It has been a couple of weeks since I met her. She introduced herself as a spirit with no name, yet she says she’s more than that. She says she has no idea why she woke up inside my consciousness that she calls “ plain” and every time I close my eyes, I always end up standing in front of her on this plain. She informed me about the two abilities she brought with her. The ability to summon beings and the ability to adapt.
With this, I convinced myself that I am Schizophrenic and I need help.
“I told you I’m real!” She insisted as I did my best to ignore her tiny child-like voice nagging on the back of my head.
“So what does this entity look like?” Dr. Grimell asked as he looked intently at me, holding his pen, ready to jot down some notes.
“She’s a bit shorter than me, black hair and a really dark iris. She can either be really pale or really glowing depending on her mood.” I did my best to describe what I first noticed about this entity. Dr. Grimell stared at me as if waiting for the continuation of my description. “She’s actually kind of cute.”
“What? You think I’m cute?” I can hear her voice sounding embarrassed from what I’ve said.
“You can’t take compliments?” I instinctively answered back as if I were talking to a real person. The doctor looked at me curiously as if trying his best to analyze what was going on inside my head.
“So… You mentioned you got dumped?” He tried to hold in a chuckle as he did his best to look me in the eyes in the most trying-hard-to-look-normal face.
It may have been a funny question given the circumstances. Me getting dumped, suddenly hearing a girl’s voice in my head and seeing her and teleporting to her place every time I closed my eyes. “I must’ve really lost it” I whispered to myself frustratingly as I hid my face with my hands.
“No, you’re good” She assured, as if all of this made sense to her. I tried my best not to answer. I tried my best not to say “Really?” and it came out as a big deep sigh.
Dr. Grimell must’ve felt how frustrated I was. He patted me on the back after closing his notebook. And instructed me to go home for now, he handed me an empty notebook and asked me to write the conversations the voice and I have.
“So this is going to be our diary?” She gasped with excitement as I exited the building, holding the notebook firmly.
“Our diary!?” The words came out of my mouth unconsciously, and people stared at me with their judgmental eyes. I lowered my head and plugged in my earphones so that I could pretend I was talking with someone over the phone. “Do you still not remember your name?”
“I already told you, didn’t I? I don’t even know how I got stuck in your Plain in the first place. What a hellhole.” She said with a hint of disgust. I can’t blame her though. The first time I saw the place I almost threw up. It’s not that the place stinks or is in any way disgusting, but it is such an eerie plain with an ominous vibe to it. The heavy fog surrounding the plain, the gray withering trees dying from lack of whatever nutrients they need, and animal carcasses scattered randomly across the plain. It’s like a haunted place devoid of hope. “Hey, go somewhere peaceful, let’s talk.”
I walked around the vicinity searching for someplace I could sit but I forgot that it was a Saturday, people crowding every place they could go to enjoy themselves and relax from five days of work. I remember I used to spend my weekends like these people before being a complete loser who just stays inside his room 24/7. I released a deep sigh while searching for a good place to chill, but then I remembered one place where I and someone I know used to go a lot to just enjoy each other’s company.
“Wow, this place is pretty cool.” The voice said as I walked inside a garden filled with different kinds of colorful flowers and a number of trees decorated with a lot of Christmas lights. For some reason, I forgot that it’s already December. The place is located in the farthest part of this huge park. It’s more than thirty minutes away from the main entrance and there’s a huge flight of stairs that sits below the entrance of this park, so that’s why there are not a lot of people who bother to get to this place. The only one I know that goes here on a daily basis would be Granny, the caretaker of this place.
“Well, hello there Jino. I haven’t seen you in a long time. Where’s Vira?” the cheery old lady greeted me, apparently unaware of me and Vira’s situation. Yes, the only reason I knew of this place is because of my past friend. Ex? I’m not even sure what we were, it’s really complicated but we often come here to chill and watch time go by with each other’s company. For the longest time, I thought we had something going on between the two of us, but it was just me being a hopeless i***t.
“Why are you so deep in thought when that old lady said hi to you?” The voice called me out as I began to get lost in my own train of thoughts and memories. “Say hi to the old lady already so we can talk.”
“Hi, Granny! She doesn’t feel like going out today, so I just came by myself to take a breather from life.” I shouted, waving my hands left and right. She smiled, nodded, and went on her merry way to take care of her precious plants. I sat in the most secluded area which overlooks the city. I closed my eyes and then I saw her again. The voice.
“Let’s address the important matter first. Who’s Vira?” she teased. I reacted the way a high school kid would react when someone found out who his crush was, she laughed her heart out before sitting next to me as we stared at a dead tree.
“So what are you and what’s a plain?” I looked at her seriously, and her expression changed. She looked confused as she fiddled with her finger and looked up at the dark sky. She stared back at me with a worried look.
“To start off, a plain is a place deep inside a person’s soul. As you can see, your soul is depressing to be in, which makes sense since you’re hurting, but a plain basically shows you what a person is inside and how strong they are. For now, you’re way weaker than I am.” She explained.
“So I assume your plain looks better then?”
“Of course it does.” She stood up enthusiastically, spinning around while explaining how her plain had colorful flowers and strong trees with a breeze that smelled like they came fresh from an ocean. After flexing her own plain, she stared at me intently again with a sad and almost regretful look in her eyes. I may not know who I am, but I do know something. I’m not what you call a human and I know I’m here to help you with one thing. You’ll be in danger, so we need to get stronger.
I didn’t want to believe what she just said but the conviction in her eyes when she said I needed to get stronger gave me goosebumps and a grasp on the validity of what she explained. I wanted to ask her more, but for some reason, the fear of knowing the future keeps me from doing it. She must’ve seen the struggling look on my face.
“I’ll help you. You can call me Jane. It’s not my real name but it sounds nice so I’ll go with it.” She smiled. I can’t believe it; an imaginary being is comforting me. “I don’t really know what your past is, but don’t let that person who made you this way stay in your head while you’re not in hers. Also, open your eyes and dodge left.” She slapped me, instantly opening up my eyes to see a huge humanoid figure dropping towards me from way up in the sky.