Chapter 28 - Valentina
1678 Words
Valentina
Palermo, Sicily 2020 – summer
I wake up in an unfamiliar room with a dry mouth, completely disoriented. It takes me a few seconds to realize that the cream-colored ceiling and the matching drapes don’t belong to my bedroom in Russia.
Fragments of my dream come back to me as soon as I completely wake up. I try to shake them off, bury them somewhere deep in my brain where I'll never find them again. It’s a new day, but the view I have of the trees doesn’t look like rainy Russia.
Then I remember that I’m in Sicily, sleeping in a guest room in Matteo’s house. I sit up and groan, rubbing my eyes and running my hands through my hair. I can still taste the wine from last night.
My mom wasn’t too happy about me being in Italy during the Covid, but getting out of the house after two months feels good . My dad didn’t even read the messages I sent in the group yesterday.
Raisa: you’re in Palermo????
“Shiiiit.” I say under my breath as I read the message she sent last night. While I was on the balcony. Smoking with her crush. I didn’t even think of telling her about it. How does she even know?
I check ** as I get out of bed and pull the curtains to the side so I can open the window. The sun blinds me from the left but I love it, and for a moment I forget about Raisa.
Raisa: you’re leaving me on read??
I groan and set the phone down. I need to brush my teeth and wash my face first before I can deal with unnecessary drama.
There’s a voice message from Raisa waiting in my notifications bar, so I change into a pair of black shorts and a white shirt. I play her voice memo, finally, as I try to put my hair up in a ponytail. No one warned me it would be 27 degrees in Italy, yet here we are.
“I saw on Isabella’s story that you’re in Palermo, she posted you and Matteo in the fountain…anyway, how come you’re there? I would’ve loved to come with. When are you coming back? Are you back already? Kisses!”
I resist the urge to roll my eyes at myself in the mirror. Coffee, I need coffee. And a cigarette.
I mentally prepare myself to send a voice message to Raisa explaining everything (I don’t know why I feel like I owe her an explanation – I don’t, I haven’t done anything wrong), as well as ask Matteo for coffee.
The worst thing about being at someone’s house is feeling like a toddler who needs to ask every time they want something. I’m also not sure what my boundaries with Matteo are now, because we’ve gotten along better than expected. My expectations were the usual chit chats I had with him every time we saw each other, nothing out of the ordinary.
But it felt…comfortable. It was weird, exactly because I expected it to be and it wasn’t. I genuinely enjoyed myself in what feels like forever since Covid started, and he even got two new tattoos. I haven’t gotten a new tattoo in ages.
“Soooo Matteo and I take the same Business Psychology course and he asked me to help him during the exam.” I open the door. “Yes…so he flew me out and I helped him pass, and then I stayed over because it’s Vinnie’s birthday today.”
I let go of the button and think about what else to say. I don’t know if Vinnie or Pia want to invite her, but there’s no point in lying. I press the corner of the screen again.
“It’s a yacht party in Ibiza today at eight or nine, I don’t know for sure. They invited me because I was here, and I said yes. I don’t even have my own clothes, I had to borrow Aurora’s. Oh, and they showed me around Palermo yesterday, which is why we were in that fountain.” I chuckle and knock on Matteo’s door before ending the voice message.
I wait a few minutes then knock again. I hear some groaning from inside so I take it as him being awake. I also need coffee more than I need him to like me right now.
“Matteo?” I ask, looking over to his bed. I can only see a mop of brown hair between the pillows and blankets, and hear him mumble something in Italian under his breath.
“Yes? What.”
He turns his head and I can see his eyes are still closed.
“I want some coffee, but I don’t really know my way around here.”
“There’s a cook downstairs, ask him.”
“But I’m-okay, I’m not embarrassed but I feel bad-“
He makes a dramatic show of huffing and puffing and turning his back to me. I look at the tattoo on the back of his shoulder. Not a morning person then.
“Make it the new thing you try today then.” He sarcastically says and I just stare at his back for a second before I flip him off with both hands. I hear him say something in Italian, so I just turn around and close the door behind me.
I see that Raisa has already replied to my voice message as I walk down the stairs. It doesn’t take me long to find the kitchen and thankfully, it’s empty. There’s a coffee machine on one of the counters with the pods next to it.
“Eaasy.” I tell myself, forgetting about my phone.
The coffee is done two minutes later, and I press the ice button on the fridge to make it instantly drinkable. I go back upstairs, happy that I am surrounded by 0 people.
I need a cigarette.
Shit, but I don’t want to smoke out the window in someone else’s house like a lunatic. Matteo will just have to deal
I knock on the door again, but don’t wait for a response this time before I slowly tip toe in. He’s still sleeping, so I try to go over to the balcony without making a sound. My slippers don’t cooperate, but I manage to open the doors and walk outside with just one hand and without waking him up.
It takes me a minute to take in the view. Every time I come to Italy for the summer after having spent time either in Moscow or New York, I feel like I'm a different person. Or maybe more myself. It's the weather, for sure. I don't even like the weather in those cities 80% of the time.
“I can only wear 20% of my wardrobe during the weather I get 80% of the time.” I say to myself, then start looking for my lighter. I realize it’s already on the table from yesterday.
“Math in the morning? My head hurts.”
I look to my right, horrified. Matteo is standing in the door with the blanket under his armpits, hair disheveled and unimpressed about my presence. He looks well rested and almost like a baby. What changed?
The bags under his eyes are gone.
He’s got the most resting b***h face I’ve ever seen, lol
“Is that coffee?” he asks, sitting down across from me at the table.
“Yes, but it-s” I watch him take the coffee to his lips and take two large gulps “-mine.”
He takes a cigarette from my pack and lights it up, then leans back facing the water. I get a flashback from last night in the fountain, when I was looking at his face from this angle.
I remember looking at him the moment he relaxed for like, five seconds. The way he looked up at the sky, how his eyes reflected the light of the moon and sparkled for a second.
I also remember the moment he realized the police were there and came back down to reality. He looked like the saddest boy in the happiest place on Earth, and my heart broke for him, for whatever reason.
As I watch him shamelessly drink my coffee and smoke my cigarettes without a care in the world, I tell myself that I cannot feel sorry for this man. Nor can I allow myself to even consider him cute.
I feel like it’s my mother talking, but after last night, he’s come dangerously close to me considering him an interesting man. Boy. Whatever. I can’t even entertain the idea of him being subjectively good looking. I don’t even think about it – my instinct just knows.
My train of thought takes me to Raisa, who I still haven’t replied to. I don’t even remember what we were talking about.
Raisa: hold on I’m going to text Ariana
Raisa: I want to come
Raisa: can you ask Matteo?
Raisa: wait, don’t ask him
Right, Vinnie’s birthday. I feel weird about inviting a friend of mine to Vinnie’s private birthday party in Ibiza.
Raisa: I talked to Ariana
Raisa: I’m flying out in an hour, see you there!!
“¡Se deve autoinvitarsi, dille almeno di portare Aleksi!”
For a moment I think Matteo’s talking to me, but then I see him holding the phone up to his mouth to send voice memos. All I understood was autoinvite and Aleksi, which tells me everything I need to know.
“Who are you talking to?” I ask.
“Vinnie. Your friend is coming too.”
I squint at him. “’My friend’ is your friend too.”
Matteo pretends not to hear me as he lights another cigarette.
“And don’t act like it’s such a drag that she’s coming. You know exactly why you want Alex there.”
He rolls his eyes. “Did I say anything? You’re the one getting defensive.”
- Writer
