Almost, Completely His

Chapter 8

Arthur

The slight wind made its way through Celeste’s hair and strands hit my face, tickling me ever so lightly and her soft citrus smell burned my nostrils.

Never had I wanted to be drowned in the touch and smell of a woman before.

I had felt lust before, but this... this need and deadly yearning was new.

“Can i kiss you?”

The words just slipped out without any hesitation.

Celeste gasped , her face flushing and eyes wide with excitement. The wild, curious and unhinged look I had seen in her eyes so many times was there again. And I loved that I was the one seeing it again.

“Arthur...” she whispered my name and I felt it like a soft caress all over me.

I leaned in closer, our noses touching and her chest pressed on mine. This closeness was what I craved. I wanted to be close to her. I began to lean down to press my lips to hers but she shook her head.

“Arthur don’t..”

I immediately took a step back, I felt a pang of repulsion and embarrassment. Had I made her uncomfortable? Had I scared her?

She must have sensed my emotions because she reached out and grabbed my hand.

“I’m sorry, I should have never been so forward.”

She shook her head , her eyes still wide and breathing ragged.

“It’s ok... i Just know if you would have started, you wouldn’t have stopped,” she bit her lip and despite myself I felt myself harden. “And I wouldn’t want you to stop.”

Her last sentence had my head spinning.

She wanted me, like I wanted her. She actually wanted me. I wanted to cheer, to pick her up and kiss her. But I refrained from doing so.

I let go of her hand and I saw her frown.

I desired her more than any woman I had come in contact with, but I wouldn’t ruin her. It didn’t matter that she wanted me, I was in no place to seduce her.

It wasn’t my place to kiss her, touch her, smell her or teach her the ways of pleasure. I would not take advantage of her young years and innocence. I wasn’t that kind of man and I knew I’d never be in the position to teach her.

“We should get going.” I said nodding towards the trail leading back to the house. We were still far ways out. I began to walk and when I didn’t feel her beside me I stopped and looked back.

Celeste stood a couple feet away from me unmoving. Her eyes were wide and full of tears and her cheeks red, I had overwhelmed her. But before I could say anything she blinked the tears away and clenched her jaw. She lifted her face and joined me quietly as we walked back.

The rest of the walk was silent. When we had reached the house I escorted her to the hall that led to her room which was dangerous to be in close proximity of.

I apologized for the events of the afternoon, starting with the shooting range and ending with the almost kiss. As I bid my farewells I tried to memorize her face. The softness of her pale skin, the red of her lips, the wild dark ringlets of her hair and black eyes framed with thick lashes.

I wanted to remember her as she was, small, delicate, flushed and trembling with desire and anger. She’d surely avoid me from then on, I had insulted her in the most terrible of ways a man could insult a lady.

“Good day Miss Celeste.” I said nodding.

Celeste only held my eyes for a few seconds before turning around and walking away.

It surprised me how much I hated seeing her back to me and putting distance between us. When she reached her door and went inside, she slammed it shut. I stood at the top of the stairs, frozen and confused.

Only a day ago the idea of her being in my house made me sick. I didn’t want to have the wild child of my memories present, I knew that as an adult I’d hate her more.

But now, it was all different. She was a young woman, beautiful, elegant and strong. She was everything she used to be but she kept it hidden, but I still saw it. I saw her, and knowing that I was the only one who did-or only one who wanted to- drove me mad.

I willed myself to walk away and put more distance between us. It was the right thing to do.

Celeste

“How dare he?’ I muttered as a leaned against the wall next to the door of my room.

My body still felt hot and my legs were shaking. Well... everything was shaking and everything was hot.

The moment he leaned in and I felt his chest on mine I was falling... and when he asked to kiss me I knew it was too late. I wanted the blasted man.

I felt it to my very core. I wanted him to touch me, to kiss me, hold onto me in places he shouldn’t and claim me. I wanted it all... but if I hadn’t stopped it then we would have done something he’d regret.

He would have ruined me and then be forced to marry me. As soon as he stepped away from me I saw his eyes full of regret and it hurt my heart. He had realized his mistake and let his desire get the best of him, but he snapped out of it because no kiss was worth risking marrying me.

I felt tears in my eyes as I stood there, breathing hard and feeling my body tremble. Why Arthur? Of all people? Why now?

I had come to London in search for eligible prospects away from the peering eyes of Spain, but now I was in a cage with the only man who had ever made me feel desirable.

I thought back to his bright green eyes, strong jaw and strong body as he towered over me. It sent more heat through me and I felt it pool in my chest and between my legs.

Damn him. Damn him for making me want him so much.

But now I knew that he saw it as a mistake, a moment of weakness. Men like him always had women after them and offering themselves to them. I had almost become one of those, but I was real and so were the consequences that he’d never wish to bare.

I would stay away from him, occupy myself with something else. I’d do anything to stay away from him and protect my sanity and virtue.

Nothing would get in the way of that.