Unrequited Love

one

I have been and let myself consumed by depression. I tried to seek for something that was there but I was too blinded by the fact of getting my heart broken again--afraid of being left by the person, afraid of losing myself because of that person.

Why love and give your all to a person who can never return what you have given to them? I am left with nothing. I swallowed my pride and dignity, trying to love... you.

Gerwyn Eros. Gerwyn means fair love and Eros, the Greek god of love. His name was Gerwyn Eros, the person I loved but doesn't seem to love me back. 

It was an unrequited love.

6 months ago... before I met you.

I ran faster than I ever did before. I dragged my feet towards the big city of New York, in hopes of getting them lost. I stopped in a nearby store and tried to catch my breath as I turn my head back, checking if they were still chasing me. Those dirty pigs only wanted my money. 

I've been living here in New York City for almost two years and I needed to go back home because my visa is about to expire in 6 months. I don't have enough money to renew my visa. Juggling three jobs is not enough to make a living for myself since I have to send some money back home to my Mom in Australia. 

My dad left us once we got here in the United States. He brought me here to get a job with him, not knowing he'll be fetching a woman while he was on a job hunt. After love struck him, he left me and my mom to get married.

I was depressed and lost control of myself but, I managed to stand up again to make a living for my mom. She was sick and mostly dying, while I, on the other hand, was also dying... inside.

"Hey, mom!" I answered her call. I wiped away my tears and forced a smile on my face. My voice was shaky and I tried my best not to stutter.

"When are you coming back?" My mom asked. "The money you sent me is enough, I don't need more. I just want you back here," She says. 

Medical bills are always expensive and keep getting higher and higher. "Mom, if you want me to stay with you then do me a favor and stay alive for me as well," I told her. "I don't want to get an email again from the hospital, saying that you're declining the treatments."

"Evie, I am old and maybe death is really my call," She says with a hint of sadness in her tone.

"No, it will never be your call as long as you don't answer it. I am working for us, okay? So, work with me as well and stay alive. That's all I'm asking for and in six months, I'll be home. Just, wait for me, okay?" I say in a worried tone.

"Okay. I love you," She says before ending the call.

New York City is one of the cities that are full of hardworking people. Anywhere you look, everywhere you go, you'll see people with their briefcases and handbags that match with their formal outfits. Them, being busy either holding a cup of joe or answering a call from their boss.

It was the city of dreams, it still is but for me, not anymore. It was tough working here and it is hard to also say that this place is safe, knowing that there are a bunch of criminals wandering around the city. Who knows? maybe it's this guy in front of me, or that guy holding a briefcase or that guy who is wearing a neat black coat or maybe... him. The guy wearing a black leather jacket in the middle of the summer.

I scanned him from head to toe and the way he holds his cigarette. It takes him five seconds to intake the tobacco from his cigarette then it takes him three seconds to release it out of his nostril and mouth. He suddenly looks at my direction and I manage to look away fast. 

Maybe people spectating is a bad habit of mine. I find it also rude when people stare at me for some unknown reason, but I don't know what other people think when I stare at them and what goes into their mind whenever I stare at them and scan them from head to toe--even though scanning people from head to toe is a sign of disrespect in my family.

I continue walking and I can see from the corner of my eye that the guy threw his cigarette and started walking away... he's walking towards me and my mind is telling me to walk faster. Maybe my maybe was right, that he is a criminal. Thinking about the fact made me my feet run.

Maybe he was one of those dirty pigs that were trying to steal my money earlier.

I ran as fast as I can, pushing people out of the way without being polite. It was hard for me not to say 'excuse me' when I'm in a rush. "Wait," I hear a voice behind me. I didn't look back and just continue to run. My guts were telling me it will slow me down if I turn my head back whilst running.

I started to slow down because I was running out of breath. I turn around and didn't see the guy. I guess he wasn't following me after all? "Hi," I hear the same voice earlier. I jump when I saw the guy that was wearing a leather jacket and was smoking from afar away earlier. He was now right in front of me.

"Uh, hi?" I said as I straighten up and looked at him. He's kind of cute to be a criminal. No, don't be fooled by his looks. "Do I know you?" I asked.

He chuckles lightly, what's so funny?  "I just saw you from afar earlier and you were... looking at me? if I'm not mistaken," He says. 

"And?"

"And I was wondering if you needed something?" He says and I just looked at him with a questioning look. He stepped an inch towards me, making me take an inch backward. He took a bigger step this time, making me almost stumble. 

"Wh-what are you doing?" I stuttered as I find him walking towards me, making me slightly uncomfortable. "I-I-I'm calling the c-cops," I stuttered again as I suddenly lost my balance. He puts his arm around my back, supporting my weight which caught me off guard.

