Guilty Pleasure

Betrayal

My best friend and my ex are all over each other. Are you kidding me?! "Hailey! What the hell?"

"Jalissa?"

"Oh!"

Hailey looks at me and steps away from Mike. She looks at him, nodding for him to leave us alone. "Sorry! Umm... I can explain."

"I'm listening."

"Mike and I hooked up once after you guys broke up, but it was nothing serious... at the time. Last night, when you said you'd be going out elsewhere... I asked him out. We just started to hook up. But I don't want to hurt you. I..."

"I get it. I shouldn't have ruined your time." 

Still feeling pissed, I turn around and walk away. I walk home even though it's late. I don't even know why this hurts me so much. I was done with Mike... But what hurts is the idea that I can't trust Hailey anymore. What if she was my friend just because she was after Mike? 

I get home and take a deep breath. The house is quiet when I enter. I should wipe my tears before... 

"Hello?" Damon shows up and I still look like s**t. Not even seeing him shirtless makes me feel better. "Have you been crying?"

"Yeah."

"What happened?"

"It's not a big deal. I'm over it."

"You don't look like you're over it. You're still crying. Why don't you tell me what's going on? Maybe I can help you."

"It's none of your business."

"Okay, then. I just thought that you'd like to get it off your chest. Well... if you need someone to talk to, I'm here."

My mind goes back to what I saw in the club. I feel tears slide down my cheeks. "She was my best friend, and she hooked up with my ex! I saw them kissing. It hurts." 

Damon pulls me in for a hug. I press my cheek against his chest, inhaling his cologne. It calms me down, just the sense of intimacy. "Shh, it's okay. You'll be alright. It's not that you still need him, right?"

"Well, no, but now that Hailey is in the picture... it's a different story. I can't forgive her. I can't forget a boyfriend-stealer. I trusted her, but she disappointed me."

"Mike isn't your boyfriend anymore. She didn't steal him from you."

"But what if they've been seeing each other while we dated?"

"Even if that was the case... That's... That's no worse than what we did to Kara, right? I won't judge us, or her... But I think you should give her a second chance."

"I understand. It still makes me sad, though."

"What you feel is normal. But I hope you're starting to feel better. Don't think about your ex. He doesn't deserve your attention."

"I know. I feel so stupid now." I laugh and Damon smiles. He tucked a loose strand of my hair behind my ear. 

Why is Damon comforting me if he wants us to keep our distance? How does he really feel about me? Does he see me as some stupid, immature girl who needs comfort? Or does he see a woman he's attracted to? "Damon, can I ask you something?"

"Sure."

"Do you think I'm stupid?"

"What kind of question is that? Of course not."

"Do just see me as just fun? Someone immature who doesn't know what to do with her life?"

"No! I mean... You probably haven't figured out what you want out of life yet. But that doesn't make you immature. You're just taking your time to figure things out."

"Oh. But... since you see me as an adult... Do you think you could seriously like me? I mean... not just for the fun, but for every part of me."

Damon smiles and slid his hand across my cheek. "You're hard to understand, Jalissa. That's what intrigues me about you. But the more I learn about you... the more I like you. I like how gentle you are, but you can also be rebellious at the same time. Sometimes you're the nicest and most sincerest girl I've ever met and sometimes you're a daring flirt. And it's confusing for me because... I'm not supposed to feel this way." 

Damon holds my hand and kisses my forehead. He looks at my lips as if he wants to kiss me, but steps away. "I'm sorry, I... I should go."

"No, Damon. You should stay. Please."

I reach for his arms and wrap them around me. I kiss him, just barely, before his lips escape mine. He's too tall... then he's not because he pulls me closer and lowers his head, and it's perfect. He gives himself fully this time, kissing me without restraint. One of his hands grab my butt and he lifts me off the floor.

