Chapter 8: Casual?
1212 Words
It's been a few weeks since River and I started working together on the chemistry project, and things have been... different.
For one, I hadn't told Diana about the project. She'd probably start asking all sorts of questions, maybe even tease me about it being a "study date" or something. And I wasn’t ready for that. Besides, it wasn’t that important. It’s just a project, right? We’d meet up, work on it, and go our separate ways. That was it.
But lately, it feels like my interactions with River have been decreasing. His messages have become fewer. The last time we met, we barely spoke beyond what was necessary for the work. I tried to brush it off, telling myself it was probably just his way of being efficient. We were both busy, after all.
I miss our conversations—well, not that I’d ever admit that to anyone, especially to Diana. But those little moments, like when he asked about my music, when he noticed how I played and felt the song… I didn’t expect him to notice, because most people I talk to don’t. The way he was different from everyone else—it meant something to me.
But now, we hardly talk. No more stories or banter. I couldn't help but wonder if it was my fault. Did I do something wrong? Or worse—did he lose interest?
I tried not to overthink it. River has always been casual, and maybe I was just reading too much into things. It’s not like we had something going on. But those little moments—those simple interactions, like when our hands brushed in the library or when he genuinely seemed to care about the project—those lingered in my mind.
Today, I noticed it again. River walked past me in the hallway, his head down, eyes on his phone. We made eye contact for a split second, but he didn’t even wave or smile like he usually did. I felt a sting, but I tried to act like I didn’t care. I told myself he was just busy.
But as the days passed, it felt like we weren’t even seeing each other anymore. Like I didn’t know him at all. I wanted to talk to him about it, but what was there to say? Hey, why aren’t we talking anymore? That sounded ridiculous, right? And I wasn’t the type to chase after someone.
Later that day, I was sitting at the coffee shop with Diana. She was doing her usual thing—teasing me about everything under the sun—but today, I didn’t have the energy to play along.
Diana immediately noticed. "What’s wrong with you? You’re so quiet today."
I shrugged, sipping my drink. "Nothing. Just tired, I guess."
She raised an eyebrow. "Tired from what? You’ve been sitting here doing nothing but waiting."
I blinked, trying to ignore the question. "Really, it’s nothing," I said casually. "Maybe I’m just busy."
Diana squinted at me, clearly unconvinced. "Busy? Hmm… Or maybe you’re just not telling me about your chemistry project anymore?"
I froze for a second. "Why would you say that?"
She smirked. "I don’t know. You haven’t mentioned River lately."
My chest tightened. "It’s nothing, Diana. It’s not that important."
"Oh, so it’s not important?" She raised an eyebrow, obviously teasing. "Even though it's your chemistry project?"
I sighed, trying to keep my voice steady. "I already told you. We’re just working on a project. Nothing more."
Diana leaned in, eyes narrowing with suspicion. "Jade, you’re lying. Something’s going on, you’re just not saying it!"
I looked at her and just shrugged, the truth hanging unspoken between us. "There’s nothing, Diana. That’s the truth."
Diana studied me for a moment before her expression softened. "Okay, okay. I’ll let it slide. But, it’s up to you."
The next day, I saw River again, but this time, he didn’t even glance my way. He was with his bandmates, laughing and joking around, completely ignoring me. I stood there for a second, feeling an odd mix of confusion and hurt.
His drummer noticed me, waving in my direction, so I smiled and waved back. That’s when River finally looked at me, probably wondering who his drummer was waving at. He just gave me a small, forced-looking smile and nodded. Ouch.
I thought we had something… but now it felt like he didn’t even notice me anymore.
I looked back at them, hoping he’d glance at me again, but nothing. His back was turned, as if I didn’t even exist.
I shook my head, trying to clear the thoughts from my mind. Nothing’s going to happen. I shouldn’t care about this, right?
Yet, despite telling myself that, a small part of me couldn’t help but wonder… Was this the beginning of the end of whatever this was between us?
The next day, River and I had another chemistry meeting. But this time, something felt different. He seemed even more distant, like the chemistry between us had fizzled out. His responses were short, and even though we were in the same room, it felt like we were worlds apart.
I sat across from him, my notebook open, but the silence between us was deafening. He wasn’t even looking at me, focused on his phone as usual.
I finally broke the silence. "So… what’s up?" I tried to sound casual, but my voice betrayed me.
He looked up from his phone, our eyes meeting for a brief moment before he shrugged. "Nothing. Just thinking..."
I furrowed my brows. "About what?"
"Chemistry," he said without missing a beat. "The project. We need to finish it on time, right?"
I nodded, relieved that he was at least taking the work seriously. "Yeah. That’s the plan. But… are you okay?"
He hesitated, the tension in the air thickening. Then, he let out a sigh. "I’m fine. Don’t worry about it."
I couldn’t shake the feeling that something was off. But I didn’t push. "Okay."
We went back to our work in silence, but every now and then, I caught him glancing at me from the corner of his eye. It was strange. Why did it feel like we were both avoiding something? Was he… avoiding me?
Later that night, I couldn’t stop thinking about it. The way things had changed. The way he was acting. And I couldn’t help but wonder.
Was it all just in my head, or was River really pulling away?
The next morning, I went through my usual routine, trying to shake off the uncertainty settling in my chest. I told myself I was overthinking things, that it was just a phase. But the nagging feeling wouldn’t go away.
I spotted River at school later that day, but this time, I didn’t feel that familiar pull toward him. He was with his bandmates again, laughing and chatting as if nothing had changed.
And for a moment, I wondered if I had made everything up in my head. Was it really just a project? Was it casual? Or was there something more?
I don’t know what to think anymore. All I know is that I can’t ignore the way things have shifted between us. And I’m not sure if I want to.
- Writer
