My Unmarried Pregnant Secretary

5.3

So hot.

I notice that he leans down and places a long kiss where my cheek and ear almost meet, smoothing my hair behind it. I want to turn my head so our lips are attacking but I can't. It'll change our relationship. I like this stage now. It's entertaining. I can probably have some fun with it if I play my cards right. . . .

"I'll finish up later." Before I knew it. I'm alone.

Wait a minute.

I'm alone. Oh my goodness, I know this is not the time to be thinking about all of the scary characters I've seen in movies, but I'm doing it anyway.

Hey, Varnika. Remember how creepy Freddy was when they showed his face? Or when Jason took off his mask? Oh! What about when you watched that Disney movie, "Don't Look Under The Bed"? That gave you nightmares, right?

I hear a crack come from next to me. Oh my, I'm going to be manhandled in this forsaken staircase.

Out steps no other beast than Decana "himself". Was the she-he spying on me and my moment?!

"Well, I hope you enjoyed going against my terms. Because I know I specifically said to stay away." She comes up closer to me breathing her killer whale breath. "And I hope you have fun climbing your way down the social ladder and going beyond Herrick, because that's exactly where I'll put you."

She leaves her mouth partially open allowing me to get a glance at her gap. Gaps aren't ugly to me. But on her they're just terrible. And that purple streak in her hair is losing color. She needs to stop.

"Okay, I'm glad you're 'venting' and all, but your breath is horrendous and I have to go. Goodbye." I gently nudge her out of my way no matter how much I want to body-slam her face to the floor.

Control your anger, Varnika. Think happy thoughts that would make you titter. Like the time Decana fell down the stairs.

Probably the best moment of my life right there.

**::**::**::**::**::**

So in the first period, I had to pretend I was a caveman and could only speak through body gestures if asked a question. Second period I had to fall on the floor from my desk and not respond for thirty seconds. Nearly gave Ms. Lame a heart attack and made her grab her inhaler. Akshay was taken out of all of his classes today so none of him. Thank goodness.

I'm tired of embarrassing myself. Jannat is going to be found inside of a landfill tonight.

"Varnika!" Who's calling my name now?! I'm wearing a freakin' pirate hat, a Thing 2 T-shirt and ugly glasses. What does she want?

I turn around in the hall to see Rohan. "Oh, hey Rohan." Finally, my normal friend. "Whatcha need?"

"Nothing." She clamps her mouth closed to the point where she has no lips. Suspicious. . .

"I just realized it's your day of the game and, well, I stayed up all day to think of something for you!" Full blown, eye blinding, miracle working smile. Rohan isn't the best thinker, so it's probably something silly like grabbing some crud out of the garbage can.

"Oh, sure."

"Okay." She claps her hands together showing enthusiasm. Giddy much? "I thought of this when Louis passed me last period. You, Varnika, have to sit with the Limbers and Louis at lunch today!" She gives me a playful nudge when I want to give her a fist up her butt. The Limbers?! And Louis? This is the day the world crumbles to pieces.

I pull on a joking smile. "Ha! You're funny, Rohan. Nice joke. Really good. You got me there." She shows no change of emotions. She's not even kidding is she?

"I don't make jokes, Varnika. You know that. Now, go sit with them and have fun!" Rohan throws me a thumbs up and a cheesy smile, then walks around me towards the cafeteria. I start to think of what this lunch period will be like.

Lunch. Louis. Limbs. Breath. Fumes. Inhaler. Regurgitation. Twitching.

Oh my goodness, I can't do this. I'll be intoxicated within minutes! Maybe I should call 911 ahead of time. . .

I start to go into the cafeteria, readjusting my purse on my shoulder trying to look like a normal teenager.

Trying.

I trip twice in less than five seconds over leftover food from the first lunch period. Dumb slobs making me look like I belong with The Limbers.

Glancing around at the tables I actually notice the cliques.

Goths, Punks, Jocks, Rohan and her freaks destroying the jock section, Normals, and the Stoners. Ugh, those Limbers need a cooler place to sit. They're next to the janitor's closet and the giant dumpster.

I'm going to smell worse than Louis when I'm done sitting over there.

**::**::**::**::**::**

Staring and stinking. That's all they know how to do. Ever since I started to eat my pizza, it's been constant, stare, stare, glare, stink, stink, stare.

