WIFE SERIES : Silent Scars [Tagalog]

Chapter 7

Ang puting kisame at amoy ng antiseptic ang bumungad sa akin pagkagising. That only means that I was in the Hospital.

I roamed my eyes and noticed that I was alone in the room. Biglang bumukas ang pinto at niluwa nito ang isang doctor kasama ang isang nurse.

I tried to sit up when they got on my side.

“How are you feeling?” tanong ng doctor habang nakangiti.

Pinakiramdaman ko ang aking sarili. Lately, I’ve been feeling exhausted kahit simpleng galaw lang. Kahit ngayon din. Pagod din ang aking pakiramdam.

“I think I am. But lately, I’ve been feeling exhausted. Maybe I was just stressed,” sabi ko sa doctor. She smiled again.

“It’s normal. You are actually two weeks pregnant. Congratulations.” It was like a bomb that exploded in front of me. “Your baby is actually healthy so no need to worry,” she added.

Nanlalaki ang aking mata habang nakatingin lang sa doctor na nakangiti sa akin.

I didn’t know what to feel. I was shocked. Biglang sumagi sa isip ko si Philip. f**k! I know he was the one who brought me here. I just hope that he didn’t know it yet.

“D-Doc. Nasaan ang kasama ko?” kinakabahan na tanong ko.

“He’s outside. May binili ata sa labas. Do you want me to call him?”

“No! I mean. You don’t have to. Did you already tell him about me being pregnant?” I was praying that she didn’t.

“No. I didn’t. I want you to know it first. Bakit? May problema ba?” tanong nito na may halong pag-aalala.

“Can you do me a favor, Doc? If he will ask about me, please tell him that I was just stressed.” Kita ko kung paano biglang naguluhan ang doctor sa sinabi ko.

“If that’s what you want. Walang problema,” she agreed without asking why.

Sakto namang bumukas ulit ang pinto at niluwa nito si Philip. I looked away. Hindi ko siya kayang tingnan ngayong alam ko nang buntis ako at si Nicholai ang ama. I couldn’t tell him now. I didn’t want to break him more.

Damn it! Why was this happening?

Pasimpling kong hinawakan ang aking tiyan. I wanted to cry. I know I was not ready pero andito na. I didn’t want my child to feel unwanted. Walang siyang kasalanan.

Naglakad papasok si Philip at tinanong agad ang doctor tungkol sa akin. I was silent. The doctor told him that I was just stressed and just needed to rest. Pwede na din akong umuwi.

“Love, are you really okay?” nag-aalalang tanong ni Philip.

“Yes, Love. I’m fine. I just need to rest. Gusto ko nang umuwi sa condo ko. Pwede mo ba akong ihatid?” I looked at him for a bit and then looked away.

“Of course. Let me settle everything first,” sabi nito sabay halik sa aking sentido bago lumabas.

Philip settled everything bago kami umalis ng hospital at hinatid sa condo ko. We were already in front of my condo unit when Philip talked.

“Would you like me to stay with tonight?”

“You don’t have too. I know may work ka pa bukas. I will just sleep and I will be fine tomorrow. I assure you.” I looked at him and I saw how he wanted to stay with me.

But I felt the opposite. Gusto kong mapag-isa. I had to think about what I needed to do after knowing that I was pregnant. Kailangan kong mag-isip kung ano ang dapat at mas makakabuti para sa anak ko.

I heard him sighed in defeat. “Fine. But please call me if something happens. I’ll tend to you anytime,” sabi nito habang hawak ang aking kamay.

“Okay, Love. Ingat ka pauwi.”

“Okay. I’m going now. I love you.” My heart suddenly constricted. It was like anytime, I was going to cry. I looked at Philip like I was memorizing his face.

I already concluded what would happen to us now that I was pregnant. At hindi ko alam kung kaya ko ba siyang bitawan at gawin kung ano ang tama.

I couldn’t bear to see him hurt because of me. Because I made a mistake na kailanman ay di ko na pwedeng maitama. Kasi may bunga na ito.

“I love you too,” I said to him and then kissed him. He was kinda taken aback. But he kissed me back in the same manner. Binuhos ko lahat ng nararamdaman ko kasi baka ito na ang huli.

He hugged me and kissed me for the last time before he left.

I went inside my condo and cried my heart out. Gusto kong sisihin ang nasa sinapupunan ko dahil nasasaktan ako. But I refrain myself. No! It was not the baby's fault. Baby was a blessing. Maybe there was a reason why He gave this little one on my tummy unexpectedly.

Pinahid ko ang aking luha at kinalma ang sarili. I decided to take a bath.

Medyo gumaan ng kaunti ang pakiramdam ko matapos maligo sa maligamgam na tubig. I changed into my silk nightdress and was about to blow dry my hair when my phone suddenly rang. Nilapag ko sa nightstand ang blow dryer at kinuha ang phone ko sa kama.

It was my mom.

I answered the call right away and my mother’s worried voice greeted me.

[Denima! Are you okay, anak? Tinawagan kami ni Philip kanina. We’re here in the hospital kaya lang umuwi na daw kayo. We’re late because of the traffic.]

“I’m okay, Ma. Stressed lang lately. The doctor said I just need to rest,” pikit-matang pagsisinungaling ko.

I heard my mother sigh in the other line. [Okay. Pinag-alala mo kami. Sige, ibababa ko na ang tawag para makapagpahinga ka na. We’re on our way home too. Love you.]

“Love you too, Ma. Ingat kayo pag-uwi,” sabi ko bago niya binaba ang tawag.

Biglang bumigat ulit ang pakiramdam ko dahil sa kasinungalingan na sinabi ko.

I was startled when the doorbell suddenly rang.

My forehead creased. It was already late. Maybe it was Philip. Baka may nakalimutan ito kaya bumalik.

I hurriedly combed my hair and got out of my room at naglakad papunta sa pinto. Without looking who was outside, I immediately opened the door with the thought that it was just Philip.

Ang galit na mukha ni Nicholai ang tumambad sa akin pagkabukas ko pa lamang ng pinto. My eyes widened and was about to close the door when he grabbed my hand and pulled me inside my condo before slamming the door shut. Sinandal niya ako sa nakasarang pinto at galit nakatingin sa akin.

“If you think that you can escape from me, think twice, Denima.”