At his will

Truths and Half Truths

Raymond POV :

It's been, three days and I can't get Jeremy to feel better,  he's an amazing little kid with Croisee, I managed to stabilize him but no progress towards reducing the pain. When I saw him I immediately knew it was Croisee because I was fascinated with rear diseases in school, that how my buddy knew to call me. I'm glad he did.  Jeremy will be ok soon, a doner came in matching him but surgery will be tomorrow or the day after, is body is not strong enough yet, my pager suddenly went off indicating that something is wrong, I spring up and ran to Jeremy room, he surrounded by nurses the're trying to stabilize him.  He's throwing up and my stomach knots up, but now is not the time to panic I need to be his strength. "we have to do this now!" I yell and people immediately get to their surgery taskings. "Come on Jeremy, be brave, you can do it!"

He smiled a tiny smile and the anesthesia sunk in. The surgery took eight hours, I didn't want to rush, it's different with children because of their size. I'm confident that things will work out, we just need to wait until his body accepts the treatment.

A tiredness overwhelms me and I'm starving! I can't wait to see Alicia though.

Alicia POV:

(On the hotel balcony)

I don't know what to say so I just stare. I hope this is not a trick to get me to not come down to the hospital and verify his whereabouts.  I decide to just leave it be. I lean in to him and he embraces me and I feel comfort in him, a bit too much.

With Ray gone I am alone. Well the housekeeper is here but she isn't speaking to me.  I walk in the closet and run my hands through the few dress shirts and jackets Ray has hanging; my mind briefly goes back to us planning our wedding.

FLASHBACK

"Sweetie isn't this delicious?" My mom asks referring to the cakes set out in front of us, we are at a tasting at 'Chaud' pronounced 'show' a restaurant on the Boulevard, its quaint and beautiful. "Mmmm" I manage to mumble and I am back in my mind again. Raymond rests his hand on my thigh and his smile is beaming, I smile back.

They talk back and forth for a bit smiling and eating cake and for the life of me i can't break out of this trance and hear them. I want to i just can't seem to.

Soon after a waitress comes and clears our table and another replaces the cake with a large platter with various types of shrimp.  I ask for an excuse and I go to the bathroom, while there I contemplate on washing my face just to get some relief but i know Julia will disapprove so i do not.

I put on an AML and i waltz out of the restroom,  I sit and even move my chair closer to Raymond’s this gets a smile and a nod from my mom so i know she is pleased and I feel proud.  He places a yellowish shrimp in my mouth, saying that he thinks it's delicious; it does taste good so i smile.

After the tasting, we're joined by the head chef and the manager.  The wedding planner who was with us the entire time was going through the different items for a final decision.  When asked our preference for each item, the wedding planner looked at my mom and my mom looked at Ray he chose one or two and they would troubleshoot. Ray asked me once at the beginning what I thought "Alicia which do you prefer?"

"I liked the shrimp in tomato sauce" I confidently said.

"I don't think that will go well with the other items dear" my mother interrupted us.  "Well it's one I liked, I am the bride aren't I?" the air got tense as our company started looking around for anything to keep their eyes away from us.

"Suzan darling, you have experience in these things what's your opinion?" Her question was directed at the planner.

"Well I... I think you're right Mrs Lambstone" she stammered.

"And you Raymond, what do you think"

"I do like the tomato shrimp but I understand your point,  however it is Alicia's.."

"Then it's settled! We're going with the pepper shrimp" she interrupted. "Write that down Javier. Next order of business".

No one said anything we just moved on.

When the day was through my mom and I said our goodbyes and thank you's. Raymond hugged me and told me that soon I'll be Mrs Johansson and I will get all my hearts desires.

I got into our chauffeur driven Rolls-Royce Ghost and Ray got into his Ferrari Leferrari and waved goodbye and blew a kiss my way.  "You are one lucky girl, don't make him regret it" my mother said in a calm tone.  I wonder for a moment if she thinks me a disappointment.

My mother has never shown me anything but love, I received the best and she spent as much time as she could with me.  I had never felt unwanted.  She would always attend my recitals, cheer loudly.  Scream 'that's my baby' when I performed solos.  Everything a loving mother would.

We sat quietly on the drive home; I kept wondering what the ending of Ray's sentence was. Was he going to defend me against Julia? No one defies her, no one tells her no.  The ride home felt like the longest journey ever.

END OF FLASHBACK

I walk out of the closet and plow myself onto the bed; I try to figure out if I should tell Raymond about Tyson.  Maybe I don't have to;  nothing happened anyway.

I know this is not true so I scold myself, will he divorce me because of it? What will my parents think?  No no no I definitely cannot tell Raymond the truth.

I think about my dad being disappointed with me and the tears come immediately.   I will make things work with Raymond and my parents would be proud.

I lie in bed and continue to sulk, soon after i drift to sleep.

I dream I'm sitting at home waiting for Ray and I'm bored and lonely, I'm frustrated about the way my life turned out. I look around and I'm in a beautiful house,  I have things,  everything perhaps!  But not happiness...