Eagerly, I wrap my legs around him, and he carries me across the room. He props my back against the wall, freeing his arms to feel my body. He's so strong, it turns me on. Just the power in him. I hold onto his shoulders, tasting his lips again and again. I want to lie on top of him, I want... I want him. But I'm also scared that in a few seconds, he'll pull away again, breaking the trance I'm in. I kiss him and touch him.. and by the time my feet touch the floor again, I can barely stand. 

"Wow."

"You're quite wow yourself." 

He laughs then shakes his head. "Why can't I resist you?"

"Maybe it's chemistry."

"I'm afraid it might be more than that. But... let's say I'm single again... How would this work? You're still in college, and I'm over 30."

"I don't mind the difference. Besides, you're hotter than guys at my college." I lean in to kiss his bare chest. "And you're kinder and wiser. I love your maturity."

"I'm way too immature for my age, actually."

"I guess, like beauty, it's in the eyes of the beholder."

"Smartass."

"Hey, I'm trying to compliment you!" 

I laugh and he kisses me again. He takes my wrists and pins them to the wall above my head. His other hand finds its way under my clothes. Sliding, touching, and exploring me. When he pulls away from our kiss, there's wonder in his eyes. It's like he's enjoying every second of this.

Holding me in place, he kisses my jaw, neck, my cleavage. His hand brushes against my underwear, and I press myself against him, but he steps away. "Hmm... let's not take this too far."

"Damon..." I hug him before the magic ends. He accepts my hug, holding me for a moments and then gives me one short last kiss. 

"I like you so damn much. I don't know if I want this to go away."

"Give us a chance. Maybe we can make it work."

"Maybe." He smiles and takes my hand and pulls me toward the kitchen. "Come on, let me make you some food. I could use some too." 

We end up in the kitchen, talking over our dinner and then we watch a movie. It almost feels like a date and it's perfect. It does everything to make me feel better. 

*** The next day: Okay. I feel calmer today. I should meet with Hailey and talk to her. 

When I get to the café, Hailey is already there. She greets me with a nervous smile. "I'm so glad you showed up. I'm really, really sorry I didn't tell you about this sooner. I should have told you, but I was afraid that you were still into him. I mean, I wanted you guys to work, but..."

"Whoa, whoa, slow down. Can you tell me what's going on? Like, the whole truth?"

"Fine. The truth is... I've been crushing on Mike since last year. Then, after you guys broke up, and you looked like you moved on.... I thought it was the right time to make a move."

"Is that why you kept asking me questions about Mike? If I wanted to get back with him?"

"Yeah. I wanted to be sure the path is clear."

"Oh, Hailey. I wish you had just been honest with me."

"I know. I feel the same. I'm sorry for what I did. I hope you can forgive me."

"I forgive you. I don't see the point of staying mad at you over a guy I don't love anymore."

"Thank you. It means a lot."

"So, this things between you and Mike... Do you think it's the real deal?"

"Well, he seems to like me back. But you know, he's a player. I may not be the only one he hooked up with."

"I hope that's not the case. I mean, you can probably do better than Mike. But if he's the one you want, I hope he can make you happy."

"Thanks so much!"

*** Later that afternoon: I return home feeling a bit better about the whole situation. Damon doesn't seem to be here, which is weird... He should have this Sunday off. Hmmm... I think I know where he is. When I go in the garage, I feel my heart race. Because, just like last night, he's shirtless again. 

"Hey!"

"Hey." God, he looks so fine. "Trying to tease me with them abs?"

He laughs. "Hey, it's summer! I get hot when I work here." 

"I was just teasing... And I agree... you're definitely hot."

Smirking, he motions me to come closer. "I have something for you." Damon reveals a figurine of a fairy-like woman and gives it to me. 

"Wow. It's beautiful."

"It's for you."

"Are you serious?"

"Of course. I thought you'd need someone to cheer you up."

"That's a lot of effort to cheer me up."

"I enjoy my hobby. It's no effort, especially not when I'm inspired."

"What inspired you to make this?"

"Well, about that..." Damon takes a moment to respond. "It's a lot of things, but... Mostly, it's you. I tried to incorporate your beauty and strength in this one." 

