Broken Boundaries

CH5 heavy Damange

The smell of Cologne pulls me out of the darkness of my nightmare, but a familiar one it smells like sandalwood and leather very masculine, Jace it must be. I try opening my eyes, but they feel so heavy. I go to move my arm but can’t I’m finally able to hear a little and when I do, I’m listening to a strong low voice talking to a woman I don’t know.

“Yes, doc I understand but this isn’t a normal panic attack she’s had those before. this was like something else we couldn’t get her to stop fighting till paramedics came and gave her something to knock her out a tranquilizer if you will.”

The alarm on some machine goes off and I hear the woman walk around my bed and turn it off. Mr. Morrison call me Jace ok Mr. Jace Ms. Richardson has a horrible past that has a trauma, unlike anyone I’ve seen, her mind and body may react differently when stressed.”

“We will never know how she may act simply put; this was triggered by something that triggered her most traumatic memory so naturally her mind went to that place, and she fought like she was reliving that memory”.

“She isn’t even aware of this herself so I believe when she wakes, she will need some stronger meds and therapy again.”

“She should be waking soon I won’t bother her until then but keep in mind Ms. Richard is mentally unstable right now so let’s not ask too many questions just yet. “

“Yes, mam” Jace replies I hear him drag a chair closer to the bed and he grabs my hand. I feel my hand lifted and placed somewhere warm and scruffy, what I would assume is his face. It feels so warm and then wet I realize then he was crying but why I’m ok. I tried my hardest to squeeze his hand back, but it came out a soft flutter of fingers that sent him standing. “Clara! Clara! Are you awake” he’s rubbing my arm up and down I manage to mumble out water ok hold on I’ll get water, he comes back and pushes a small paper cup to my lips I greedily take a sip, and more till its empty. I can feel the icy water traveling through my body and hitting the bottom of my stomach, telling me I must have been here awhile without food or drink. Feeling confident I cough a couple of times and clearing my throat to speak “Ah And here we f*****g go again……. I mean good morning I chuckle, why can’t I open my eyes or move my arms I say in this unfamiliar gruff voice.”

Jace chuckles “Well my darling you scratched your eyes a bit during your extreme panic attack, so Doctor Berry put some stuff on them and these eye pads to help them heal up”. “We don’t want any scars on those beautiful eyes of yours, as far as the arms they have them strapped down because we didn’t know how you would respond coming out of the induced sleep”.

I take a couple of deep breaths before I start my onslaught of questions. “What happened Jace I bet Mrs. Julie is freaked out because of me now and I’ve ruined everything I’ve been trying so hard to connect with everyone.” I hear Jace stand up and start pacing the room walking back in forth and probably scratching his neck, something he does when he is nervous about something. “Mrs. Julie is fine just shaken up a bit, she seems super worried about you though not freaked out considering.” “Considering what?” I say shocked “What do you mean, what have I done? Oh my god please tell me I didn’t hurt her”. Jace comes around to the front of my bed he grabs my hand caressing it, Clara she is ok in the middle of your attack you went to this other place in your head something I’ve never seen you do before. Wherever you went wasn’t good because your office is wrecked, and Mrs. Julie was with you and tried her best to calm you down but whatever was going on in your head you took it out on her, and you stabbed her in the hand with a pencil.

I sat for a couple of moments just letting everything he said sink in. “Can you unstrap my hands please and when can I have this stupid crap off my eyes,” I say with a voice trembling in fear. Yeah, hold on I’ll call the doc and let her know you’re awake and get this all off you. I hear him walk over to the door and open it as he goes through under his breath, I hear him say “I can’t lose you” The door closes, and I don’t react till I hear the click. The sobs are overpowering my throat. I try so hard to contain them, but the burn is too much they spew out of my mouth in heavy waves. Why do I have to be so f****d up, so f*****g broken I’ve finally thought I found pieces of me to where I didn’t have to have therapy or meds, and look at me now a hot mess on an uncomfortable hospital bed being a b***h. Time to suck it up Clara crying doesn’t solve your problems, we made it this far we just gotta stay strong. My pep talk seems to work as my body begins to tremble less and the tears stop, I try to move my arms and I moan against the arm restraints wishing Jace to return soon with the doc. I feel like a prisoner, The door clicks open, and I hear someone walk in “Jace?” I say but the footsteps stop shy of my bed.

