DEAR GODDESS
1433 Words
NATALIA
I was lucky enough to find a cheap place to stay right after I got far enough, but I would have to leave and run away as far as I could before they found me.
“Thank you.” I returned the keys to my room and quickly went out of the inn, only to be surprised by who was waiting for me outside.
Tristan stood a little distance from the entrance of the inn, looking at me with hope in his eyes. It wasn’t a reaction I was expecting, but my body automatically moved, running away from him.
“Natalia, wait!”
I ran as if my life depended on it because it was, but there were humans around, and I couldn’t use my real speed. Tristan quickly caught me, grabbing my arm to stop me.
“Please, let me go,” I pleaded in a low voice. I couldn’t garner humans’ attention, as it would only complicate things.
“I’ll let you go, but promise me that you won’t run. I just want to talk. I swear it to my pack. Please give me a chance to talk to you. It's all I ask.” His hold on me loosened, and I could have already run away if I wanted to, but seeing the sincerity in his eyes made me question my decisions in life.
An Alpha’s word is his pack’s, and to go against it is his pack’s shame. No alpha speaks light of this, and you can only hear it when two packs have certain agreements. That’s how I know he was serious with his words and it’s confusing me. I don’t even know how he found me.
He smiled after seeing me calm down. “Thank goodness you’re alright. I was really worried about you.”
I looked at him in disbelief. Yes, Tristan was kind to me before he met his fated mate, but we barely talked before our engagement. Our first weeks of marriage were very awkward because of that. Both of us were too formal with each other until we warmed up to each other one day.
Why is he speaking so casually to me now?
“Where are we?” I asked.
In the end, he convinced me to go with him. I was still nervous, but he drove away from our pack territories’ directions and brought me to a house. My eyes roamed the place. It was a humble but well-maintained place.
“It’s a place I bought and go to whenever I want to be alone. Don’t worry. No one knows about this place, not even my pack members. You’re free to stay here as much as you want.” He responded as he put his things on the table.
I continued staring at him. I can’t help but question the situation. He was way too calm when I practically ruined his and my pack’s agreement.
“I-I’m sorry, but I’m still confused. Why are you doing this, Alpha? How did you even find me?” Questions kept pouring out of me in frustration.
I ran away because I didn’t want our fates to be entwined for the second time, but here I am with the same person I’m trying to escape from. At this time, he hasn’t done anything wrong to me. We were both unfortunate souls bound with our duties to our pack.
I thought this was my second chance. Why is fate making all of this so hard to bear?
He gestured for me to sit before he responded, “I went to your pack, hoping that we could have a decent talk before the wedding and learned that you escaped. Your father was furious, but I managed to calm him, and then I proceeded to find you. It took me a while, but I was able to track you.”
“You’re that familiar with my scent?”
Our kind has exemplary senses, but Alphas are in a different league. Still, finding someone who is not familiar with them in a human-populated place with all the scents mixed with chemicals and everything makes it almost impossible, yet he found me in a matter of hours.
Tristan chuckled awkwardly, “I guess you never noticed, but I’ve been interested in you since we were young. I never get the chance to hold a proper conversation with you, but I always look forward to your visit in our pack.”
I’m sure that everything he said won’t be true in the future, but I couldn't help but feel so happy hearing his remark. Is this the change that happened because I went back in time?
Alpha Tristan looked at me with affection I’ve rarely seen in his eyes. “I never intend to rush you. It was our fathers who wanted to rush the marriage. Imagine that I have to act disappointed when your sister refused the engagement when the truth is I’m relieved.”
“H-hey, she’s still my sister,” I exclaimed, but my voice faltered.
Tristan chuckled, “I didn’t mean it like that. She’s a commendable she-wolf and all, but it’s you that I love. I don’t like that she’s mean to you, either.”
“Wait, love?!”
His eyes widened, and he seemed to realize the words that came out of his own mouth but eventually smiled guiltily. “I was planning on confessing a cooler way, but yes. I’ve been in love with you for years, Natalia.”
--
“You’re sleeping there?” I asked in confusion.
We ended up staying at his house for the whole day. I was worried that our packs would launch a full-on search party for the both of us, one to find Tristan and another to pursue and kill me, but he assured me that it was okay and he would explain the situation when we got back. I don’t know how tomorrow will go, but Tristan said to let us savor the day of peace at least.
Tristan gave a small nod. “Yes. There’s only one room here. I’ll sleep on the couch.”
My eyes widened, and I quickly opposed the idea. “This is your house. I can’t let you do that. I’ll sleep on the couch.”
“Natalia, please do as I say. I won’t let you sleep on the couch. I’ll be okay.”
Seeing that we’ll eventually go back and forth with this, I proposed a solution on a whim but quickly regretted it. My eyes landed on the pillows between us. The bed was big enough for us, but it was still awkward.
Tristan cleared his throat, also feeling the awkwardness. “Can I ask something?”
“Yes?” I responded, looking at the ceiling as I couldn’t hold eye contact.
“Why did you choose to run away? I thought you agreed to our engagement voluntarily.”
My heart skipped a beat, realizing that we had to talk about it eventually.
“I’m sorry. I was scared, and I wanted to back out, but my father didn’t support me. I thought escaping was the right thing to do.” I uttered. I don’t know how things changed when I went back in time. I figured there would be consequences to this, but not something in my favor.
Tristan suddenly got up and slightly towered over me. “Why?”
I was surprised by his sudden gesture and instinctively backed away, forgetting that we were in a bed and that it had an end. I closed my eyes, anticipating pain from the fall, but I felt a hand on my back and gently pulled me back.
Tristan’s face, mere inches away from mine, was what welcomed me when I opened my eyes.
The look in his eyes felt so familiar, as I have seen that look so many times in the mirror: hope mixed with desperation. That’s what it is. It quickly brought me back to the time when I was still hoping to fix my marriage, even though deep inside, I knew it was impossible.
“I know this is very sudden for both of us, but I promise that I’m certain with what I feel. I want you to be my Luna, but the decision is up to you and I would respect it no matter what.”
Tristan gave a small smile. I can’t remember the last time he smiled like that to me. I miss it. I yearn for it.
And dear Goddess, I think I’m about to make another mistake.
- Writer
