YOU ARE MY LIGHT

CHAPTER 14 : BREAKING THE WALLS

The only sound in the office was the ragged catch of my breath and the distant hum of the hospital. I stayed pressed against Mr. Vincent’s back for a moment longer than I should have, my forehead resting against the sturdy fabric of his coat. It was warm — the only warmth I had felt since my father’s gurney rolled into the ER. Slowly, I pulled away, wiping my eyes with the back of my hand. A sudden, sharp wave of embarrassment hit me. I was a professional nurse — yet I had just soaked the CEO’s shoulder with my tears.

“I… I’m sorry, sir,” I whispered, my voice small and cracked. Mr. Vincent didn’t turn immediately. He gave me a few seconds to gather my dignity — a small mercy that made my heart ache. When he finally turned, his “Glacier CEO” mask was gone. His eyes were filled with a soft, intense concern that made me want to hide… and run toward him at the same time.

“Don’t apologize for being human, Juliet,” he said quietly. He reached into his pocket and handed me a clean, folded handkerchief.

“Thank you,” I said, taking it and wiping my face. “Thank you, Mr. Vincent. I have to go and buy things for my father.” I turned to leave, but suddenly he grabbed my hand gently.

“Can I go with you?” he asked, concern written all over his face. I paused. I really needed that right now. I looked at him and nodded. He slipped off his coat and followed me, walking beside me as if he understood I needed company. We walked in silence to a nearby convenience store. When he tried to pay, I stopped him. He didn’t argue. We walked back slowly. My eyes stayed on our shadows stretching across the ground. Still in silence. He cleared his throat to break it. “Are you feeling better now, Juliet?” I managed a small nod.

“I’m sorry for the inconvenience my father caused at the hospital today.”

“It’s okay, Juliet. How is your mum doing?”

“She’s pretending to be fine,” I said quietly. For the first time in my life… I really wanted to open up to someone. “She has always been like that... pretending she’s fine.”

“I can see you learned that from her,” he said with a small smile. I looked at him and smiled too. I felt a little better. “But you don’t have to pretend like that in front of me, Juliet,” he said calmly and stopped walking. I noticed his shadow wasn’t moving. I turned back.

“Juliet…” he called softly. “If you want someone to talk to, I’m right here. You shouldn’t hold it in. Talking can make you feel better.” It was the first time I had ever heard someone say that to me. My heart tightened. I smiled faintly and continued walking, staring at our shadows again. My heart really wanted to open up to him…

“We pretend so we won’t make the other person worried,” I said slowly. “We’ve grown used to living like that.” I swallowed. “My mum has always been like that around me because of my… father.” The word felt heavy. “My father drinks... he drinks a lot... You saw him.” I stopped walking. He stopped too. “I think you should sit down,” he said gently, pointing to a bench. I sat. “You didn’t buy water. Let me get some.”

He ran off, quick and purposeful, like he always did. A few minutes later he came back and opened the water for me. I took a small sip. His expression tightened with worry. I took a deep breath. “My father has been like that since I started understanding what was happening around me. My mum hasn’t experienced real happiness for a long time. She has a husband… but it feels like she doesn’t. I have a father… but it feels like I don’t.” My voice shook slightly. “But she never stopped worrying about him.” He looked at me carefully. “And that’s what makes you so cautious of your environment and the people around you?” he said calmly, taking the bottle from my hand and covering it. I looked at him. “It’s hard for me to trust people or men around because of that. That was the wall my heart built when I was a child. If my own father could hurt his wife and daughter like that… what about someone not related to me?” He squatted in front of me. I felt embarrassed seeing the tears forming again and lowered my head.

“Juliet,” he said gently, “you may have gone through a lot, but you shouldn’t blame yourself. It’s not your fault. It’s not your mum’s fault. Your father simply didn’t value what he had.” He held my gaze. “You don’t have to punish yourself because of someone else’s mistake. Not all men are the same. There is a man somewhere who will love you, value you, respect you more than you think.”

“But my heart still doesn’t believe that,” I whispered. “How can you be loved when you can’t love fully?”

“Juliet… it’s okay. Even if you can’t open your heart now, a man who truly loves you won’t force you. He won’t tear your walls down by force. He will bring them down gently... without you even noticing. And one day, you’ll find yourself loving again.” I looked at him. He wasn’t Mr. CEO. He wasn’t the best surgeon. He was just a man. And maybe… the kind of man he was describing. “Juliet, don’t force yourself into anything that won’t make you happy. You deserve happiness.” I felt like hugging him. Instead, I laughed softly.

“This is my first time crying in front of someone and opening up like this.” He smiled.

"I'm glad I could be the first man you opened up to. And that's how a man different from your father will gradually bring down the walls."

