Not Real. Not Imaginary.

PART FIVE: NINA. [The cursed Priestess]

She was standing in front of us, smiling as she was before, in the path, but now she seemed different; there was something…’lighter’ about her. The atmosphere around the place seemed to lighten up too. Despite still being abandoned, it didn’t seem so desolated anymore.

The little girl wiggled until I had to put her down, or else, she would’ve fallen down. As soon as I put her down, she ran towards the female, that had just materialized in front of us, and hugged her.

The young woman looked down at the girl, and hugged her. I looked at them, and I couldn’t help but to feel, like I was watching two sisters hugging each other. The little girl stretched her arms up, and the young woman carried her.

I didn’t understand however…why was she stalking me in the forest? Why did she seem so scary and why was she …growling? She had acted rather strange before. The girl in front of me, seemed like an entirely different person, just with the same appearance. I mean, was it necessary to be that creepy just to lead us all the way here?

“I’m sorry if I scared you. I kind of was…stuck, I guess? I still am, but it was different back there.” Her tone was really gentle, as if she was speaking to a child.

I looked at her confused: it was like she had read my mind.

“It’s…okay.” I wasn’t sure of how to respond; I wasn’t even sure of who she was, and why were we there…

“You must’ve been really scared, seeing all those shards and…well, I wasn’t in my best behavior back there either…for a while. I was trapped in my own resentment...”

For someone having resentment, she sure seemed too cheery and gentle.

“Resentment?”

It was all very confusing for me, and right then, I really needed two things: one, a good rest, because I felt like I had been walking for forever before getting to that place, and two…I needed answers. The whole journey had been one filled with confusion…and I was sick of it. I hated this feeling of not knowing what to do.

“Oh! Yeah…I guess I should explain some things…sorry. Let’s go somewhere you can rest a little bit.” She started walking towards one of the buildings.

When we walked inside, I noticed the thick coat of dust we had seen before in all the buildings, was completely gone. I walked all around the room we were in, while the young woman sat on a sort of really old rocking chair.

All the traces of abandonment were gone. It was as if that…house, had been inhabited the whole time. I was really curious about what had happened with it all. Why did things change so drastically all of a sudden…why was her so important for that place?

I don’t know how I came to the realization that she was important for the place itself, but it just suddenly hit me. It was as if I already knew, but I had forgotten…it was the weirdest feeling…in that moment, at least.

“You should take a seat. You’ve been walking a lot…and running and…sorry.” She looked at me apologetically as she rocked in the chair, with the little girl in her arms.

“What?” I hadn’t really heard her very well, I was still distracted by everything around me, and by the realization that had just came to me.

“For chasing you back there. I just felt your…loneliness, and it made me remember…” She looked out at the distance and sighed.

“Oh…It’s okay, I guess. I mean, you don’t seem the type to do that just because, so…” I wasn’t even sure of what I was saying. I was still very confused at the whole situation.

I had been transported to a weird colorful world, that turned out to be a lot scarier than the regular world; I was stalked, and…lured, by a shiny stone. I felt like a cartoon character being attracted into a very obvious tramp, with something so simple as a shiny stone. I was embarrassed of myself now.

“I’m sorry for that. I really needed you to take that stone…I am not sure why it kept scaping. Maybe it just thought you weren’t ready, but that’s just silly. She wouldn’t have brought you here if you weren’t.”

I tried to follow what she said, but I was just as lost as before, or even more.

“I am so confused.” I brought myself to confess. If I wanted answers, I would have to give away the fact that I didn’t know what was happening at all.

“Oh…I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have assumed that…I’m so sorry.” She looked at me, with pity almost and that made me feel a little upset. “Well, this little girl brought you here so you could get, what you lost, back. Or at least a part of it.” She looked at me intently, and I just nodded, letting her know I understood that, and I was following. “You already have a part of the...puzzle.” She looked down at the little girl, that was now sleeping in her arms.

“I guessed as much but still…what is this place?” I looked around me furrowing my brows.

I already knew who the little girl was, why she was here, and why I had to find her but…I didn’t know why I had to be here, what this place was…or who that young woman was.

“Well, first…I…I don’t know how to say this…” She looked troubled.

“Who are you?” I asked, trying to help her give up the information that she was keeping for me.

