Chapter 6: The Confirmation
1418 Words
“I'm really pregnant, Ciara,” I said, my voice barely above a whisper as I squeezed her hand.
“How could I have let this happen?”
The Doctor in front of us cleared her throat to grab my attention.
“As much as I usually try to avoid doing this, Miss Parker, it's clear that you are underjoyed to receive this news, based on how many times you've repeated the statement, 'I'm really pregnant.' So, if you wish not to keep it, there are various options you could always explore.”
I raised my head to see her looking at me, her facial features taken over by a look of sympathy, as she stretched out two pamphlets for me to take.
“One of them lets you know all you should know about adoption, and the other lets you know all that you need to know about abortion. Should you wish to go in the direction of adoption, I could recommend a great agency that can handle it for you, and should you wish to go in the direction of abortion, I can also recommend the best clinic to get it done. Whatever you eventually decide, I'm here to help. You can always reach out to my office anytime, and you'll get the resources you need.”
I heard everything she said.
How could I not?
She was right in front of me, after all.
However, I didn't respond.
I couldn’t bring myself to.
“Thank you, Doctor. We’ll reach out to you once a decision is made,” Ciara answered on my behalf.
“No problem.”
“Come on, Mia. Let’s go.”
Ciara ushered me out of the office and then out of the hospital and into her car.
“I’m really pregnant, Ciara,” I said again.
This time, tears followed.
I had been fighting to hold back my tears while in front of the doctor, but I couldn’t hold it in anymore once we got into the car.
The last two weeks have been the worst fourteen days of my life.
It has been a serious mess.
From trying to deny the off feeling I felt in my body after my last encounter with Harry to taking the at-home pregnancy test and trying to convince myself that it was a false positive to now getting proper confirmation a week later that I’m actually pregnant, it’s been a whole spiral.
“We’re going to get through this, Mia. Don’t worry. I’m here for you,” Ciara offered me a tissue and squeezed my hand.
Ciara wasn’t in town for the entirety of her sick leave and I didn’t want to tell her all that had been going on over the phone, so as soon as she returned a week ago, I rushed over to her apartment to let her in on everything that had been going on in my life.
I can’t forget how the conversation played out that night.
“You slept with Harry Michelson?” Ciara shrieked.
“Twice,” I responded in a defeated manner.
“Twice?!” her voice ascended to an even higher pitch.
“Ciara, please. What’s happened has happened. There’s no need to yell at me over it now,” I said as I buried my face in my hands.
Ever since the test came out positive, my body has been messing with me in many different ways.
If it wasn’t my stomach that hurt or my back that was killing me, then I would have a terrible migraine.
At that moment, I was having the worst migraine yet, and Clara’s yelling wasn’t helping.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to yell at you,” she apologized and sat down on the couch opposite me. “I’m just really shocked by all of this. That’s all,” she continued and released a sigh.
“Not as shocked as me, that’s for sure,” I responded, tears welling at the corners of my eyes.
“So, do you like him or does he like you? I’m just trying to wrap my head around this whole thing.”
“No. I don’t like him, and I’m pretty sure he doesn’t like me either. I’m a server, Ciara,” I looked up at her and let out a dry laugh. “How could he ever like someone like me?”
She hissed.
“Don’t even start with that bullshit, Mia. A server or not, you’re an amazing person. So, whoever likes you and chooses to take you seriously would literally have managed to catch a rare gem.”
“Thanks.”
“Why are you crying?” she asked, her face filled with worry.
I didn’t even realize I had released the tears.
“Because whether he likes me or not isn’t the thing I’m more focused on right now, Ciara.”
“What do you mean?”
She came to join me on the couch I was sitting on and turned me around so we were facing each other.
“Talk to me,” she urged.
“I’m pregnant, C. I’m pregnant with Harry’s child.”
That was the first time since I took the test that I had said those words out loud, and as soon as they left my mouth, my stomach practically dropped.
I felt that if I didn’t confess it with my lips then it wouldn’t be real, but it was already a thing, so it couldn’t not be real, now, could it?
“What?”
Ciara finally managed to say something after being silent for a minute.
“How?… I mean I know how, but are you sure?”
“Well, I took the home pregnancy test, and it was positive, so yeah,” I chuckled dryly.
“You know those tests aren’t always accurate, right? I mean, it could’ve been a false positive, right?”
She looked hopeful that my predicament wouldn’t be true. Not because she wouldn’t support me, but because she knew it would crush me if it were real.
“I took five tests, C. All from different brands and each one was positive,” I answered, releasing a fresh batch of tears.
“Oh, Mia,” she immediately pulled me into a hug. “It’s okay,” she combed through my hair with her fingers to soothe me. “I’m here for you,” she continued in a reassuring tone.
“I don’t know what I’m going to do, C. My parents are going to be so disappointed in me,” I cried.
“Hey,” she pulled me away from her embrace so I could look her directly in her eyes. “I understand that this is going to be a tough road, but the first order of business is to go to an actual hospital to get tested so we know for sure that this is legit. Okay?”
“Okay,” I nodded, sniffling.
“Mia,” Ciara snapped her fingers to gain my attention.
“Yes?” I turned to face her.
“I’ve been trying to talk to you for the past five minutes and I didn’t get a response. Are you okay?”
I didn’t even realize I had been in my thoughts for that long.
“I’m fine,” I nodded, offering her a fake smile. “What were you saying?”
She sighed, looking at me empathetically.
“I said… now that we’re sure of…,” she gestured towards my belly, clearly scared to say the word ‘pregnancy.’
“Yes?”
“Are you going to keep it or are you going to look into the other option that the Doctor suggested?”
Abortion.
Never in my life did I think that was ever going to be an option I ever faced in life.
“I don’t know, Ciara, and quite frankly, I cannot wrap my head around having this conversation right now. So, can we please just beg out of this hospital parking lot? We’ve been here long enough, and it’s starting to make my skin crawl,” I said, then turned away from her and looked out the window.
She let out a deep sigh.
I knew I was being mean to her, but I just couldn’t stop thinking about anything other than my current predicament at that time.
“Alright.”
She immediately pulled out of the parking lot, and we didn’t utter a word to each other until she dropped me off at home.
- Writer
