The Alpha's Cursed Healer

THE ONE SOFT PLACE

ARIA WINTERS

I wake up to someone knocking on my cabin door while it's still dark outside. It's probably like five in the morning and I'm not even remotely ready for a healing session with Kael.

I pull on the clothes they left me and splash water on my face. My hair's a mess but whatever. It's not like he cares what I look like.

When I open the door, Tomas is standing there looking like he hasn't slept either.

"The Alpha wants you at his study," he says. "Now."

The walk to Kael's study feels longer than it probably is. My stomach's doing this stupid thing where it keeps flipping and honestly, I hate it.

I hate that I'm nervous about seeing him after yesterday. I hate that I keep replaying the way he looked at me right before he left.

Stop it, I tell myself. He's mated to Celeste. That look probably didn't mean anything.

Tomas stops at the entrance of a big building. It seems Kael's study isn't in his pack house like my former pack’s Alpah’s.

The study is huge. Dark wood everywhere, books on the walls, a window that looks out over the whole compound. He's standing by the window when I walk in and he doesn't turn around.

"Close the door," he says, his voice low.

I do and it's suddenly very quiet in here. Very just-him-and-me quiet. My heart begins pounding hard again, the way his back is turned me, I can't help but take in his whole feature. Even in his jacket, I can make out his crazily ripped structure.

Damn Aria, stop.

"I owe you an apology," he says finally, turning around. "For last night. I shouldn't have come at you like that."

I blink at him because that's not what I expected. Am I dreaming? No, this has to be a dream.

Alphas don't apologize. That's like, a rule or something. They're always stoned-hearted. What is he doing?

I clear my throat. "You were protecting Sienna. I get it."

He walks closer and I can see something in his face that wasn't there yesterday. It's softer, but also like he's tired. Really tired.

"She's been through a lot," he says quietly. "Her parents died two years ago and she was alone for days before we found her in a crawlspace all by herself." His jaw gets tight as he talks. "I couldn't protect them. I was training, I wasn't here, and I couldn't save them."

I don't say anything because what do you even say to that? He's standing there telling me why he's so messed up about Sienna and I'm just supposed to respond with what, sympathy?

"Since then she's been my responsibility," he continues. "The only person I trust…." He stops and rubs his face. "She matters more to me than anything. If something happened to her because of you being here, I wouldn't forgive myself."

"I get it," I say again, and I actually do. I'm not trying to be weird about it but I get what he's saying. He's terrified of losing her and I showed up and suddenly his cousin is crawling through my window trying to be my friend and he panicked.

"I know you didn't ask her to come," he says. "But I need you to understand how serious this is."

"I do understand." I respond, trying as much as possible to keep my face straight. Can't afford to say anything that'd trigger him right now. There are no iron bars here to restrain him from snapping my neck. Can't risk that.

"She's not scared of me though.” I continue. “And maybe that's not a bad thing for her."

He stops moving and just looks at me for a second. Oh God… those eyes. I get so lost in them I almost forget how to breathe for a second.

"That's probably true," he finally says. His voice is different now. Just like… normal. "But she still can't come here unsupervised. I'm here or Tomas is here or someone I trust is here. Got it?"

"Got it," I say.

He nods and for a second I think this is it, he's done talking to me and I'll go back to my cabin and everything will be fine and normal and I can stop thinking about the way he looks at me.

But then he turns back around and he's just looking at me. The mate bond suddenly starts pulling at my chest and I swear I can feel it, like an actual physical thing.

His jaw tightens and I can see him like, fighting something. He's fighting his wolf, or fighting the bond or I don't even know what he's fighting but he's definitely fighting it.

For a second I think he's going to say something important. Something that would change everything.

But then, his whole face goes cold and distant and he looks away from me.

"Healing session. Tomorrow morning," he says, and his voice is back to being formal and Alpha and nothing like the guy who was just standing here telling me about his dead aunt. "Don't be late."

“Yes”

His head snaps to me immediately, his eyes dark. “Yes what?”

Oh s**t, my brain picked immediately. “Yes, Alpha Kael.”

“Good.” He says coldly.

He walks to his desk and sits down like I'm already gone, like I'm not even in the room anymore.

“Get out.”

I stand there for a second waiting for something else but nothing comes. He just starts looking at papers on his desk like I'm invisible.

So I leave.

My heart's pounding and I'm so angry at myself for how much that stupid look affected me. For how much I wanted him to say something. For how much I wanted him to keep looking at me like that.

He's mated to Celeste. He has a mate. And I'm just the rogue he felt sorry for for like two seconds. Why the won't my heart listen to me?”

Stop it, I tell myself as I walk back to my cabin. Stop being stupid. Stop falling for someone who literally doesn't care about you and already belongs to someone else.

But my stupid heart doesn't listen.

****

That night I can't sleep.

I keep thinking about the way his eyes changed when he looked at me. I keep thinking about how scared he is of losing Sienna and how that scared side of him is somehow more attractive than the Alpha side and that's messed up because he's literally terrified and I'm over here getting butterflies about it.

I'm lying in bed at like three in the morning just staring at the ceiling when something happens.

My empathic senses brush against the bond without me trying to do it. It's like I'm not even controlling it, it just happens on its own.

And what I feel from Kael's side makes me sit straight up in bed. He's not asleep either. He's thinking about me.

He's like, thinking about me hard. His thoughts are all over the place and messy. I can feel the frustration in them.

I pull my hand back from the bond and disconnect from it. Perks of being an empath, you can disconnect from your bond for a while.

But I can still feel him on the other side of it. He's still thinking about me.

I lie back down. A loud thought keeps ringing in my ears. Kael Shadowborn is on the other side of this pack compound thinking about me.

And I'm thinking about him too.

And this is the worst thing that could possibly happen because the bond is already killing me slowly and now I know he can't stop thinking about me either and he's mated to someone else and I'm supposed to just what, ignore this?

How the f**k am I to be around my fated mate who’s somehow mated to my enemy?

I'm so screwed.