My Unmarried Pregnant Secretary

6.0

"Oh my waffles, did I forget to stop that already? I'm so sorry, Varnika-Boo-Boo. You know I'm never serious about those things. You're un-grounded." It was literally that easy? Well, I'm in a great mood now! Forget all of the terrible things I just talked about.

'im sorry . My aunt was in the hospital on her death bed so I never really turned on my phone . She's good now but sorry if this text is really late! :/'

Death bed? Her aunt was dying? That's why Rohan was never on f*******: or answering her phone calls! Oh, dear--yes, I'm officially a terrible friend. Shoot me. No really, shoot me; it won't even hurt.

"Now go research this so we can ea--"

"Mom, I can't. I'm gonna go see Rohan." Sure, I get grounded, she forgets and finally un-grounds me and no less than a few seconds later, I'm leaving the house. But I have a good reason for this! Rohan needs a friend. Mom faces me with more powder and icing on her face. Or at least I think it's icing.

"Why? I just ungrounded you, honey. Rohan can wait 'til after dinner can't she?" Um, no?

"Her aunt was dying and I need to go see if she's okay, though." Immediately, my mom coughs so hard, I'm pretty positive that germs are chilling out on our floor. I'm not mopping that up.

"Rohan's aunt? Shirley? Oh, I loved Shirley! Go see Rohan and bring her some of these cookies I baked! I hear people love food when they're grieving over someone." She hands over a plate of deformed sugar cookies. Nobody with common sense will inhale these, mother.

"Uh, right. Eat. These. Okay. . ." Just keep your mouth shut, Varnika. It'll be fine. Dispose of the poison later when no screams can be heard and no human can be seen.

"Oh and Varnika, by the way," she says accusingly. "I haven't seen your car in a while. What happened to it? Do you still park it in the driveway?" Crap. I was doing so well too. Carpooling rides to school and other places everyday, occasionally, sneaking out one of my mom's cars. It's easy not to get caught, just refill the gas to where it was before when you're coming home.

I shift on my feet nervously staring out the kitchen window that shows the garage. "Uh, nope. I park it. . . elsewhere. Okay, bye! I'm gonna use the 'Stang!" Without a second thought, I grab the Mustang keys and launch into the garage and in the blue car. No need for her to find out about the Porsche now. I just got unpunished.

"Varnika? Come here! Omnomnom!" While I do love coming to Rohan's house, I hate it. Partially for the reason why I never get a hello, but a Super-Mother-Bear-Suffocating hug from her mother. As many times as I've tried before to make her mom and my mom talk, they've all failed. They basically have the same personality except Rohan's mom is pretty stupid. Loving! But still stupid. A few months ago before school started, I was going school supply shopping with Rohan and her mom and her mom asked if highlighter markers came in white so she could highlight in a brighter color.

I'll just leave it at that.

"Wow! It's been so long and your boobs have definitely gotten bigger--"

"Mom, I can take it from here, thanks." Rohan strolls in from around the corner trying up her ginger hair. "We're upstairs, Varnika." Whoa, whoa. We?

She must see my confused face because she continues. "Peton's here, too. She came like five minutes before you. . . or an hour. I forgot which one." Oh, Rohan, you've never been good with telling time. She starts trotting up the stairs and I follow her, preparing for the worst. Two people with the same secret and one person who has no clue about it in the same room for an indefinite length.

Things happen. And people die. Which means I serve life in prison.

Maybe we'll end up lying and make her believe this is all just a silly dream of hers and while she's really asleep, plot a way where she thinks a robber came in and used Chloroform on her. Tussle up the hair a bit, hide her valuables, leave a few bruises on her--

"Are you okay?" I snap out of it and realize we're in her yellow and black themed room with them both just staring at me. Peton gave me bug eyes as if I just blurted out, "Hey I'm Thalia and I just plotted a crime! Tell me!", and Rohan with a twitching eye. Someone needs to get that fixed. Walking around in public with an abnormally twitching eye gives people the wrong impression and possibly results in an apocalypse.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Totally fine." They both just stare at me in an awkward silence while I turn to Rohan who just took a seat on her bean bag chair. "So, Rohan, what was wrong with your aunt?" Peton takes a seat on the floor in front of her and I do too. Gosh, I love her carpet. I think it was imported from some country. . . that makes soft stuff. Maybe it's from Ukraine or Monaco. I don't know what I'm talking about anymore, forget me.

