ONLY TIME WILL TELL

VI: Normal

“So how long ago did your brother die?” Jolene chances to ask Daryl as they walk back. 

“It was a few months ago...actually almost a year now.” He says. 

“I'm sorry Daryl...what happened?” 

“He was killed by somebody, but what do you care? You hated my brother…”

“What? No I didn't! I was scared of him if anything. And I was worried you might end up like him. In and out of juvy...getting in fights all the time...you weren't like him…” 

“Yeah right” Daryl responds sarcastically. “Or was this because I chose him over you?”

Jolene stopped walking and stood shocked for a moment. Daryl turns around and looks at her. “What?”

“You're f*****g kidding right? You really think I resent your dead brother because you stayed behind with him when I left?! Daryl that was 20 years ago, I was 16! I thought I was in love and that it would fix everything! I was an i***t!”

She stands waiting for a response from him. 

He just grunts “c’mon” and keeps walking. 

She trudges behind him stewing at his accusation. They walk the remainder in silence with Daryl leading the way. When the gate is in view through the trees Jolene suddenly has a realization. 

“How’re we gonna get back in?” she asks Daryl.

“Don’t worry, I know a way.” he responds. 

It was still fairly early in the morning so she was hoping that nobody would realize their absence, but didn’t know what the schedules were like. She also remembers that she is supposed to be working with Abraham today so hopefully she doesn’t get there too late. 

Daryl leads her to the area where they are expanding the fence. Nobody was there quite yet, thankfully, so he leads her to a door that goes through a building connected to the gate on the other side. They walk through and Daryl leads her behind the houses so they don’t have to walk down the main street, in case anybody was awake already. It has to be around 7am, Jolene thinks. He leads her to her “guest” house and they take the back door inside. Daryl follows her inside the kitchen. Jolene wonders if she will ever get rid of him. 

“I would get some more sleep if I was you. You gotta meet Abraham in about an hour.” he says to her as he walks through the kitchen into the living room. She realizes that she’s hungry, but she follows him to see if he is leaving through the front. 

He takes off his backpack and crossbow and puts them next to the couch in the living room. He sits down on the couch and props his feet up on the coffee table  prompting Jolene to ask, “What’re you doing?” 

“You think I’m gonna leave you here to sneak off again Jo? I’m takin’ the couch so you can’t get out of our deal little girl.” he says, pointing to her. 

Dammit, she thinks. He was too smart. She was hoping she could slip away again, but having been defeated she finally slips her backpack off and lets it fall with a noticeable thud to the floor. Daryl scowls at her biting his inner lip again. Sexy and smart, she thinks as she takes off her jacket and throws it on top of her pack. She bends down and opens the backpack to get a protein bar again. 

She goes into the kitchen to stand at the island and eat. She gets one of the water bottles from the fridge and drinks that with her breakfast. She considers going upstairs to go back to sleep, but thinks better of it. She felt like if she went back to sleep she wouldn’t want to get back up again. She stands there leaning against the counter wondering what to do with herself for an hour. She hadn’t had time like this to herself in quite a while.

Her mind inadvertently wanders back to Daryl. She was amazed that the feelings she had for him still linger just under the surface: not the same obsessive love as before, but now more of an affection for him. She wishes now that she could have been with him, helped him before with his brother.  She starts looking around for something to do. She decides to go get her backpack and put back the food and water she had taken. 

When she gets to the living room she sees Daryl laying on the couch with his feet up on the armrest and his right arm around his eyes, sleeping. She walks over and takes a moment to take him in. He looked so peaceful and she was surprised that he didn’t scowl in his sleep. She comes around the side of the couch and bends down to get a closer look at him. He looked so ragged, but masculine. His arms were chiseled and she feels that all too familiar itch to jump his bones. She leans up over his mouth, considering kissing him, but just breathes in. His smell was intoxicating to her. She gets inches from his mouth, but before their lips touch he mumbles, “what’re you doing?” Jolene sits back quickly and stands up. 