My heart skipped. I smiled and breathed out "But my mum..." I said, the smile fading. "I really want to break the walls inside her too."

"You can help her do that," he said, standing before sitting beside me, so close that our shoulders touched. "You are the only light, hope, and freedom she has. Have you thought about her leaving him?" he asked

"She doesn't want to. I think she still loves him."

"I think the reason your mum is enduring might not be because she still loves him, it might be because of you," he said. "She doesn't want to break you up or make you feel like something is missing."

"But why would she suffer because of me?" Tears tried to come out again. "I thought she stayed because she loved him."

"She loves him because she loves you. If she didn't, she would have left a while ago." He looked at me carefully.

"Someone who loves you will do anything for you without thinking twice." I looked back — and realized how close we were. My breath caught. I quickly looked away. "Why don't you try to talk to her and open up to each other?" I nodded. He patted my head, stood up and held out his hand as if to help me stand. "Let's go back." I took his hand to stand up and slowly let go of it.

We walked back to the hospital, and I went to find my mother. She wasn't in her room, but a nurse told me she was at Balcony 23. I stepped into the elevator alone. As the doors closed, I realized something. For the first time in my life, I didn’t feel completely alone with my pain. And that scared me… almost as much as it comforted me. The elevator doors opened with a soft sound. Balcony 23 was quiet. The night air was cool, brushing gently against my skin as I stepped out. The city lights shimmered below like distant stars. And there she was. My mum stood near the railing, her back to me, her hands resting on the cold metal. For a moment, I just watched her. She looked smaller than I remembered.

“Mum,” I called softly.

She turned immediately. “You’re here,” she said, forcing a smile. “Are you back?”

I walked closer and nodded. “I was looking for you.”

“I just needed some air,” she replied. I moved beside her and rested my hands on the railing too.

“It’s beautiful,” I said, looking at the lights below.

“Yes,” she answered. “It is.

Then her voice softened. "I’m sorry about the scene your father created at the hospital today,” she said.

“It’s okay,” I replied.

“I hope it won’t affect your work,” she added, sounding worried.

“No, mum.” “How are you feeling?” I asked, glancing at her bandage.

“I’m fine. My daughter treated me,” she said with a small smile.

“Mum…” My voice came out smaller than I expected. “Are you happy?” She froze — not dramatically, but enough. “Of course I am,” she said a little too quickly.

“I’m happy to have a daughter like you,” she added, smiling.

I looked at her. “With him?”

Her fingers tightened around the railing. “Juliet… as long as you are happy, I am also happy.”

“But mum, I’m not happy seeing you like this,” I said.

“What’s wrong?” she asked, taking my hands. “Mum, I don’t like the way you are suffering because of me. We are not honest with each other. We pretend to laugh. We pretend to be happy. That’s not how a mother and daughter should live. Please… can you be honest with me?” I held her hands tightly.

She exhaled. “Okay… I will be honest. I’m tired. I’m tired of pretending in front of my own child. I’m tired of holding on.”

“But mum, why are you still holding on if you are tired? Because of me?” I asked.

She squeezed my hands. “I do this because I don’t want you to feel incomplete. I didn’t want you to grow without a father. I wanted you to have both a mother and a father. I never wanted to see you suffer.”

“But mum, I’m not a little child anymore. I can take care of myself," I said through my tears. "You don’t have to suffer because of me.”

“You are still a little child to me,” she said softly. “Mum…” I held her hands. “You deserve to be happy. Don’t hold back your happiness because of me. I don’t want to be a daughter who steals joy from her mother.” Tears rolled down my cheeks.

“Don’t say that, Juliet,” she whispered, cleaning my tears. “You are my happiness. Don’t ever think you deprive me of anything. If that were true, I would have left long ago. But where would I go when my happiness is here?”

“Mum…” I called. “What about trying… to leave now? I am grown up. You don’t have to suffer because of me anymore. I can take care of myself.... I am also tired… I am tired of seeing you like this.”

“It’s okay,” she said, hugging me. We cried together. But this time, it felt honest. After a while, she pulled back slowly and wiped her tears. “It’s time to talk about you,” she said, holding my hand, and smiled. A real smile — I could feel it.

“Me?” I asked, wiping my own tears. “What do you want to talk about? "My work?....my work is going great. I have been assigned to one of the best doctors as an assistant nurse. You should have noticed him, mum — the handsome tall one.” A big, silly smile spread across my face without permission.

“That’s what I wanted to ask,” she said. “You love Mr. Vincent, right? I can see it in your eyes. You are in love. Someone has finally broken the walls around my daughter’s heart.” she teased.

“Mum!” I said, embarrassed, swinging our hands like a teenager in love. I felt embarrassed — but happy.