“Jace, did you bring the doc I want these damn things off and my eyes feel itchy can we take those off too now please?” Still nothing but silence. “Jace? Who is in here? look the doctor is coming and so is my friend so you better leave now.” My body is tense, and the danger alarms are fully engaged.

“What’s wrong baby girl did my love letters upset you tisk tisk.” His voice was low it sent fear into every inch of my body, I wanted to scream and pull this damn s**t off my eyes so I can see the sick ass hole that had been tormenting me for weeks. But when I tried to voice out I couldn’t the terror had my throat closed shut my mouth dry I tried pulling against the restraints desperate to have my arms for protection. As I pulled with no effort his rough hand on my ankle slid sickeningly upwards to my thigh. I squirm kicking all the sheets off me desperate, I find the words stop! which catches him off guard in the sudden halt of his hand I manage to finally kick a blow into him as I hear him grunt in displeasure.

“Oooh feisty I love it when they’re feisty it makes me want you more. but in due time my temptress you will fully be mine and I’ll have you for as long as I want, I don’t want to kill you off too soon”. “I’ve waited too long for this” His hand had disappeared from my thigh but found its new home on my neck he squeezes it making it hard to breathe. I struggle against the restraints and tears are starting to pour from under the pads covering my eyes. I can feel his unshaven prickly face brushing mine as he whispers in my ear now Clara, I know you can’t wait to spend more time with me and I can’t with you but I don’t feel like being caught before I get to play with you, that wouldn’t be good for us”. “S until then pick up my calls answer my texts or everything you hold dear to you will slowly disappear.”

At that, he bites my ear and releases my neck in a couple of swift strides as he was outside the door. I break down crying again, shaking in disgust, I start screaming for help and within minutes I hear multiple people come into my room. I tell them to take the restraints off and these eye pad things. They keep telling me to calm down, but I can’t, I tell them there was a man in here with me and all the details, but they keep assuring me there wasn’t that the only man that’s been to my room was Jace. I start screaming at them to believe me when I smell him enter the room. I instantly started to calm down. “What the f**k is going I hear him roar” The others in the room went silent. I then feel him tugging at my wrist “Can y’all get these damn things off her now! Look at her f*****g wrist” At that I started to worry. I felt other hands on me as they began to unstrap me. Soon my hands were free, I held them to my chest, starting to rub them but being told quickly not to as they needed bandaging from me pulling against them, I waited till they got done before asking if I could have the eye pads taken off now. I was quickly shut down with a “We must see if the doctor is ready for that we will bring her back to you.” They started to proceed out of the room when I was engulfed in that same manly cologne and his intense heat all captured in a bear hug.

“God Clara what the hell is going on I’m out of the room for 30 minutes and I come back to nurses running into a room and you screaming your head off”. “Jace someone was in here I’m not losing my mind the same guy who wrote these creepy ass text messages to me and the phone calls he even left notes to Mrs. Julia to give to me.” Jace squeezed me a bit harder and then pulled away. I can feel the heat of his gaze on my face. “Clara, they said no one has been in here besides me”. “They are wrong Jace he said some sick s**t to me I felt his hand go up to my thigh and he grabbed my neck, tell them to check the cameras”. When the door opened, I could hear Jace stand and say doc politely. “Hi Clara, I’m Doctor Berry I’ve been taking care of you since you came. How are you feeling?” “I don’t know scared shitless,” I say a little too sarcastically “ok I can get that. Now I want you to understand you had a very severe panic attack do you know what might have caused it.”