"Are you all just going to stare at me the whole time I'm sitting here?" They don't even waver their glares. Each of them are looking at different parts of me and Louis probably can't even see me over the stink-steam of death that emerges from his pores.

"Did you know that your left upper arm is a lighter shade of a tan complexion than the rest of your arm?" Stop you little blonde, one-toothed watcher. I don't need you to find out about my mark.

"Yes, I know that. Thank y--"

"Why?" Oh my gosh your voice is just like in the movies. The high pitched, nerdy sense to it.

I push my empty tray away from me. "I don't find it any of your concern s--"

"Why do your calves not touch when you put them together?" Forget formal! These weirdos are getting on my nerves!

"Listen, Limbers! Quit asking stupid questions because I'm just gonna give you a stupid answer!" I let out a sigh of pure frustration, slamming my hands on the table and instantly regretted it when I smelled Herrick and went into a coughing show.

"Your arms flex when you cough." Ugh! It's like they want me to thread my fingers around their throat. Permanently. In fact, I won't even have to do that. I'll just go Darth Vader again.

I feel a ripple from my pocket. Am I being tazed? Oh, no it's my phone.

'Hey you over there??? O_o'

Agastya noticed me? Crap, crap, crap, crap. I just bumped down 5,000 levels in a social status that I'm not supposed to care about but only noticed because of Decana's remark.

'uh no reason 8| ... i won't be here tomorrow :)'

Just avoid questions. Questions get you jumped in the Chuck E. Cheese's alley.

'well.... Can I ask you a question....? '

A question? Oh, no. He's going to chop off my thumbs isn't he?

sure..... :)'

If he asks me about that cheese. . . I don't know what I'll say. I avoided it last time I was asked but who knows. Maybe he's suddenly curious about why the fuss was coming out of his locker, you know?

``Will you be my hurling friend??... :))'

What the? This text came so freakin' fast, I barely had time to take a whiff of the new wave of funkification from the table.

'A WHAT?! D:'

I am not bulimic! Is he suggesting that I eat and then throw it back up? What gave him that idea? I'm not that skinny!

As I stuff my phone back into my pocket, I cover up my eyes with both hands. I wonder why when we see nothing, we see black. My eyes open so I stare at the darkness in front of me as I eavesdrop on the Limbers.

"Don't you think Robin should've gone solo from Batman a long time ago? I think Batman was holding Robin back." Low voice, stuttering.

"Yeah. I think DC Comics and Marvel need to make some more heroes. The old ways are getting pretty lame now." High voice, hitting puberty.

"Well, there is that chick, Thalia now." High-raspy voice--oh no. Not this conversation!

"Yeah! She's so attractive! I saw a higher quality video on YouTube of her. I wonder if she'll be my prom date this year." Oh, in heck I won't! I hear a smack probably from someone hitting the speaker.

"She probably has a boyfriend, stupid. But I've been calculating the dates of her appearances and it's only when people are in danger. So I have my technical Spyware hooked up on my computer and I'm going to put myself in a dangerous situation so she'll come and save me. Then, when she touches me, I'll hook the tracker onto her and use my special database to find her at all times."

Louis! You creep! I'm not going to touch you! Or smell you! Although it'll probably just seep through the measures of my nose walls and burn my eyes out anyways.

"That's genius! And I've been studying her to find out her abilities and I'll report it to Channel 17 this week when I finish my elaborations. So far I've got telekinesis, invulnerability, superhuman agility, superhuman strength, and precognition." Dang. I don't even know what half of that stuff is. Dictionary.com, I'll need your assistance later.

All of a sudden, I feel stiff; unmovable. Oh. No. Not now! I'm in public! I can clearly see my hands light up from the blackness as if a flashlight were shining bright and fully charged. My eyes. . . they actually glow. . . I thought it was just an illusion!

And I'm out.

A familiar nerdy face is walking down the freshman hallway with a book when the guy from Decana's party lurks behind him and starts to shove him against the wall and jab him in the gut. Great, s****l assault boy is a bully too. Not cool. He starts to yell profanities at him, demanding his biology homework. Really? Stupid boy. The biology homework for you isn't even due until next week and it's only one page. Peton told me.

The nerd tries to plead with him, explaining, but it's not working for Nose Boy. Then, it all goes black and reads, 'Wednesday, 11:15'

I remove my hands to find the table staring at me again.