“I’m really happy for you, Juliet.” “But I still don’t know what this feeling is,” I admitted.

"It's the feeling of love... you're in love,” she said. “I felt the same way when I fell for your father. I used to smile every time I talked about him.”

“But I am scared," I whispered. "of how it will end. I don’t know if he feels the same way.”

“You don’t have to be afraid,” she replied. “You have to try first,” she said firmly. “Try first. If it fails, you can learn. Don’t be afraid to face your fears. If you love him, fight for him. And from what I see… he cares for you deeply.” “Mum…” I squeezed her hand. “How do you know?” I asked curiously.

“Can’t you see it in his eyes?” she said softly. “His eyes show that he cares deeply for you.” Then she leaned closer and whispered: “I saw you crying on his back.” My cheeks burned. “I went to look for you,” she continued, “but I couldn’t find you. A nurse told me you went to Mr. Vincent’s office to report about going out. I went there… and I saw everything.”

“Mum, it’s not what you think,” I protested.

"Really?" she teased. We laughed. It had been so long since I laughed like that with her. “But you must be careful,” she added. “He will soon be a CEO and he's the best surgeon around here. A world far from ours. You are a nurse. People may gossip. They may say ugly things. I am not saying you are less, my daughter. You are amazing. But people do not always see things with kindness. If you love him — go. If he can protect and respect you — go. Just be careful.” I nodded. She was right. A CEO and a nurse. A broken family and a powerful hospital world. Two different worlds.

"I will leave everything to fate," I whispered.

“Leave it to fate,” she repeated, hugging me. “It’s been a long time since I felt this kind of happiness,” she whispered. I hugged her tightly. “Mum, I will find a good lawyer for you.” She nodded.

“I will speak with your father about it.” I nodded too. She went downstairs. I stayed for a moment, breathing in the cool night air, looking at the city lights. Then Mr. Vincent came to my mind. I needed to tell him the news. He helped us. He deserved to know.

I entered the elevator and went to his office. He wasn’t there. “Maybe he is in surgery,” I told myself. I walked slowly. I really wanted to see him. Then I spotted him in the hallway.

“Mr. Vincent,” I called softly, trying not to disturb others. He turned. I ran towards him. “Careful,” he said, reaching a hand in case I tripped. “You really are excited,” he smiled.

“Yes,” I said, breathless. “My mum finally decided to leave."

His smile widened. "And I came to thank you. You helped us open up. You understood us. You saw what we couldn’t say. You are a person who really understands people's hearts.” I laughed softly.

“This is the first time I have seen you laugh like this,” he said.

“So... is it cute?” I blurted out. The words escaped before I could stop them. I covered my mouth, embarrassed. Then I heard a small laugh. I looked up. It was him. I lowered my head. “This is really embarrassing,” I murmured.

“You don’t have to be embarrassed," he said. “Yes — your laugh… it is cute.” We laughed together. Then silence. Just for a moment. We were just looking at each other. Lost in that quiet space. Then a voice broke it.

“Vincent.” The voice came from a distance. The sound of heels echoed down the hallway. I turned. A tall, elegant woman approached with an older man. Graceful. Powerful. Like someone born into wealth.

“Grandpa,” Mr. Vincent said respectfully. “Grandpa,” I repeated in my head. So this was the almighty Chairman I had never met. “What are you doing here?” he asked. They approached. I greeted the older man. He nodded.

“Dora came back,” the grandfather said. “She wants to help you, so I brought her here.” The elegant woman — Dora — stepped forward. She stopped in front of him.

“Long time no see Vincent,” she said, opening her arms for a hug. There was a small silence. I lifted my eyes for a second — then lowered them again. I could feel Mr. Vincent looking at me.

“It has been a long time, Dora,” he said. He offered his hand to shake instead. They shook hands. Her smile remained, but it looked slightly restrained — like she had expected something else. I stood quietly beside him. Then she shifted — subtly — positioning herself just slightly closer to him. Not enough for anyone to comment on, but enough for me to notice. I instinctively stepped back.

“Let’s go to my office and talk, Grandfather,” Mr. Vincent said.

“Okay. Show me the way. It’s been really long since I came here,” the grandfather replied. I raised my face. Mr. Vincent looked at me and nodded. I nodded back. They started walking toward his office. Halfway, Dora turned and looked at me from head to toe. Slowly. Carefully. I stood watching their backs, a world that looked complete and powerful without me. A powerful grandfather. An elegant woman. A future CEO. My happiness vanished almost immediately. Something didn’t feel right inside my chest. Not anger. Not jealousy exactly. Just… fear. Fear that maybe our worlds were too different. Fear that nothing would be as simple as it had felt just minutes ago. And as I stood there alone in the hallway, I realized something. Being happy is one thing. Keeping it might be the harder battle.