In the Eyes of a Wallflower

Back to the Real World

Entry 29

              Today I get to go home. I called Mum last night to let her know what the doctors have decided, and she said she would arrange for me to get picked up. I even called Daddy, but his personal phone was shut off telling me he’s deep in his work right now. I have been focusing mainly today on packing up the last month of my life into a few bags so that I can be ready when they come in with my release forms in hand. Now that all of my packing is done, I figure it’s as good a time as any to write a little. My anxiety and excitement are both sky high right now. I am so ready to get back to school and normal daily living beyond the walls of a hospital. My anxiety is up though because I’m worried about how it will be adjusting. I guess it’s time to find out though. I just heard my name being read off a nurse’s chart so they can come collect my things. Mom’s driver must be waiting for me outside. Well, let’s get this over with.

- - - - - - -

Casey POV

              The drive home is quiet. Mum’s driver isn’t a man of many words or emotions. At least, that’s how he portrays himself to the world. I have seen the way he looks at Mum though. I know she is incredibly happy with her life and would never jeopardize her relationship with Daddy. They are so in love it’s crazy. But that doesn’t mean Gerald, the driver, doesn’t envy Daddy. I can tell that he has a thing for Mum, but he does well at being professional at least.

              Pulling up to the house my heart skips a beat thinking about getting back to my own space. I don’t see any other cars, but they could be in the garage. It’s about lunch time now so hopefully Mum and Daddy are here. I go rushing into the house as soon as my car door opens, not even worrying about my belongings, other than my journal that is clutched tightly to my chest. “Mummy! Daddy! I’m finally home!” I yell as I walk past the foyer and into the kitchen. The cook, Mrs. Lucy, is making what smells like a cheesy lobster mac for lunch, and my mouth instantly starts watering at the scent. “Hey Mrs. Lucy, where are Mum and Dad?” I ask.

              “Your father is at the office working on a case that may have him travelling out of state for a few weeks. Mrs. Chamille is at a fashion event in Rome. They left Anna and I strict instructions on how to help you adjust back into a daily routine and get you back to school. Are you hungry?” she changed the subject turning her attention back to the oven. With a shrug I reply “a little. I’m going to run up to my room and shower before lunch though. How much longer until it’s ready, Mrs. Lucy?”. She smiled, “you have about fifteen minutes. Do you need any help from Anna? With your belongings or your shower?” I shook my head, “No that’s ok. I think I can manage. Thanks.” And I turned back to the foyer to grab my bags before heading up the stairs to my room.

              The stairs were more difficult to manage than I had figured they would be. Carrying my bags had me a bit off balance so by the time I reached my room I was limping from the uneven weight distribution on my legs. Walking into my bedroom the first thing I did was empty my bag onto the bed and dig through to get my painkillers. I have about ten more minutes left to shower and change before lunch is finished. Rushing into the bathroom I undress and hop into the shower which I crank up on the highest heat I can manage against my skin. Thankfully, I have a seat built into my shower because my legs are shaking from going up the stairs. Sitting down under the scalding spray of the shower I can’t help but feel a few hot tears staining my cheeks.

I know that I’ve never really been top priority in my parents’ world, but you would think that they would be here to greet their child after she had been in the hospital for four freaking months. I can’t say these tears are from sorrow, though. Maybe more so of frustration for even letting me get my hopes up a little. Scrubbing roughly at my face, I gain my composure and take to washing my hair and body with my favorite lavender soaps. The aroma helps calm my nerves, and after just allowing the hot water to pour over my sore muscles for a while, I figure it’s time to get dressed and go back downstairs.

The walk downstairs is even more brutal as the impact of each step jars into my hips. After about six steps I decide I would rather take my chances sliding down the railing. It goes rather well until I get almost to the bottom right as Anna rounds the stairs to come get me. Before I can even say something, I have plummeted off the railing and landed on top of Anna. Waiting for her to be upset I squint my eyes ready to be scolded. “Oh, my Goodness! Casey! Are you ok dear? You could have been seriously hurt! Thank the Lord I was here to catch you, even if we did both end up on the ground…” she trailed off with a chuckle. Anna is probably in her early twenties and works for Lucy. Anna helps with cooking and cleaning and she seems to be genuinely nice. Much less a formal personality to Mrs. Lucy.