Suddenly there is a knock at my door, I go to greet my visitor and I see that its Ty and he's.... naked? But I'm not surprised and not angry for some reason.  I hustle him inside and immediately start kissing him; I'm excited and I feel free. I feel liberated! 

He lifts me and I straddle him,  he walks over to the sofa and gently lays me down,  I look up at him and I'm already naked! I notice that our complexion complements each others, my golden caramel colour to his rich milk chocolate. He starts kissing and sucking on my stomach and moves his way down to my privates.  I moan loudly in sheer extasy and urge him to come up and please me.  He's now face to face with me and enters me with one slow deep thrust!

I jump awake and starts searching my surroundings with my eyes.  I silently thank god that I'm still at my hotel room and that it was just a dream.

I need to get Tyson out of my head!

Since my dream a couple of hours ago, I've been feeling very sexy and turned on.  I've been walking around the suite touching my waist, my stomach, my breast.  I wonder why i have all this built up s****l tension;  maybe because I always wanted to have s*x and just never actually did, for one reason or the other.

A noise startles me and I realize that it's my phone,  "hey" i answer.

"Hey baby, what are you up to? "

"Nothing just hanging around,  why?" I question,  genuinely confused.

"Get dressed then, I'll be there in twenty"

"Why Ray, what's up?" And with that i hear the click on an ended call.  'What the hell' I question loudly. I don't even know where I'm getting dressed for.  I call back and i think he deliberately ignores me. 'Argh!' I yell out but defeated I decide to get dressed.  I decide on a black boyfriend jeans, a black sheer shirt and some boots. I guess I'm ready, if it's dinner he wants to take me too he should've said so, I look at myself in the mirror and smile in approval.  Damn I'm getting thick!

I hear the door open and I walk out to greet Ray, I deeply kiss him and throw my hands over his neck. The kiss lasts a while and he is passionately kissing me back, sinking his fingers into my waist. He dips his head in the croak of my neck and sucks on it, he starts to unbutton my shirt still sucking on my neck, he pulls my shirt halfway down my arms and sucks from my neck down to my shoulder and it's getting intense and starting to hurt. I try to raise my hand to protest and it gets restricted from my shirt; he smiles and says "I think I like you bounded like this" he kisses me deeply again and I don't protest, I kiss back. "Where are we going?" I eventually pull back and ask. "To bed" he mumbles in my ear and i can hear him smiling.  "You did not make me get dressed for nothing".

"You got dressed so i could take it off" he laughs. "I'm just playing,  we can finish this later" he speaks into my mouth while kissing me.

He fixes my shirt and I button it myself and he holds the door open for me.  "Where are we going?" I ask peering out the window, looking at the beautiful setting sun.  "Have some patience geesh" he laughs, I decide not to push.

We pull up to a large home and its beautiful,  marble everywhere,  the theme is cream and gold.  I feel comfortable and relaxed in this scenery. "Goodday Dr. Johansson" the receptionist says.  He nods.  She phones someone and says "Suzie he's ready" in about thirty seconds a middle aged woman appears and says "Right this way please Dr." she leads us down the hall and I'm following her alongside Raymond in sheer confusion because I still don't know what type of business this is and why does Ray know them so well.  We stop at a door,  its all glass but you can't see beyond it because of the heavy curtains.

I step in and realize that it's... a spa? I look at Ray "I know you need some relaxation because you have been stressing latey so I thought you might enjoy getting a massage, it might even relax you a bit more for later" he winks and smirks. I laugh at his attempt at flirting,  "thank you sweetie, I will most definitely enjoy a massage and a few other things"

"Well anything for you, you know that" and he puts his hand around my waist.

Suzie finally acknowledges my presence and addresses me, she introduces herself, "Hello, I'm Suzie Banfield and I...." her thoughts linger and she stares at my ring, while holding her hand out for mine. I shake her hand and catch a glimpse of her peeping at Raymond’s hand.  To see if he's wearing one perhaps? "I'll be your hostess this evening" she completes her thought.

How could they be so formal and not know he's married?  I immediately get upset but I decide not to spoil the evening and jump to conclusions as Ray seems so oblivious to whats going on.

We're getting our massages and Ray reaches for my hand.  He squeezes it and I quickly think back to what happened earlier so I slowly pull my hand away.  He doesn't protest.

After the massage he asks what I want to do next, I decide that I will not do anything and we leave.  He orders food from a restaurant for pickup and doesn't even ask me what I wanted.   Maybe because I haven't been answering to anything else that he has asked so far on the drive back to the hotel.

"Ray, how do you know those women?"

"Isn't it clear that I've been there before?"

"Please dont answer my questions with questions, why did she look at me like that when she saw my ring?"

"How did she look at you?" He says with an arched eyebrow.

"Like she was shocked,  how could she or rather they, not know you were married?"

"Probably because we're not friends,  maybe she just never noticed"

"Have you been there more than once?"

"Yes"

"How many time have you been there?" I asked shocked.

"A couple of times, I don't know"

"How could you not know, we've been here less than two weeks"

"Is that even important Alicia" he shouts.

I don't respond, I don't question anymore.

I know he has secrets, big ones and I'm going to find out what they are!