Crush Me Not (English)

4: Can't Fall Harder

Several days had passed since the incident between Reena and Lexus. For days now, Reena had been secretly glancing at the young man. The embarrassment she felt because of what happened still hadn’t faded, so instead of trying to get closer, she avoided him.

That wasn’t too difficult for Reena since they only shared a few subjects. Lexus was a transferee, making his class schedule irregular. He attended different classes at different times. Reena also found out that Lexus was the cousin of the university owner's son, Xander Anderson. No wonder he was able to enroll at Anderson University even though the semester was already halfway through. Connections are key, and they surely work.

“You’re getting serious with Lexus.”

She snapped out of her deep thoughts upon hearing that. She turned to her friend, Maze, who was also watching the basketball team’s practice game in their school gym.

Reena just shrugged, not giving a response. It wasn’t anything new since she regularly watched practice games for Jack and Peter—her top crushes. She was always present at practice games and actual matches just to watch the two.

Well, that’s how it was supposed to be. Earlier, her full attention had been on them. But the moment Lexus entered the court with his cousin Xander, her gaze became fixated on him.

Oh, she almost forgot that Xander was also one of the varsity players at their school. He was handsome, just like her other crushes. He was intelligent and also skilled at basketball. It just so happened that committed guys weren’t her thing. Xander was now happily in love with his girlfriend, Zerina. At least she had some decency. If someone was taken, she stayed away. She wasn’t like other girls who flirted with just anyone.

“I think Lexus is an exception among your boys. He’s different,” Maze pointed out, her eyes still on the basketball court. She even shook her head as she said it. Reena was easy to read, after all. Maze knew her too well.

On the other hand, Reena just gave Maze a puzzled look. Even though she had a hint of what she was saying, she didn’t want to assume anything. “What do you mean?” she asked, still playing clueless.

She hoped that pretending not to understand would help. But the moment Maze stared at her seriously… she knew her act didn’t work at all. She quickly avoided her gaze and reached for the bottled water beside her to take a sip. She tried to hide her nervousness, especially since her friend wouldn’t stop looking at her.

“You think I haven’t noticed?” Maze said again, squinting at her. “You’re giving him special attention, Reena. You always steal glances at him. I even caught you stalking his f*******: account.”

Reena’s mouth fell open as she turned to Maze. She had no idea she had been caught stalking Lexus. She wanted to defend herself, but no words would come out.

Before she could think of anything to say, Maze spoke again. Her voice was soft but emphasized every word. “And now, this. You used to cheer for Peter and Jack while watching them play. But now, look at you, quietly watching Lexus. He has your full attention.”

Reena blinked several times, feeling like she was running out of breath as she looked at Maze. “But… I’m watching the game, not Lexus!” she protested when she finally managed to speak. Her voice was defensive, making it even more obvious that she was guilty.

Maze smirked and rolled her eyes. Of course, she didn’t believe her. They had been friends for a long time, and she had noticed the changes in Reena ever since Lexus arrived at Anderson University.

“Why don’t you believe me? I’m telling the truth!” Reena said in frustration. She even pouted before shifting her attention back to the practice game. After a while, she looked at her friend again. “And besides, the things you mentioned earlier… I do that with my other crushes too, Maze,” she reasoned. She was really trying to keep calm. She knew her friend wouldn’t stop until she admitted the truth.

“You don’t avoid your crushes, Reena,” Maze said seriously before turning to her. “But Lexus… you’ve been avoiding him for days, haven’t you?” She gave Reena a knowing look, which she quickly avoided. The nervousness in her chest only grew stronger.

“I’m not avoiding him,” Reena denied again. “If I were, then I would’ve left the gym the moment he arrived,” she added.

Maze chuckled as if Reena had just cracked a joke. “Of course! Why would you leave? You wouldn’t because you still want to watch him play,” she said with a grin.

“W-what are you saying?” Reena asked, pretending to be confused. It seemed like she had been caught off guard. No matter how much she tried to get out of it, there was no escaping Maze. She had been completely caught.

“Stop denying it, Reen,” her friend said with a smile. “There’s nothing wrong with admitting it,” she added.