I suddenly push him and knocked him in his balls with my knee. He crouched in pain, "What was that for?" he asks as he winces in pain and I can't help but cringe by looking at him.

"You're robbing the wrong person here!" I said as I started walking away from him. I walked towards the alleyway that leads me towards my apartment. It was a couple of blocks away from the city but the area where my apartment was is really creepy whenever you walk alone at night and by now, the sun is already setting.

I pulled out my phone inside my pocket and my earphones inside my bag. I plugged my earphones in my phone and started scrolling through my playlist. I put the right earphone on my right ear while I was walking and I suddenly stopped in my tracks when I saw a girl being picked on by a bunch of guys at the corner of the alleyway. 

I removed my earphone and placed them both (my phone and earphone) inside my bag. My eyes darting at the boys that were shouting at the girl, "Hey!" I shouted as loud as I can. Three of the boys that were about sixteen years of age looked at me and gave me a questioning look. 

"What do you want old lady?" I hear the black-headed boy say as he walked towards me. I walked towards the three of them and gave them a nasty look. "Mind your own business!" He says after as he turns his head back and continues what he was doing.

"No," I said. Three of them look at me and gave me a questioning look once again. "Let her go," I said as I smile. 

Three of them laugh and I can't help but roll my eyes at how pathetic they look. "Uh... no," The brunette headed boy says as he grabs the wrist of the little girl. The girl started screaming making me angry.

"I said... let her go!" I grabbed the brunette headed boy's wrist and twisted his arm. He screams in pain as the black-headed boy and the other brunette headed boy walked towards me to help their other friend. "Come near me and I'll do the same to you both."

They stopped midway with fear in their eyes. I dragged the boy that I was holding towards me and started whispering into his ear, "You guys do this again to her, you three won't like what's going to happen next," I say. I let him go as he walked towards his friends with fear.

"Le-let's go," The black-headed boy stutters. "This won't be the last!" He screams as they all run away.

I look at the blonde-headed girl who was sitting on the concrete floor, bawling her eyes out. "Hey, are you okay? What did they do to you? Are you hurt?" I asked as I scan both of her arms and legs.

"N-no," She stutters. "I'm fine."

"That's good to know," I say as I stood up and helped her up. "Get home safe," I told her as I started walking towards the end of the alleyway when I suddenly stop when I heard her speak again.

"Th-thank you," She stutters once more. 

I looked back and put my hand on my hip, "You know what I'll be most thankful of? When a girl knows how to stand up for herself," I told her as she looks at me with a questioning look and a tear still running down her cheek. "We girls don't need to wait for a knight and shining armor to save our asses. We are humans too and we need to learn how to stand up for ourselves because no one else will."

I started walking again, "I promise to stand up for myself!" She shouts as I continue walking without turning my head back. 

"Good to know!" I shouted back as soon as I reached the end of the alleyway. A couple of old guys were blocking my way towards my apartment. "Excuse me," I told them and they all gave me a mean look.

"Do you need anything?" I asked. They didn't say a word but instead, they gave me a nasty look. "I need to pass, please excuse me," I told them as I try walking past them but they won't let me.

I threw my bag up the electric box that was outside the apartment beside me so that if they ever rob me, they have nothing to get from me. I cracked my neck from each side and as well as my knuckles. "What?" I say in a tempting tone, hinting them to walk away instead of getting into trouble.

The two guys walked towards me, they were about twenty years old. "You're the woman that shouted at my little brother," He says as he gave me an angry look.

"Your little brother was picking on a little girl back there in the alleyway," I told him as I pointed back at the alleyway behind me. He looked at me in the eyes and I continue to stare.

"I don't like to fight girls but girls like you are the ones that needs get beaten up," He says. He raises his hand in the air, ready to slap me in the face and suddenly my hands turn into a ball of fists within seconds and I aim towards his stomach, punching him as he falls back down on the concrete floor.

"Don't mess with girls who know taekwondo," I said as I made a hook kick, aiming towards his face as soon as he stood up from the ground. He falls back down once again. His other friend looked at me angrily and started approaching me.

"You little--"

I threw a push kick and aimed towards his crotch area so that he wouldn't be able to stand up too. He falls back down and I stare at them both as they wince in pain. I walked towards the electricity box, jumping up to retrieve my bag. I sling it on my shoulder and walked back towards them as they still wince in pain.

I cringe at them, "You guys are from the hood yet you don't know how to throw a proper fight. Next time when you do, learn how to do it first," I said as I started walking again when suddenly, my hair was being pulled.