Rohan's face drops. "Oh, the doctor's aren't really sure. She was in her car or whatever and she told them that someone was following her in a van but she couldn't see the driver and then they crashed into her. That's the last thing she remembered. The cops went back to the scene of the accident and they claimed that they couldn't find a single trace of another vehicle being there. Nothing popped up in the security cameras, no leftover metal was there but her car was obviously hit by something. So she was in the hospital for several weeks because of her severe injuries."

Someone followed her aunt and the cameras never show a car following her? That's not even possible! And a piece of metal, even if it was the tiny size of my self esteem, would've been there. You can't just get away with something like that.

"So what're the cops gonna do about it?" Peton asks.

Rohan shrugs her shoulders. "Nothing. They can't find a piece of evidence to work with so they closed the case and insurance is paying for everything. I'm just glad she's okay."

"Yeah, I'm glad too, but isn't that a little weird to you guys? Or is it just me?" I'm pretty sure it's just me but you never--

"It's just you." Darn, you could've at least let me finish my thought. . . rude girls.

Rohan lounges back in the chair and directly faces me while fake playing with her fingernails. "So, Varnika. . ." Oh, crap, here we go. Time for my friends to gang up on me about things that I did and hoped they would never find out. Like when I fell on my face down the frozen foods aisle skidding my peas all over the floor. Talk about a bruise on the head and a great news bAllycast. This crooked world we live in. "How 'bout that Agastya?" So it's this topic.

I break eye contact and eyeball her bumblebee lamp as if it just became the most interesting thing in the world. "What about him?" She smirks.

"You know what. Have you kissed yet? You've been dating for nearly a month. Halloween has come and gone, Thalia has come and never revealed, my grandma is even still here! And she's freakin' old as dust! Heck, I bet she first discovered it! And here you are, Little O Varnika; just watching time pass her by without getting smoochy with Agastya yet."

Not knowing the right information, you could assume that I never kissed Agastya if you were anybody but me, him and his friends. I honestly can't be blamed this time. It's not my fault my glutton-inspired friends were all too focused on "school work" and "family problems" instead of my relationship life that shouldn't exist. I guess I'm halfway responsible, though. I haven't even kissed Agastya since the bonfire a while ago. Every time he'd try to kiss me at school or in private, I'd just get scared and somehow get out of it.

Maybe I'm just not the PDA type of girl, or maybe I am. I'm just hormonal and going through the last stages of teen crushing. It seems as if all this time I have been with Agastya and even before, my crush hasn't faltered. It's like we're not even dating and going through that "I wonder if he likes me back so let me make a fool out of myself" phase. Crushing hard on someone is stressful--especially when you're too chicken to kiss them a second time because the first time was too breathtaking.

I fidget with my scarf. "Right, kissing. . ." They both lean forward towards me with knowing faces. Well, I'm about to take a butcher's knife and stab the life out of that ego of yours because you're both wrong. "Um, we already have--"

Before I can finish my sentence, Rohan jumps up from her bean bag chair and grabs the closest object to her--which happens to be a pricey antique of an exotic, flashy, sparkly bee--and sends it flying to the other side of the room, shattering on the wall. "You butt-faced fungus-toed girl! You never told us that! How long ago was this?!" So we're just going to ignore the fact that she destroyed her mom's gift to her and called me a butt-faced girl with fungus between my toes? I guess so.