“I am the ‘Mother Priestess’…at least in this place. I was born with a certain…gift…that I used to help people; so, people started to look up to me and gave me an unnecessary title, and status. I was the one everyone went to when they needed answers, when they were afflicted…or sick...”

She did give a motherly vibe…but she seemed so young...

“I’m sorry. That must’ve been really hard.”

I suddenly felt sorry for her, being so young and having to carry all that weight in her shoulders…

“It’s okay. I liked to help the people. But after a while it got a little…. They started to worship me more than just, thinking of me as someone that could try to help them. And I wouldn’t get a moment of rest after that. I was always surrounded by people, someone always wanted something from me…demanded something from me...” She looked at the girl again and smiled.

There was a short moment of silence, as she seemed to collect her thoughts, and I wouldn’t dare to break it, simply because I didn’t know what to say.

“You know…sometimes not having people around you might not be the worst thing in the world. It is better to be alone than to be surrounded by people that only want you to give, until you don’t know if there is anything else left inside of you to give. Sometimes…being surrounded by people that…’worry about you’, is much lonelier.” She smiled sadly at me.

I stayed quiet again, not because I didn’t have anything to say, but because I was too embarrassed. I knew why she was telling me that: I had fallen into a deep, spiraling void for years, because no one seemed to care for me…because no one wanted me close, because I was alone. But… I was never really lonely. There was someone there all the time with me, and I failed to acknowledge it…because I wanted to be normal, I wanted to pretend to be normal so everyone around me would love me.

“I had no one but myself, and they all had me. I was their ‘mother’, so, it was only natural that they took from their mother all they wanted. And I should take care of them because that was my role in this place. It was just the way things were…. I don’t regret it though; I am not complaining, I am just…I had to experience that, so you could eventually be free.”

My gaze, that had been on the floor that whole time, suddenly moved up, towards her. The puzzled look I gave to her, made her chuckle and nod.

“It is only natural that you’re confused. Things like this aren’t…very usual I guess.”

“But…if…if you were so important to them then…what happened? Why were you…?” I looked outside the window. The view we had was from the big wooden pole….

“Well…that wasn’t their fault. There will always be bad people that will prey on the weaker; conning and evil minds, that will just search for the way to convince you that you need something that will harm you. That’s what happened here: There was a decease spreading throughout the land, every kingdom and village was in danger, and everyone was scared. Some men stumbled upon our little village one day, and saw the people here was weak and dependent on one lonely girl, one helpless girl that couldn’t really do anything except seeing what was beyond…. They convinced the people that my sacrifice would serve as a protection for this land…. I was a threat for them, because I could see their ill intentions, and I would do all I could to protect the town.”

I was surprised that she didn’t seemed sad…not even a little, remembering that; but she had seemed sad before, when she explained what it was like to be her.

“That makes no sense. If they knew you and that you would protect them…then why would they listen to them?” I was outraged at the blindness of the people, and the obvious outcome of that situation.

“It just made sense to them. They were convinced that my abilities were limited by my mortality. So, it was only logical that once it wasn’t in the way anymore, I would be stronger and then...and then, my protection would reach levels we could have only dreamt of. My ashes were supposed to be like a blessing for the land...” She shrugged and the little girl complained in her sleep.

“But that’s not how things went…is it?”

She shook her head.

“No; I knew that things wouldn’t be like that. But I underestimated the power of convincing those men had…and…in the end…I was unable to protect them all. I died…and I was filled with resentment, for being born with those abilities, and being forced to be what I was for those people. And mostly I was filled with resentment towards myself, for not being stronger and able to protect them as I was supposed to.” She sighed and looked at the little girl again, making sure she was still sleeping peacefully.

“But I am still confused about…why am I here?” I confessed a little ashamed.

Seeing my shame drew a small smile on her lips, and I’m sure she didn’t giggle just because the slightest movement could wake the lil girl up.

“She brought you to me because you’re a little incomplete right now. You were fractured, and you hid all these pieces of you deep within, because they were too much to deal with at the time. You already got one of them. And…I guess I am the second one.” She spoke as if it was nothing, but I thought that it was really important information that I would’ve liked to know from the start.

“And now that I am here…what?”