And yet, the persistence of those participants in the marriage mart surrounded us at every turn. Tilly and Lucia would not let me shut myself completely away in the cabin, and my name dictated that I did not embarrass or upset Aunt Merry with tales getting back to New York of any untoward breach of manners on my part. Fending off these overtures exhausted and irritated and saddened me. So much waste.
Lucia made occasional oblique remarks about my absences from New York. On one occasion, we were sitting in deckchairs on the promenade deck watching some other passengers playing deck games and shuffleboard—Lucia had dragged me out because I “needed to bask in sunshine and sea spray”—while I tried to hide behind dark glasses and scarves and a wide-brimmed hat. Lucia was flicking through the p