“Sorry, nothing.” she responds quietly, not sure if it was directed at her.

“Hm.” is his response as he seems to fall back asleep.  

She goes back to the hallway and grabs her backpack. She takes it into the kitchen and starts unloading the food and water. She puts the food on the counter and the water bottles back in the fridge as she laughs at herself. f**k, that was close, she thinks. What were you thinking? You were the one who wanted to keep distance remember? Stop feeling things! Trying to distract herself from the sleeping man on her couch, she walks around the guest house two or three times just figuring out the layout. She discovers that there is a basement, which would be useful for hiding out if she needed to. Finally, she just decides to leave and go to her new “work site” since she couldn’t be left alone with her thoughts and Daryl. She just couldn’t trust herself. 

Before she leaves she heads upstairs to see if she could find a shirt that wasn’t see through. Abraham did not seem like a man to stay silent about a visible bra. She digs through the dresser and finally finds a grey shirt stuffed in the back of one of the drawers. She changes quickly and heads back downstairs. Daryl is still asleep so she sneaks by him quietly and goes out the front door. 

She notices that there are more people walking the streets now and suddenly she feels very nervous and vulnerable. She feels more exposed than when she was by herself in the woods. Everybody walks through the neighborhood as if everything is normal, which makes her nervous. Everything always seems great and normal before the end. She considers waking up Daryl to escort her, but thinks better of it. Instead she musters up as much courage as she can and heads down the porch to the construction site. About half way there a  tall woman with short brown hair waves to her and smiles. Jolene waves back apprehensively, not sure if it was directed at her. She looked like a rather brutish woman, very muscular and masculine.

“Hey” the woman says as she walks up to Jolene. “You’re the new girl, right? Jolene?” 

“Yees.” she answers, unsure. The woman’s height and voice was intimidating, but she seemed as overly friendly as the other people in this town.

“Hi I’m Francine. Welcome to Alexandria.” She says smiling and lifting her arms up in a welcoming gesture. Jolene smiles back apprehensively and nods at her. “So, you’re gonna be working with us on the expansion today, right?” she asks putting her hands on her hips.

“That’s what they tell me.” she responds, still smiling. 

“Great! So before we head over to meet the rest of the team we need to stop by the armory and get you a weapon. Since we are working out in the open it’s best you have protection, just in case.” She tells her. Jolene was surprised to hear that since Maggie just told her it takes time to get approval, but not wanting to seem like she couldn’t be trusted she just goes along with it. 

“Okay, lead the way.” she says to her. Francine seemed like a nice enough person, but Jolene remained apprehensive. They get to the armory and Francine checks out two automatic rifles and a couple clips of ammo from Olivia. They start discussing plans for the new part of the community, talking about growing vegetables and getting more space for more people. Jolene loads the rifle and puts the extra clips in her pocket. “Wow, you’re good with that.” Francine says when Jolene loads the rifle easily. 

“I’ve had a bit of practice.” she responds assuredly. Francine nods her head and says, “Maybe you could train some of the others around here. I, myself just learned how to use this thing.” 

That took Jolene back a bit and she gives her a brief look of confusion, then quickly focuses back on her gun. How is it that she just learned how to use a rifle?! She was getting a little jealous of how spoiled these people were, especially after getting a good look at their armory and the amount of weaponry available. There was everything from small pea-shooters and machetes to hand grenades. And their ammo seemed fairly well-stocked. Maybe a little low, but enough to last for some time. 

While in the armory another woman in a denim jacket with short grey hair comes in. Jolene gets a good look at her turquoise eyes as she glances at her. “Hey Carol, what can I get you today?” asks Olivia. 

“Oh...I’m thinking just a semi-auto. I’m going to go beyond the gate to pick some stuff up real quick. Shouldn’t need more than that…” she responds as she focuses her attention on Jolene standing behind Olivia. “Hi, I’m Carol” she says, offering her right hand to Jolene and smiling politely. 

Jolene takes her hand and shakes it firmly, giving her a smile of her own. “I’m Jolene, it’s great to meet you.” she responds. 

