The Girl And Her Love

#59

I never knew or thought our story would be over so early, but it is. We’ve said goodbye. I thought and hoped we would last forever. I didn’t see this as our future. But things happen for a reason. We just cannot escape from anything.

I still believe we can be soul mates. Losing you feels like losing a part of me. I will always love you, miss you, want you. But I know I do not mean anything to you. But enough is enough. I just cannot wait like a fool anymore.

I am in so much pain right now that I actually dream of a time in the future when missing you won’t hurt so much. I cherish our good memories and hope those always stay on my mind. Time and distance will help heal this wound. No one can know how painful things are. It is very difficult for me to be with this pain. But I know things cannot go this way. Something or the other needs to change.

Our bond has breakup and we no more friends this realization makes me sad because of all that you are. And who we became as a friend.

There are aspects of our time together that I will continue to celebrate. You taught me a lot. I know you have been an important part of my life but I just do not know how to handle things, if I cannot go for anything, I will go for this only.

How those early days went from awesome to nightmare, I don’t know. I only know that we hurt each other in the end.

I won’t blame either one of us for doing things that ultimately destroyed us. But somewhere or the other if you wanted you could have considered me/ but you did not consider me.

I do not know why you did not consider. For once only you could have considered me.

Although I will focus on the positive, it’s the mistakes we made along the way, but things could have been surely better than what it is now. It should have been better than what it is.

When I decided that I should opt to move on, I was afraid. It meant I was losing myself and therefore losing you. But I know I you are not mine. One fine day I will surely ask you what was my mistake. Why I did so.

What is wrong in me. What is it that is in other guys.

What is it that you cannot see in me.

I am not that bad.

I know things are not on right path, but I will make them fall on right path.

I just cannot imagine what will I do alone. I cannot do anything. I know, I cannot be as strong as I am.

But I will have to be.

I will have to find things which will help me to come out of this.

I cannot be like this. Each and everyday is becoming so suffocating.

It ain’t easy, but I need to. I am not at all genius in this. But I will do this only.

I will do things which will be good for me. Enough of being good.

I will no more be good to anyone. I deserve happiness and I will get that happiness anyway.

If options were only created, I would escape with you. But I know this cannot take place. We both cannot be together.

I want to hold you tight and not leave you. I want to be with my love. You happen to be my love, but I cannot be with you Ria.

What type of decision is this of god.

God created love, but in everyone’s life love should be there.

God should think before deciding anyone’s destiny.

I always believed we can conquer it, like those endless random small fights we were just laughing at. But now I got to know we both can never be together. We are meant to be apart. This realization hurts me. I want to be happy.

But I do not think that god wants me to be happy.

Loving someone is very easy. Saying someone that I love you is also very easy. This can be an easy thing to do, but because loving can sometimes shatter you, I am letting you go. I know it is not at all easy but I cannot let things go. I cannot kill myself each and every day. I just cannot ruin my life just because of one girl. I deserve happiness and I will get that happiness. If that happiness is in staying away from you then I will do this only. I will stay away from you.

There were times I believed that I was born for you, a nd you were born for me. but now I feel like you are not for me.

We both are nlt for each other. We can never ever be together.

At times that I crossed my fingers, i used to think about you and only you. I wanted to live my life with you. the dream which I always dreamt was with you and only.

In my dreams you were there.

I always wanted that my dream to come true. But I know my dream can never ever come true.

Things will not change.

Things are going to be this way only.

If god was grateful, he would have given me chance. but he never wanted that you, will be part of my life. and thought we were created to make each other happy beyond our imperfections. But I guess, all I could only do was wishful thinking.

I tried fighting our indifferences, the distance, the boredom that suddenly took shape and neither of us realized those fights were bound to end in some ways. We reached the point where we both got tired and just let things happen, and everything happened against one’s wishes. Maybe we were happy, or maybe we were not anymore.