No, I don’t think I know…my mind stops running before I can process, and I yell “Baby girl.” I hear the doctor come over she puts a stethoscope up to my chest and then back she then tells me to lie back a minute “Are you ok with me feeling on your legs.?” “Y-y-yes,” I say weirdly She starts at my ankle then begin feeling move up and stops at my knee. The flashbacks of what happened moments ago come back to my mind in full force as I start hyperventilating the pressure on my chest returning. The doctor quickly stops and comes to the front of the bed. “Clara…Clara, I need you to breathe you are ok and in a safe space.” I felt Jace beside me and I grabbed his hand and brought it to my face. I inhale and exhale in big gasps calming myself down. Once my episode is over the doctor goes to my neck where I tell her the man grabbed me. She checks me over but doesn’t say anything, but I can feel the mood in the room change Jace hand against my face still has become firm then gentle and the hair on his hand and his arm touching me has raised. “Ok, Clara the doc says breaking the heavy silence in the room.” Yes? “Well, are you ready to get the gausses and pads off your eyes?” “Yes…. yes, I am I say hurriedly”. “Ok, it will be a moment but don’t open your eyes till I tell you OK.” “Yes, mam” I reply as she begins to cut away the gauze around my head. So that’s what was on my eyes gauze and some plastic circles, huh if it wasn’t for these damn things, I could have seen the creep that came in here and put my ass in the hospital in the first place.

I sigh in annoyance and then feel the sudden weight lift off my eyes. Jace still standing beside me gives me a reassuring squeeze. “Ok Clara we are going to dim the lights a bit and then I want you to open your eyes slowly ok.” I hear her walk over and then back she counts to three and then tells me OK. At first, my eyes felt foreign, like they were cemented down. a couple of flutters and I managed to crack them open halfway. My vision was a little hazy before coming in full view of a large woman leaning over me her hair was brown but had silver strands throughout, she looked about fifty her sweet warm face lit the dim room up and she had a gentleness about her as a grandma would. “There now you have some beautiful eyes, Mrs. Richards.” “Thank you,” I say with a small smile I look up to see Jace staring attentively at me before he leans down and hugs me. I chuckle when he pulls back ruffing my hair with his other hand. “Ok, Ms. Richards let’s do a quick eye test.”

After some flashes in front of my eyes and having followed her fingers, she clears me. She looks at Jace and asks him to step outside for a moment, they step outside for ten minutes I can see them through the blinds of the room talking and then joined by two police officers…shit, I say to myself I’m going to go to jail for assault I can see it I’m going to lose my job and everything. They all walked in with Jace reaching me first. “Clara the police just want to take a report from you on the guy who came in here and that’s been harassing you.” “Ok I say sitting up straighter, I thought you didn’t believe me though?” looking at the doctor and then at Jace. “No,” he says looking at me with a serious expression on his face “We believe you but couldn’t say anything just in case the guy was still around”. “The hospital was put on lockdown as soon you told the nurses who first came in here, but they didn’t catch anyone that wasn’t supposed to be here. So, he must have gotten out before the code was sent out and went through the stairwells”. The officer with a military buzz cut and tattoos covering eighty percent of his body then spoke, “Mam, we only caught him on a few the cameras.” “Apparently he isn’t working alone someone has cut some camera wire in the main server room and as far as exits the fire exit on the base floor was set off by someone, this is where we believe he got out.” The officer looks away in disappointment then at his partner. His partner looks at me and walks to the side of my bed and kneels in front of me. He, unlike his partner, has short black hair with sides shaved, no tattoos, but a scar on his right bicep that travels to his elbow. He looks at me with concern and chimes in “But we do have a squad looking into this investigation, we will find everyone involved Mrs. Richards. I think it may be best until this is resolved that you have someone stay with you or stay with someone.”

“Ok,” I say taking in all the new information that was just pushed in front of me. “Now Ms. Richards” Doctor Barry now speaking “we need to take pictures of your neck, legs, and wrist for the report are you ok with that?” That question brought on so many new emotions. I looked at my legs first, a small scratch ran from my ankle to thigh, and my wrist that are bandaged I could tell was bruised and bleeding. My hands fling to my throat, and I feel the tenderness where he squeezed, I begin to become emotional again thinking to myself clam down Clara don’t be such an emotional b***h you need to toughen up. Jace looking at me still gives me his playboy flashy grin that makes me laugh bringing me out of my emotional state. I look at the doctor and officers and tell them to proceed. As they snap away, I tell officers everything that had happened the past few weeks and how I had most of the letters and texts still. We set up a time after I’m discharged for me to come to the station with evidence afterward, they leave. Doctor Barry tells me she will reevaluate me in the morning and we will go from there on being discharged.