"Your hands are weird." And they're about to be blowing sucker punches if you don't quit talking to me about my body parts.

My phone clock says it's 11:13. What the heck? I have two minutes? Jumping up from my seat, the pirate hat falls to the floor and I start to weave around the obstacle of students trying to reach the doors. Ooh, I feel like Mario when he's going to the castle. All adventure-like. Except the turtles are students who think Chicago is a state.

My phone buzzes and I pull it out like a fashion model. The slight wind adds an effect to my chocolate hair.

'no! I mean, do you want to go putty with me!' Ew! I don't want to go potty with him!

"Wait, Varnika!" Agastya's voice yells for me as I try to exit.

"I really can't talk right now!" My voice earns a few derp faces to look at our screaming competition. Well if you guys weren't so loud, I wouldn't have to scream from the bottom of my foot!

I continue to reach the doors, quickening my pace when I hear Agastya start to let out grunts of frustration.

"Ugh! I mean, Varnika! Will you be my girlfriend?!"

You know that odd silence that happens randomly in a room? Well, it happened exactly when he started to talk.

And it stays that way. I stop my awkward half-walk-half-run, and slowly turn around. He did not. Just ask that.

What am I freakin' gonna do? I like him, yes. But I don't want my mom to flip out. I want to say 'Will I be your girlfriend? Well, it's about time because my hormones have been eating me inside out since Friday!', but I feel like it's rushed. I've never developed these Aarav feelings so freakishly fast before and I think it's best if I say no. It'll save me from all the attention.

Wait. If I say no, then I'll be chased down after school by all the Agastya-fanatics and they'll go all thug-nasty on me! Then I'll have to put Thalia on them! And if I put Thalia on them, I'll be found out! And if I'm found out, that means I can't get a cool costume from my mom! And without the cool costume, I'll be a loser and not go to college and end up as a woman who lives under a bridge.

I guess that means there's only one right answer in this situation.

Only now do I notice that everyone in the blasted cafeteria is staring as Agastya makes his way over to me with a hand behind his back, smiling that Emmy Award smile and his dark mesmerizing hair glistening.

Oh, wow. I get a heavy crush on someone and start to think of all these big words.

"You haven't answered yet," He takes a pause stopping in front of me, towering over so much I have to literally look up. Tall people. Always being. . . tall. "Little Lady." Oh, Agastya! You remember the name you called me!

I'm pretty sure I have a shocked, half-crying face on. I just know it.

His hand reaches from behind him and it's a plump, caramel, fluffy teddy bear holding an eye-popping, crimson, red Varnika. A strict 'Aww', overflows from the cafeteria and I notice some camera phones. He's not a celebrity guy. Calm down.

Oh.

My.

Whinney.

I can't help the smile that makes its way onto my face within milliseconds exposing my oh-so-'adorable'-looking dimples.

He places the teddy bear in my hand and as soon as his hands release it, I jump up reaching my arms around his neck in a huge I'm-A-Freakin'-Momma-Bear hug. Inhale the Agastya-ess smell, exhale the Ry--

Before my thought finishes I'm taken under custody into a coughing mayhem. I'm let down by him and he's smirking at me.

"Did I spray the bear too much?" It's the teddy bear causing this. He sprayed the teddy bear with his cologne! He's one over-achiever.

"No, it's perfect." Gaze into those eyes, Varnika. Gaze into them! That'a girl.

"So, about my question," He says, grabbing my hands. Oh, what the heck, why not. If I say no, I'll turn into one of those obsessed crushes. And that's just lethal in my case.

"Yes."

Can't people mind their own dang business? I'm just a tense girl with superpowers. Calm yourself down, fools.

"It's her!"

"You're Thalia?"

"Can you take a photo with my son?"

These people are asking way too many questions. I have an already bombed half-date to attend to. "Um, hi. Yeah I'm the. . . Thalia? I really don't have answers to your questions right now. I'm just a teenager and I'm still in school. . . so. . ." An uneasy silence falls over the crowd. Their eyes just stare at me in speechlessness. This isn't a circus. You don't see me running around like a nutcase juggling newborn babies, do you?

A little boy, maybe seven, approaches me at my leg. "Ma'am? Can you sign my action figure?" He raises up a palm sized toy of superman and a black sharpie. Apparently, nobody cares that a little seven year old boy is walking around with a permanent marker in his hand with eternal-rest-worthy parts. I know I'm not the only one that sees this right?