"Um, at the bonfire a while ago? In a dirty car that gave me that rash I had on my arm for a week." Peton's glasses start to fog and Rohan stands stock still. It looks like she's about to fall over dead but I guess I'll just have to wait and see. Not sure if I'll catch her though; I'm not really comfortable touching dead things. Or dead things that have a probability of jumping back up and "teaching me a lesson".

Peton takes her magenta glasses off and lays them on the heavenly soft I'm-Going-To-Marry-This-Carpet. "You kissed. That long ago. And didn't tell us about it?" In an instant she leans over and slaps the side of my head. Something that would've probably hurt if I wasn't such a special girl. "Why didn't you tell us?!" Well, maybe because I don't like being cornered by my friends and jumped at school at the age of seventeen. I still need my face for future reasons and I figured that keeping a secret would be a better way of preventing that.

My group of friends are vicious beings that show no mercy.

"Because you guys would've flipped! And nobody asked if we kissed." I let out a sigh. "Even if it was perfect in the weirdest way." They both lay on their stomachs in front of me, smiling.

"Tell us what the crap happened. I need to know so I can write about it in my journal after I write my share of internal, rude thoughts about you for making me wait this long. I'm already thinking of a few adjectives." Way to pump up my confidence, Peton! You're so nice.

"That's so cute. Agastya's a sweetheart, I promise you. He's like an Oreo: Hard on the outside, soft on the inside." Rohan is smiling so big, it's indescribable. Peton's been pretty quiet the whole story and right now, she's just spaced out into her deep thought pose.

"What're you thinking about, Peton? Huh? Huh?" Rohan playfully nudges Peton's arm with her elbow. "Perhaps it's a boy of your own?" Peton? And a boy? I've never thought Peton to be the type of girl with a boyfriend since she's never even had one.

Now that I think of it, she's never even talked about having a crush on anybody. She always said school comes first and then after that she can focus on boys. I'm pretty sure managing an A+ average for five years means she can focus on boys, but who knows. She's Peton; she thinks the food pyramid is wrong and has proven it. . . that's pretty smart to me. My problem is I flunk the classwork, but ace the mandatory tests.

For the first time, Peton blushes and then shoves Rohan back. "No! I don't have a crush on a boy! School work comes first. I've already told you guys this. Drop it; I was just spacing out for a second."

"You spaced out because you're thinking about a boy. Is it that guy, Valie?" Rohan's persistent isn't she?

"No. Valie's a big bully to everybody. Why on Earth would I like him? I hate him."

Since we're finally off of picking on me, I can pick on Peton, too! Let's bully together, Rohan! We can make her feel horrible and get away with it since we're friends! "Is it your best friend, Marion?" Oh, I give myself conceited props for that pun. Great, I just mentally created a geek in me.

Ever since she fought Decana and Marion dragged her out of the cafeteria; they've had beef with each other. Constant bickering in the hallways, always under each other's skin--mainly from him being a pest on purpose to her and bothering her just to see her reaction--which a couple of times has actually been funny. I'm not letting her know that since she'll make us join the wrestling team with Marion just so she can beat me and him up, legally. Somehow they exchanged numbers but they don't do anything but text fight.

To my and Rohan's surprise, Peton blushes again. "Definitely not! I hate him the most. He's always, like, just. . . ugh. Don't even get me started on him. He shouldn't have broken me away from Decana. I could've had her."

"If you hate him so much, why are you blushing so hard? Huh? Huh? It's okay to like somebody, Peton. It's not the end of the world if you do. Or your grades." Peton shifts uncomfortably in the position and puts her glasses back on, ignoring Rohan's statement. Answer the poop-eyed girl, Peton! I wanna know this information, too! Don't leave me like this, Peton. I will make you get a B if you don't answer her.

She continues to gather up her stuff and starts to walk out of the room. "Me and Varnika have to go, Rohan. I'll text you later and I'm glad your aunt's okay." She turns to face me right before reaching the door. "C'mon, Varnika." Who agreed that I'm going with you? I might've had plans to do something today. Like possibly watching a movie I've already seen four times in theaters and still crying at the ending. Or go down to the park and steal candy from a baby. I heard it's easy.

