Finally

Chapter 15 - Very Convenient

Flashback

“Hello Miss, you’re going to be fine, I’m just trying to get you out ok? There will be a loud noise but please stay still don’t move or panic, you’re safe I promise,” a strange male voice says barely registering with me.

I hear a whirring noise then the scrape of metal against metal and sparks fly, as my focus clears there’s a metal saw right by my head. The man’s words have disappeared and I’m full on freaking out, I need to get out of here now, a scream leaps from my mouth as I start to try to move. Suddenly the noise stops.

“Miss, it’s ok. We’re just getting you out, please stay calm.”

“Please don’t ruin my car,” I cry, hearing my voice but I can’t really see or understand what’s happening, I'm confused.  Where am I?  What happened? What was the last thing I remember? Adam, Alice, the car...

“Your car is gone sweetheart,” he says a slight amused tone to his voice. “Please just relax and trust us, we will get you out safely.”

“Who are you?” I ask the stranger, I can’t see him properly or move to get a better view.

“Fire brigade, we’ve been asked to help get you out of the car. You’re trapped in there right now, but it won’t be for long. Just try to relax.”

I’m trapped in my car so this must be bad. s**t! Why is all this happening to me and why now on top of everything else?

The next voice I hear is different, still male but a different male, the voice is much deeper and more gravelly. 

“I'm a paramedic, I need to slide something down your back and put something round your head. Please try your best to relax and not move. You’re going to be ok,” he reassures.

I try to relax while he slides a solid board behind me and then places blocks either side of my head and wraps them tightly to secure them.

“We’re going to lift you out after three ok? Just try to breathe. 1, 2, 3...”

I feel pressure as I’m being lifted and then unbearable pain before it all goes black again.

When I open my eyes again I’m lying on a bed and my clothes are being cut from my body, my torso is exposed and I feel distressed by being half naked on a bed with strangers all around me. I try to get words out to find out what is going on, I want to ask them to at least cover my modesty with a blanket, but something is blocking the pathways in my brain and nothing comes out that makes any sense.

“Lie still as you can. As soon as we remove your clothes we will cover you with a blanket,” a strange female voice says as if reading my mind. “Then we’re taking you to x-ray.”

X-ray? Have I broken something?

The next thing I hear is a noise like a horn and a ringing sound.  There's a bright light and I can see I’m under a machine of some kind.  Nothing is very clear so I can't work out what is going on, it's all hazy as if I'm seeing things through a thick fog.

“What are you doing?” I manage to get out after several attempts.

“We think you may have a fracture in your spine,” a new person tells me.

Oh god no, not a broken back.

“The baby...” is all I manage before darkness comes and I pass out again.

I open my eyes again and I’m in a bed, I see the bright white sheets and a blue curtain all around. Alice is sitting next to me in a red plastic chair.

“Hey! You’re awake!” She says smiling.  It's a sympathetic, caring smile.  

“What happened? I remember talking to you and seeing the car, but then it’s really hazy.”

“You hit the car badly, we thought we were losing you at one point,” she says her eyes filling with tears.

“I remember being in X-ray...” I say hoping it’s good news.

“The doctors thought you’d broken your back, but luckily it was a sternum fracture from when you hit the steering wheel. They gave you morphine and you’ve been out for four days, you're going to be ok though you just need plenty of rest.”

“Four days? s**t!” Then I decide to ask the question that I’ve been dreading since being aware I was having to be cut out of my car. “The baby?”

“I’m so sorry Zara...” is all she can say and the tears finally spill over the edges of her eyes and roll down her face.

“I lost it...” it’s not a question, I already know the answer, it’s a statement.

She reaches out and holds my hand.

“My parents?” I ask.

“They know you’re here, they were told about the accident by the hospital, they know you were cut from the car and that you were in intensive care, they kept phoning for updates.  I don't know if they were told about the baby though."

“They didn’t come?” I ask in disbelief.

“No,” she says not meeting my eyes.  Even she thinks it was shitty of them to leave me here.

I know they are sick of my drama, they’ve told me enough times, but I never thought they’d leave me in a strange hospital in the middle of nowhere alone.  What if I had died, would they have come then?  

End of flashback.

“Did you tell Adam what happened with the baby?” Michelle asks.

“Yes, he wouldn’t take my calls so I text him to say I’d lost it. I didn’t expect him to be sad, but he had a right to know.”

“What did he say?”

“He said it was very convenient that I’d lost it when I realised he wasn’t interested. That I should just be honest and say I was faking the whole thing, he’d have more respect for me if I was honest.” I tell her, bitterness permeating every word.

I still find it difficult to talk about and when I leave Michelle’s office, I’m totally drained.  I need to get my s**t together quick because I’ve got my date with Jean tonight.

Maybe a sexy French man is just what I need to forget the pain and trauma of the past.