“Of course, I’ll deny it. Ah, no! There’s nothing to deny because I’m telling the truth. Peter and Jack are the reasons I’m here. You know that, Maze,” Reena insisted.

Maze smirked. “Yeah, right. That’s why you’re not making a scene like you usually do—because you don’t want Lexus to know you’re here. You’re staying quiet so you can freely watch him,” she said again, crossing her arms and glancing at Lexus. She was about to call out to him when Reena suddenly grabbed her arm. She raised an eyebrow. “Oh, what’s wrong?” she asked, laughing.

“What are you planning to do?” Reena asked, her face scrunched up.

“I’ll just cheer for them,” Maze said casually. “Why do you look so nervous? I’m right, aren’t I? You don’t want Lexus to know you’re here?” she asked teasingly. She didn’t know why, but Reena’s reaction amused her.

Reena cleared her throat before speaking. “Is it wrong to be quiet for once? I just thought that… maybe Jack is getting annoyed with my noise.” Reena paused. In truth, she had run out of things to say. She only snapped back to reality when Maze laughed.

“Oh, wow!” she exclaimed, even clapping her hands. “Since when did you start caring about what others think?” she asked, half in awe, half in sarcasm.

Reena stayed silent, unable to respond.

Maze had a point. Reena had done all sorts of crazy things before and never cared about what people said. She herself didn’t even know where she got that excuse from. Even she admitted that it was lame.

When Maze continued staring at her, waiting for an answer, Reena was forced to speak again. “Uhh… change is inevitable, you know?” she said, awkwardly chuckling. She was trying to lighten the conversation.

She knew what Maze was getting at. She thought Reena was starting to like Lexus in a different way. She wouldn’t mind if her friend pointed that out. The only problem was that she couldn’t even admit it to herself yet. That couldn’t happen.

“Does that also mean you’ll stop liking so many guys? That you’ll focus on just one?” Maze asked again, flashing a mischievous smile, as if she already knew she was right.

“I… I don’t know,” was all Reena could say. She avoided Maze’s gaze. She gave up. Even if she didn’t say anything, her friend already knew the truth. If anything, it felt like Maze knew her better than she knew herself. Or maybe, she already knew the truth but was too afraid to admit it.

Thankfully, Maze didn’t press the issue any further. Reena turned her attention back to the court, watching as Lexus prepared to take a three-point shot. She was completely focused on him, feeling her heartbeat quicken. She placed a hand on her chest, feeling how fast it was beating.

Maybe she was just excited to see if he would make the shot or not. After all, this was her first time watching him play. Her heart jumped with joy when he effortlessly made the shot. His teammates approached him, praising him excitedly. She wouldn’t be surprised if he ended up joining the Anderson University basketball team.

Reena couldn’t stop herself from smiling. She felt like a proud girlfriend. Then, after a while, she sighed.

She wished she really was his girlfriend.

She was just grateful that Maze didn’t say anything more. She turned her eyes back to the guy who was now about to shoot the ball. Lexus was aiming for a three-pointer. She stared at him intently.

Reena felt her heartbeat quicken. She placed a hand over her chest and could clearly feel the rapid pounding—though she wasn’t sure why.

Maybe she was just excited to see whether he would make the shot or not. After all, this was the first time she had ever watched him play. Her heart leaped with joy when he effortlessly sank the ball into the hoop. His teammates immediately approached him, showering him with praise. She wouldn’t be surprised if one day Lexus officially became part of Anderson University’s basketball team.

Reena couldn’t stop herself from smiling at the sight. She felt like a proud girlfriend. But after a moment, she sighed. She found herself wishing she really was his girlfriend.

However, it seemed unlikely that someone like Lexus wouldn’t have a girlfriend already. That’s why she had to guard her heart early on. She couldn’t let herself fall harder for him. She had spent so long protecting her heart, and she wasn’t about to let Lexus turn her world upside down.

‘Wait, why am I even thinking about us being together?’

She quickly shook her head, trying to dismiss the thought. Then, she stole one last glance at Lexus before urging her friend to leave. When Maze asked why, she didn’t answer.

All she knew was that she needed to get out of there. She was starting to fear the effect Lexus was having on her.