Anecdotes of misers(2)
1751 Words
7. All misers!
There was a tribe famous for its avarice; when a guest arrived at a person of the tribe and remained a long time, the host said to him: “Have you had lunch this day? »
If he said yes, the host said to him: “Unfortunately if we hadn't had lunch, I would have offered a good lunch for you!’’
If he said no, the host would say to him: “Unfortunately if you had had lunch, I would have served you five cups!’’
Thus the guest would not taste anything in all the cases.
8. Entirely misers!
It is also told that a stranger asked a child from a miser tribe who was playing: “Give me bread!”
The child answered: “You would not like It, it's bitter!”
The stranger: “Just some water!”
The child: “It is salted! It's not good for you!”
The stranger continued to ask him many things, each time the child answered he would not like it and that it had defects.
His father, who was attending the scene -very proud, with a -, answered (shrugged) and said: “What can we do? It's our inheritance!”
9. I don't know absolutely who are you!
A man famous for his avarice traveled much for trade. He lodged with a generous man in Baghdad; who took care of him and offered to him all the means of comfort and rest.
The miser always said to him: “I wish that you visit me one day, I will give you a good reception, but here you don't need me. »
After a certain time, the generous host visited an area close to the miser; it made him comforted of travel tiredness thinking that his former guest would be going to take care of him. He moved towards him with the travel clothes, his turban, and his cape.
He greeted the miser cordially, but this one was so careless that the generous man thought of clothing as being the cause. He removed the turban and then looked again at his former guest, smiling. But the miser didn't show any sign of recognition!
The generous still believed that it was necessary to remove more clothing; he took off the bonnet; the miser thought that there is nothing remained to remove and no excuse would therefore have. He said to the generous man: “Even if you would be n***d, I would never recognize you! ’’
10. Uninvited guest!
It seemed that a guest would like to remain a long time at a miser family.
The host asked his wife “What do you think? How to know when it will leave?”
She said: “let us simulate an argument and ask for his arbitration!”
The woman said to the guest: “By Allah who will bless your departure tomorrow, who is the unjust among us?”
The guest answered: “By Allah who will bless my stay at your home for one month, I have no idea!”
11. Between the great linguist Abu Al-Aswad Al-Du-Ali and a nomad
A nomad stopped in front of Abu Al-Aswad Al-Du-Ali who was lunching, the nomad greeted them, and the linguist greeted them too, and began to eat without inviting the nomad.
This latter, wanting to start the discussion, said: “I passed through your family”
The linguist: “It was your way! ’’
The nomad: “Your wife is pregnant! ’’
The linguist: “I left her likewise”
The nomad: “She had two children”
The linguist: “Her mother had likewise! ’’
The nomad: “One child died”
The linguist: “She could not breastfeed two children! »
The nomad: “The second died too! ’’
The linguist: “He could not live after the death of his brother! »
The nomad: “The mother died then! ’’
The linguist: “Sad to leave her sons”
The nomad: “Your dish is delicious! ’’
The linguist: “That's why I ate it alone! ’’
The nomad left in silence!
12. Between the great linguist Abu Al-Aswad Al-Du-Ali and a nomad
A nomad passed close to Abu Al-Aswad Al-Du-Ali in front of his house, and he greeted him.
The linguist said to him: “what's wrong nomad ’’
The nomad: “Let me enter your home! ’’
The linguist: “Elsewhere it's wider than at my home! »
The nomad: “ Have you some things to eat? ’’
The linguist: “Yes”
The nomad: “So give me something to eat! ’’
The linguist: “My children deserve more than you this meal! »
The nomad: “By Allah, I never saw more nasty than you! ’’
The linguist: “By Allah, you didn't see yourself! ’’
13.Between Al-Hajjaj
and an old nomad.
One day, Al-Hajjaj stopped close to a source of water to rest; he asked to eat and ordered that they bring somebody to keep him company.
They found an old nomad who was sleeping; they shook him with the feet and asked him to come to see the governor.
