You're our mate, but the choice is still yours.”

Christian looked down. Micah kept his arm around him. I wanted to know what Christian was thinking, but I didn't ask. He'd tell us when he wanted to.

Micah touched Christian's cheek. Christian looked back at him. The way Micah looked at his son made it clear he wasn't going to let anyone pressure him again. That included us.

“You don't have to decide anything right now.”

Christian nodded. His eyes moved toward the pack house before coming back to Micah. I could tell he was thinking about everyone waiting for him. Going back probably wasn't going to be easy.

“Thanks, Pop.”

Christian looked at the three of us next. Greyson moved closer but stopped before getting too near. Mason stayed beside me. We waited for Christian to speak.

“I don't know what I want yet.”

I wanted to tell him that was okay, but I kept my mouth shut. This wasn't about what I wanted to hear. Christian needed to say what he felt without worrying about our reaction. We owed him that much.

“I just need some time.”

Mason nodded. He didn't look disappointed. If anything, he seemed relieved that Christian was finally telling us exactly what he needed. Now we had to listen.

“Take all the time you need.”

Greyson rested his hand on Christian's arm. Christian looked at him but didn't pull away. Greyson didn't move any closer. He finally seemed to understand that Christian needed to control the distance between them.

“You don't have to figure everything out today.”

Christian gave him a small smile. It wasn't much, but after watching him run from us earlier, it meant something. I found myself smiling too. Maybe we hadn't completely ruined our chances.

“Thank you.”

Micah turned toward the pack house. Christian stayed close to him as they started walking. Greyson, Mason, and I followed a few steps behind. This time, none of us tried to surround him.

Most of the guests had already started leaving. Everyone had realized something was wrong after Christian disappeared. I knew there would be questions later. Right now, none of them mattered.

Christian glanced back at us once. I expected him to turn away immediately, but he didn't. He watched us for a second before facing forward again. That tiny look gave me more hope than it probably should have.

We'd been so sure being his mates meant we had to stay close to him all the time. Today had shown us exactly how wrong we'd been. Christian didn't need three men deciding what was best for him. He needed us to listen when he told us what he wanted.

I looked at Greyson and Mason. They both understood it too. If Christian needed time, we'd give him time. No matter how difficult it was.

For now, he was coming back with us.

That was enough.