I took a grip of the wrist that was holding my hair and reached up with my other hand, sliding my fingers around the person's pinkie and used my hair to get under their hand. I peeled the pinkie back to the back of the person's hand and slide away from his free arm while I bend his fingers back and took a step back immediately, creating space for myself to escape. I was about to escape when suddenly, the guy that was pulling my hair was being grabbed by his shirt and knocking the daylights out of him with just a single punch.

I look back up and stare at the leather jacket guy, he followed me all the way here. "Are you a stalker?" I asked as I sling my bag properly on my shoulder. "Or are you just here to continue robbing me?" I asked again.

He shakes his head and throws a pit of laughter in the air, "You are so funny," he says as he makes this weird yet cute looking face while trying to catch some air.

"Aha," I say as I started walking towards my apartment. 

"I think I need a reward? A simple 'thank you' would do," I hear him say behind me. I turn my head back at him and gave him a look in the eyes as I plaster a straight face.

"I wasn't asking for any help," I say.

"Well, it looks like you needed one," He says.

"No. If I needed one, I should've shouted already. But I didn't," I say.

"Jeez, woman. You're so hard to please," He says as he sighs. I rolled my eyes and c****d my head to the side. "When a woman is saved by a guy, they say thank you but for you... is it that hard to say 'thank you'?" 

I rolled my eyes again, "Thanks for helping but you shouldn't have," I say as I walked towards my apartment. Sighing as I heard no words after what I said. Only a few more steps and I'll be reaching my apartment.

I started fishing inside my bag to get the keys for the front door when suddenly a head pops beside me, making me jump. "You're still here?" I say in an angry tone as I looked at him.

"I don't think that was sincere," He says.

"You are so..."

"Cute. Charming. Handsome. Heroic. Yes, I know. Thank you," He says making me roll my eyes from his cockiness. "I think if you roll your eyes once more, you'll never be able to roll them back to its original place."

"Ha-ha, very funny," I say as I continue fishing inside my bag. 

"See, I am also a humorist," He says as he plasters a cheeky smile on his face.

I gave him an annoyed look. "Can you not follow me? If you need anything, say it already. I don't have time for you," I say as I fish inside my bag, trying to get the keys. 

"Look, if you can't say thank you at least let me take you out on a date," He says making me a little dumbfounded by what he said. "I like girls who know how to throw some amazing kicks," He says as he imitated the way I threw a taekwondo kick at the guy earlier.

"You can't handle a girl like me," I say and he suddenly stops imitating me and gave me a look in the eyes. He took a step towards me as he did earlier while I, on the other hand, didn't move this time. 

This is guys' way to lure girls into their arms. He stops when he forwards his face an inch away from mine and plasters a smirk on his perfectly sculptured face, "I like you..." He says as he takes a step back. "You're..."

"Cute. Charming. Pretty. Awesome. I also know that" I say and he chuckles. 

He stares at me the way I used to stare at a guy before--a stare that says you're attracted to them and my guts were telling me that this won't end well for the two of us. "Go on a date with me," He says with a straight face, his eyes still staring into mine as if he can see right through my soul.

I stare back at his hazel-brown eyes and I find myself smiling while I stare at them. I c****d my head at the side again as if I find myself being lost in his eyes, "No," I smile widely.  He blinked his eyes and I turned my back at him, opening the front door. 

He grabs my wrist and stops me from entering my apartment," Please, let me take you out on a date. Just one and you can decide whatever's next," He says as he plasters a genuine smile on his face.

"I don't date criminals," I say as I walked up towards the door.

"I am not a criminal," He says, making my head turn back. I put my hand on the door, stopping it from closing and looked at him very still. He looked genuine and something inside me somehow felt bad for saying that he was a criminal.

I gave him a look, "Prove it,"

"Let me prove it to you by getting to know me on a drink, tomorrow night," He says and I try to balance everything out. I feel bad for calling him a criminal, he looks cute and I guess a date with him won't hurt. It's not like I'm going to love him or anything. But, I have work tomorrow. My first job ends at one in the afternoon. My second shift ends at five and my last shift ends at nine. I really don't have time to fool around and go on dates whenever I want to.

"My shift ends at nine, I'm sorry. I can't," I say as I start closing the door when he puts his foot at the end, blocking it from closing. 

"I can wait for you."

I rolled my eyes and can't help but smile, "Fine, what time?" I gave in and asked.

He smiles at me, "After your shift, meet me at the pub by the bar. I'll wait for you," He says as he steps down the stairs and looks at me.

"Okay, I'll see you," I say as soon as I close the door.