He said to him: “Wash your hands and come to lunch with me! ’’
The nomad answered: “Somebody better than you invited me! ’’
The governor: “Who invited you and he is better than I? ’’
The nomad: “It's Allah who invited me to the fast and I abstained from drinking and eating! ’’
The governor: “On this very hot day? ’’
The nomad: “I have fast on a hotter day! ’’
The governor: “Don't fast today and fast tomorrow! ’’
The nomad: “OK! If you ensure that I will live until tomorrow!’’
The governor: “You are asking something impossible to achieve Bedouin! ’’
The nomad: “So why you are asking me for something closer in exchange for something distant which you cannot ensure? ’’
14. Close the door!And bring to eat!
A miser man said to his server slave at the time of getting lunch: “Bring to eat and close the door!”
The server answered: “Wrong sir! But rather: Close the door! And bring to eat
The miser said: “Oh! You are free now! Because you are a master!”.
15. Achaab the greedy!
Achaab was a lazy man; he had lived in the beginning of the appearance of Islam (VII century), He would have lived around 100 years of his life. Very famous for taking pleasure in eating and drinking; He enjoyed laughing and sleeping and especially eating a lot, and all in a climate of laughing and pleasure. He went to the feasts without invitation!
The currency that gave birth!
A handmaid left one dinar at Achaab to keep it a certain time. Achaab hides it under the bed in front of her, as a sign to preserve it.
After a few days, she returned asking Achaab for her money: “Achaab, I want my dinar! ’’
He said to her: “Take its baby under the bed!’’
She found her dinar and another coin a dirham.
She took the dirham and left the dinar.
she returned after a few days and found also another dirham baby and took it.
She still returned a third time and took likewise this baby-dirham.
But at the fourth time, as soon as Achaab saw her coming, he started crying. She said to him: “Why are you crying? ’’
He answered: “your dinar died after a miscarriage”
She said to him: “Are you joking? How a dinar can miscarry? ’’
He answered; “Cursed! You believe in babies-dirhams; why do you not believe in miscarriages?”
Action! We are eating!
Having heard his amusing stories, A prince invited Achaab for a great dinner.
At the dinner table, while waiting for dishes, the prince asked Achaab to tell a small joke.
Achaab started to say:
“There was a man…” Then he felt smoke in the air and dishes were put, Achaab stopped speaking without moving (about to devour food!); the prince asked him: “What happened to the man? Achaab ” Achaab answered: “He died”. The prince laughed a lot.
Asking for a loan from Achaab
A man wanted a loan from Achaab, saying to him: “ I would like to borrow an amount of money from you and to give me a good timeliness to pay you back Achaab answered: “I cannot make both, one thing only!”
The man said: “ I agree”
Achaab said to him: “ I 'll give the longest time, but I 'll never lend you!”.
Have mercy on the kid!
Achaab was invited by a man for a feast dinner.
A good kid was posed on the table. Achaab started to eat with greediness. The host said to him then: “I see that you eat the kid without pity as if you were gored by its mother!
Achaab answered: “And as for you, you eat the kid tenderly as if its mother nursed you! ’’
Donkeys recognize each other!
A man passed close to Achaab conducting his donkey, he said with irony: “I recognized your donkey, while I did not recognize you!”
Achaab answered: “I am not surprised; Donkeys recognize each other!”
Take revenge on fish!
Some Men were eating fish when they heard Achaab wanting to enter.
They said: “This Achaab eats the best only, plus he eats a lot! Hide this big fish on the other side in order not to eat it”.
Then they allowed Achaab to enter, and said to him:
“What do you think of fish? »
He said: “By Allah! I hate it so much! My father died in the sea; he was eaten by fish”
They said to him: “Go, take revenge for your father! Devour it! »
He sat down to eat, took the small fish, and put it close to his ear, then he said to them: “You know what this small fish has said ’’
They said: “No idea! ’’
He said: “The small fish has informed me that it has not been born yet when my father died, and it's the big fish in the dish which devoured my father; I must take revenge on it and eat it immediately! ’’
- Writer