"Peton, don't be mad! I'm just playing with you! Kind of. . . Sort of. . . Well, not really but still!" Peton doesn't even wait for me to make up an excuse as to why I can't go with her and grabs my arm, yanking me out of the doorway--once again--ignoring Rohan.

Maybe I can squeeze out a few last words. "Um, bye, Rohan! I'll text you later! And my mom wanted me to give you--" Wow, Peton. I've never seen you so frustrated before. Slamming doors in people's faces in their house and getting away with it? That's the way of a true gangster life.

"Peton you can't be so mean! We were only playing around--"

"Shut up and get in the car."

"But--"

"Get in, fool." Oh, we're name calling. This is a whole new level. Just get in the car before she decapitates you in public. Slowly, I ease myself into her red Mazda and buckle my seat belt as she gets in the driver's seat and skirts out of Rohan's driveway--which by the way is very stunning compared to my horror movie one. Pretty sure they would use it if they could; my driveway and my dimples. Cue the scary sound effects.

After several minutes of awkward driving and her blaring opera music, I believe it's time to say something. I don't even know what the heck this lady is screaming about. Why can't it just be in English and not some language no one speaks? For all we know she could be plotting a m******e and nobody would know about it until after they translate the song. See? It's dangerous.

"Peton," Her hands ring around the steering wheel even tighter, making her knuckles white as I click my tongue and sarcastically nod my head. "Um, do you really hate Marion that much? He's not a bad person or anything; I think he just likes messing with you. We didn't mean to hurt your feelings or make you mad back there. I just didn't think you'd get so worked up over it."

She jabs her hand forward with such a force that if it was a person it would've been straight up homicide, turning off the radio and taking a short glare my way. I'm staring at the devil through my best friend's eyes. Though I could just be really sleepy and hallucinate everything including that soda-sized rabbit that may or may not be on the dashboard. "It's fine if you don't wanna talk about it. I comp--"

"I just don't know how to react to it!" Observing the situation that we're in a small car and the only ones in it--I feel that yelling isn't necessary, Peton. I'm going to need you to bring that down 5 decibels.

"React to what?" React to people, dogs, cats, pretty things, criminals, potatoes--what?

She lets out a heavy breath and her muscles all relax. "I don't know how to react to feelings. Like if you like somebody: how are you supposed to let them know? Do you play hard to get or do you sit there and hope they ask you? It's so stupid. Why can't everybody stop being afraid of being rejected and just come out and state the obvious?" So that explains why she's so sensitive on the subject. She's never had a crush on someone and she's scared of how to respond to the matter.

Poor Peton, so young and clueless. Like Rohan's mom.

"Well, if you like someb--"

"Shut up! We're here now, so you can get out of the car." In seconds, she opens her door and slams it shut behind her leaving me in a daze as she enters her white-wooded home. Bipolar much? Feelings aren't a felony or a test; calm down. Jeez.

I walk out of the car and up her two steps to get into her house and see her already rounding the corner to her left, entering her room. She's so bossy that sometimes I wonder if it's an effect of not having the same parents growing up. Could just be a stress reliever or a way to cope.

In her room, there's nothing but pure junk. She may be smart but she's the fastest mess maker I know. It wasn't even that long ago since I was here and now her room is practically destroyed like she held the last ogre meeting in here. Not to mention her whole family is missing out of the house which is highly unusual. "Where's your family?"

She sits down on her unmade bed and grabs her laptop from a pile of rubble that contains finished food, papers, clothes and jewelry. "They're out at dinner. Some trashy place with flies eating the meal with them, I bet." Ew, there are just some things you just don't tell people. And I can't even sit down anywhere without thinking some salivating creature will pop from the rubble and attack my thigh muscles while it pees on my feet.