"You're so good at this. You should hold an exhibit."

"I'll think about that. Wait, what's that noise?" 

We hear the door open somewhere. There's a sound of brisk confident steps, and then... "Surprise!"

"Kara?" 

Damon smiles at her awkwardly, and she leaps in his arms. 

Mom basically threw herself at Damon. This wakes me up to the realization that Damon has never been mine. "I was lucky I could book an early flight, so here I am! I missed you so much."

"I missed you too. You have no idea."

Yeah, you have no idea that I had s*x with your daughter. I roll my eyes behind mom's back. God, you're such a snake. What happened to "breaking up and moving away?" "Remember when I called you about Patricia Smith?"

"Yeah."

"Your advice helped a lot. Thank you."

"Well, I just..." Mom interrupts Damon with a kiss. 

This is so damn weird. I feel sick looking at this.

"So, why are you spending such a sunny day in the garage?" 

Damon points at the figurine. "I made this for Jalissa. She had a bad day, um, bad night... And I thought it could cheer her up."

"Oh, this doll business again..." She rolls her eyes.

"They're not dolls."

"Why don't we go to the kitchen and cook something? I'm starving."

"Uh, sure."

"So anyway, I'll go unpack and shower, and you get something ready." 

Damon presses his lips together, hiding his annoyance then replies, "Give me a few minutes to clean this mess up."

"Okay. Just my two sense... I think you should spend less money on these things. They're beautiful, but such a waste of time. Just like social media. Too much of them isn't good for you." 

I look at them, my interest intrigued. Romance: gone. 

"I know how to manage my time and money. Thanks for the advice though."

Damon sounds so cold. I hate myself for feeling happy to hear that. I slip out through the back door. I take a short walk around the neighborhoods, just to clear my head. Just to breathe. I wonder what happens next. Damon isn't stupid. I doubt he'll tolerate mom's selfish behavior for much longer. 

When I return, mom is in the kitchen, but there's no sign of Damon yet. "Why is he taking so long? I want some food." Mom mutters and focuses on her phone. 

"The garage can't clean itself."

"Yeah, but he's taking so long. Does he have any idea of how tired and hungry I am?"

"I'm sure he's doing his best to come as soon as possible."

"I doubt that. He has an unhealthy obsession with his metal sculptures. It's like an addiction and that makes him often unavailable when I need him."

"Oh, come on. Maybe you should respect his time and space." 

Mom looks at me, annoyed. "You know nothing about my relationship. Keep your opinion to yourself."

"There's no need to get upset. You have a good life. Enjoy it."

"But... I mean... You're right." She forces a smile. "There's no reason to get upset. I guess I should take a shower first. I'm sure I'll feel better afterwards." She leaves the room but leaves her phone behind. In a few moments, it begins to buzz on the counter. I see a notification banner. Its a text from someone called "Boss." 

Boss: I fantasize about you all the time. 

What?! Why would anyone send mom a message like that? Time to see the truth. 

I unlock the phone, guessing the pin and in disbelief, I scroll back into yesterday's chat history. 

Boss: I can't believe we did that last night.

Boss: You were great

Kara: You too. 

Kara: I didn't expect you to have that energy 

Kara: You exceeded all of my expectations

Boss: When can I see you again? 

Boss: My body already misses yours. 

Kara: Not sure, but I'll try to make time for you.

What the hell? 

I reach the latest messages, 

Boss: How's your day? 

Kara: Terrible. My boyfriend is acting like a toddler with all his doll s**t.

Boss: Has he cooked for you? You told me that's the only thing he's good at. 

Kara: No, and that's the worst part. I'll just go take a shower. I might fantasize about you in there. 

Boss: Oh... I fantasize about you all the time.

What the hell was that? Is mom cheating on Damon? 

Hearing footsteps, I drop the phone, hoping mom won't notice the new message is already read. She shows up seconds later. "What's wrong Jalissa? You look like you've seen a ghost." 

"I... uh..."