My heart is pounding. Much more than could be considered "normal".
I'm not well, I'd be lying through my teeth if I thought of it that way.
I just had s*x with Anthony, he just sank into me, I just had an orgasm, it was intense, surreal, I felt appreciated and I hate the damn feeling in my stomach, the one that turns into an advertisement, the one that looms chaos. The irremediable chaos.
And he remains silent, even after I've asked him openly what I should do about what I'm feeling automatically after what happened.
He says nothing, just watches me. Impassive, his beautiful blue eyes. Blue like the sky, like the sea, like the depth. As clear as water, as honesty.
I wish what just happened was part of the contract and meant nothing to me, or to him. But I see it in his eyes, he feels