“Sorry we didn’t meet sooner, but I was preoccupied yesterday. So I heard you’re from Pennsylvania, is that right?” Carol asks her.

“Well, I grew up in Georgia and moved to Pennsylvania in High School with my parents.” Jolene responds. 

“Really? So that’s where you knew Daryl from?” Carol asks her.

“Uh... yeah, that’s where we originally met, when I was younger.” Jolene says, wondering why she would ask about Daryl. 

“Sorry, word travels fast in our small town. So is he the same now as he was then?” Carol asks. 

Jolene was surprised about the ease with which Carol discusses Daryl; she seemed to be the only one who was genuinely curious about him, rather than afraid or complacent. She takes a beat to think.

“Um, maybe a little. He’s much more mature now, that’s for sure.” Jolene responds. 

“Yeah, that makes a lot of sense. So is he taking care of you?” Carol asks. 

Jolene gives her a look of confusion. 

“I don’t...what do you…” she starts, but Carol helps her out. 

“I’m sorry, I mean is he making sure you have everything you need? Making sure you’re adjusting okay?” she clarifies. 

“Oh! Yeah, of course. He’s been a real help.” Jolene responds, trying to keep her sarcasm to herself. She felt like she was talking to Daryl’s Mother. Carol gives her a knowing look and Jolene squints her eyes at her apprehensively, nervous that she may have known more than she thought.

“Well, have to get going. It was great talking to you Jolene, we should do it again really soon!” Carol says as she turns to leave with her gun in a holster at her hip. 

“You too, thank you.” she responds. 

She turns and Francine and Olivia are staring at her. “What?” she asks them after a while. Francine says, “Nothing,” but Olivia says “So you and Daryl, huh?” 

“What? No! Hell no...He just chaperones me around, that’s all. He’s like a f*****g watchdog.” Jolene tells her. 

“Haha. Well, whatever. He probably needs some loosening up anyway. A girl might make him more human.” Olivia says to her, turning back to her clipboard. Jolene considers defending Daryl, but decides that it is not the time; plus, she found her perspective of Daryl to be very amusing. 

She and Francine leave the armory to head to the expansion site. As they are walking Jolene hears someone approach them from behind. She turns around and Daryl gives her that all too familiar scowl she admired. “Hey” says Jolene awkwardly, surprised to see him again this soon. Francine seems to notice the tension, “Oh hey Daryl, I was just escorting Jolene to the construction site. You need to talk to Abraham about somethin’?” She asks him. 

“Nah. Just making sure she was with the right people.” he responds, not taking his eyes off of Jolene. She looks around in uncomfortable embarrassment as he seems to burn a hole through her. She could almost read his mind: “Why didn’t you tell me you were leaving? The f**k is wrong with you?” She smiles at him with her mouth, but not her eyes. She enjoyed pushing his buttons. Finally he turns around and stalks off with his crossbow at his back. She wondered if he was ever without that thing. 

“I see what you mean about the watchdog thing.” says Francine. “Don’t see how anybody could crack that shell.” Jolene chuckles with her as they continue walking.

“So you’re from Pennsylvania, huh? I’m originally from New York.” Francine says to her. 

“City? I had a few friends who lived out there.” Jolene responds

“Actually, I lived in upper state New York. I lived in the city as a kid, but when I got married we moved to a suburban neighborhood, my Husband and me.” 

“Does your husband live here?” 

“No, he’s gone.” 

“I’m sorry to hear that.”

“Thank you. So did you have anybody? You know, before?” Francine asks.

“Yeah, I had a lot of people. My husband was the last of them.” Jolene responds. 

“Couple of widowers. I knew we had something in common.” 

“Unfortunately, I think everybody here has that in common in one way or the other.”

“Very True.” says Francine somberly. 

She and Francine get to the site and meet up with Abraham. “Ah my new recruit.” he says when he sees her. 