I take the marker from his hand and kneel down to his level. "Sure. What's your name, kid?" Bet it's something girly like Amanda.

"Mehuls Bond." Oh, my what kind of ignorant, selfish, stupid thinking parents named you that? No offense if your name is Mehuls Bond, though. The figure is placed into my palm and I start to sign an "R" and quickly write over it with a "T". That was pretty close wasn't it? Crap, it's ruined. I might as well have written the alphabet, overlapping with my left hand.

"Thank you! Thank you so much! You and Superman should date!" Mehuls comes forward and envelopes me into a soft, warming hug.

Hugs. Sounds familiar. It's almost like a faint smell you can't quite define with me. Affection is something I'm not really used to, which is why I unconditionally freak out when Agastya almost kisses me, touches me, or even looks at me. The old grunge of a father I had never cared about people's feelings and how much they could hurt. You'd think that when you tell a girl under the age of ten that she's a foul piece of nothingness, it'd hurt her. My dad's logic said otherwise.

He's dead to me now. Dead to me. I don't ever want to see him again. A tear escapes my eye and I wrap my arms around the little boy sinking my head into his neck.

"Um, mom? Get her offa me. I don't know what she's doing." Oh, snap. I didn't think this through. I guess it's kind of eerie if your "hero" starts crying on your shoulder because you asked for an autograph. You better make up some quick save before that boy burns his action figure 'til it's milk.

"I'm sorry, Mehuls." The tears are quickly wiped from me and I look him in the eyes. "I'm just crying because I've always found Superman attractive but I have a boyfriend now." Mehuls' eyes are the size of Pluto--which is still a planet to me--and he looks totally freaked out of his loving, innocent mind.

He starts to grab his mom's hand and walk away with her. "I just wanted an autograph, mom." I hear him mumble quietly to her. Well my fan-club just dropped to negative one people. Yay.

I guess I should stand up or something and find Agastya without actually finding Agastya because if I find Agastya then he won't know it's me and--oh crap! Agastya! He doesn't know where I am! My eyes search the whole area, sLesanieming over the dust tree and find him sitting in the pile of leaves playing with one of them with this distant, depressed look on his face.

He thinks I ditched him! This day is turning out so horrible. Every date I have with him somehow gets completely and utterly complicated.

"Thalia! We would like a few words with you! I understand you are a busy young lady but may we please ask some questions?" It'd be rude to leave them there wondering but Agastya looks like he's about to get up and walk off a building. Just when he was going to kiss me I took off and never made it back.

My white-gray eyes flicker from Agastya to the news crew. I'll just have to explain in a second to him. "Please no more than three." But if those three questions involve making a thesis statement, calculating the distance between a kilometer and a mile or restating the "I Have A Dream" speech, I'm out.

The man clasps his hands together and the camera man adjusts himself, cuing the anchor. "Yes folks, I'm Theo Leonardo with Virginia Beach News Networking and I'm here at the corner of Hillbillies Lily where the newest sighting of Thalia has occurred." He turns to face me. "Thalia, tell us about this remarkable tattoo on your arm?"

A big, fluffy, black sponge mic is shoved over my head. Almost forgot about my tattoo too. Heh, that sounds funny. "Um, I woke up one day, and it showed up after I was at Zo-uuumba classes." Oh my gosh get me out of this dreadful situation! I almost blew my cover twice today! First I'm just a failure altogether, and second almost blurted that I was over Jannat's house.

"Zumba?" Boy, don't you play with me! Believe the stupid lie so I can leave!

"Yep. Zumba. I was doing the moonwalk and skid across the floor on this arm and got a carpet burn." Nod your head and look believable. Nod the freakin', imbecile head, and look so freakin' believable.

"You moon-walked on the carpet?" Busted. How could I not have caught that?! Ugh!

"Um, yes. Thank you, that was three questions, bye!" I look around for Agastya and he's gone again. The port-potty is lying on its side and I rush over, open the door, grab my backpack, and run down the street. Flying is a little risky but I might not have a choice soon.

A small drop-off is approaching and all I'm saying is this is better work. If I go off this cliff and meet-- the wind gets knocked out of me as I hit the gravel-s***h-sandy ground. Half beach and half land just don't mix together. I sit up straight grabbing my ponytail when my backpack decides it's a nice time to drop onto my face from the sky. Splendidly joyous, yes?