“I see you met Francine...she’ll be your lead on this project so anything she says, goes.” Abraham continues. Jolene nods, looking from Francine then back to Abraham with a concentrated smile. “Make sure to keep your weapon handy at all times and know it’s location in case we get too many of these dead fuckers at our backs. We work quickly, but sometimes quietly is hard to do with this material so we will likely have unwanted guests. We rotate watch duty so everybody gets the same amount of work. Use a knife before going for a gun as we need to conserve our ammunition....we take breaks every couple of hours to keep our energy and spirits. Any questions so far?” he asks her. It was clear to Jolene that he had some military training in the past. 

“No sir. I’m ready when you are.” Jolene responds sarcastically. 

“You won’t be this eager in a couple hours, cupcake. Just wait.” he says to her. 

Fucker, she thinks, while giving him a scowl of her own. She sets down the rifle nearby as Francine starts giving her instruction on her work.

The work day flies by quickly and Jolene starts to appreciate why Abraham gave her so much s**t. When they finish at sundown, around 8 o’clock, she felt like she was going to pass out, throw up or all the above. She had drank her body weight in water and still felt dehydrated. Her body was physically drained and sore as hell. Francine tried to assure her, “Don’t worry, it gets easier. The first day is usually the hardest and you haven’t had a lot to eat the last few months so your body has to adjust.” 

No s**t, she thought. Even with all the breaks and the extra food throughout the day she felt like her arms were going to fall off. Apparently it was a community lunch type situation so they had sandwiches and other snacks brought to them. Jolene was overly amused by Abraham and his sense of humor as he is so crass and blunt. He doesn’t give a s**t about what anybody else there thinks, which is the way it should be. There are 7 people on the team: Abraham became the leader after the other person in charge, Tobin, almost got the team killed. Tobin was still working, but now under Abraham, then there is Tommy, a blonde stocky muscle head type, Bruce, who looked like the poster child for blue collar construction worker, and of course, Francine. Jolene really hated how easy it was to get along with them all. Bruce and Tommy were mostly quiet when they worked, but Francine, Tobin and Abraham carried enough conversations for the entire group.

She finds out through gossip with Francine that Abraham recently dumped his girlfriend, a girl named Rosita, who she vaguely remembers at the church, for Sasha, the woman who opened the gate for her the first day. Jolene was amused to find out about a whole bunch of people that live in Alexandria. She could see how it was easy to escape with all the gossip going on in town.  Apparently, Tara’s girlfriend is Denise, who is the Doctor at the infirmary. It’s rumoured that Maggie is pregnant and her husband Glenn doesn’t know. There is another rumor that Rick is sleeping with Michonne, which enlightened Jolene as to why she was there when she first met him. Francine even mentions Daryl and how Rick’s group came to take over their community after the death of their previous Mayor, Deanna, died. Francine speaks about Daryl as an outsider which irks Jolene a bit more than she would like. A lot of the townspeople seem afraid of him, which she finds amusing. 

Apparently Rick’s group, composed of Daryl, Michonne, Carl, Maggie, Sasha, Abraham, Rosita, Eugene, Tara, Carol and a few others were the ones with the experience in the world outside of Alexandria. Jolene was starting to put the puzzle pieces together regarding everybody’s individual experience. It was clear that the townspeople were the children and Rick’s group were the parents coming to give some much needed lessons and guidance. 

On the way back they drop off the guns and any extra ammo in the armory. Jolene had completely forgotten her surroundings, but luckily the main road (the only road in town) only went one way. Francine offers to walk her home, but she declines, wanting to be alone with her thoughts and her exhaustion. She was also psychologically exhausted from all the relationship building she was being forced into the last few days. 

While she really enjoyed the people she was just out of practice with trying to be cordial and have a normal conversation. Most of the time she just wanted to say what she thought or nothing, but knew that she would likely be shunned. She told herself she would give this a shot, for Daryl, but there was only so much she could really do. f**k, she thinks, what if he is waiting for me? She didn’t know if she wanted to see him after everything. 

She didn’t know how she would react to seeing him.