“I’m fine Anna. I’m sorry I knocked you down.” I mumbled. “Oh, nonsense dear, you were just having fun, and I’m sure it hurt less to ride the rail than it did to tromp down the stairs anyway.” She said with a wink. “Let’s go get you settled in for lunch.” And with that she grabs my hand leading me toward the dining room.

- - - - -

              Entry 30

Being home is nice. Tomorrow I get to go right back into school. I have already missed out on three months of my freshman year, so I am ready to see how the high school looks. Being midway through the week this week I am a bit worried I may get confused. It will be fine though. I’m sure a can manage. I wonder how many people will even notice me being back. How many even noticed I was even gone? I don’t know but I guess we will find out in the morning.

After lunch, I spent the rest of my day rearranging and organizing my room to the best of my abilities and then have spent the rest of my time just enjoying my soft bed and its furry comforters. I didn’t even realize how uncomfortable the hospital bed really was until laying in my own bed again. This is heavenly. Off to bed. Tomorrow is a new day.

- - - - - - -

Casey POV

WAH WAH WAH WAH WAH WAH WAH

              The sound of my alarm going of is the most annoying noise in the world. As I roll over to silence it, I am hit with sunlight. Anna opened the curtains right as I opened my eyes temporarily blinding me.

“uuughhh, I don’t want to get uuuup.” I groaned. Next thing I know I feel a pillow colliding with my face. “Get up sleepy head! Time for school!” Anna cooed in a sing-song voice. How is she so chipper at 7am? Rolling over I grab the pillow she threw at me and snuggle into it. The bliss of comfort is short lived, however, as Anna snatches my blanket and rips it from my body. “Ugh! Fine. I’m up!” I shout, surprising us both. “Sorry, I’ll go grab my uniform,” I mumble hiding behind my hair as I head for my closet.

              Grabbing my uniform, I enjoy the fact that I can blend in easily. Our uniforms are just like any other prep school. Simple white button downs and black jackets and a tie. The boys get to wear pants and us girls have to wear skirts. Luckily for me they don’t mind me wearing leggings underneath since I really don’t prefer wearing a skirt. In my closet I grab a pair of black leggings with my uniform essentials and head into my bathroom for a quick shower. After my shower I brush my teeth and get dressed so I can get downstairs for breakfast.

              As I walk down the stairs, tenderly stepping and taking my time so that I don’t end up hurting too badly, I see Anna waiting at the bottom for me. “Well, it seems someone has learned her lesson since yesterday’s encounter.” She smiled up at me. “Yea, I figured with as much walking as I will be doing at school today, I should probably take it easy this morning.” I replied, heading past her and into towards the kitchen. “Good morning, Dear, did you sleep well?” Lucy asked and I just shrugged my shoulders while loading up my plate. “hmmm” she hummed, “Well it looks to me like somebody could use a pick me up.” Lucy then pulled a small, wrapped gift from behind her back.

               In shock, it took me a minute to register she was offering the gift to me. But with a quick recovery I got excited and immediately started ripping through the paper to find a calligraphy pen and ink well. it was absolutely gorgeous with a cherry wood handle. “I noticed you brought a journal home from the hospital, I thought maybe this would be nice to use with it.” she said softly, and I couldn’t contain my emotions as I grabbed her for a hug. “Thank you so much Lucy! It’s beautiful! You have no idea how much this means to me.” I said half sobbing into the shoulder of her blouse. “That’s alright dear. I’m glad you like it. Now finish eating. You don’t want to be late for your first day back, now do you?” she smiled and walked back into the kitchen. Noticing the time, I quickly scarfed down my food and headed to the door. Usually, I would walk to and from school when the weather is nice, but Anna told me that Dad has scheduled for a car and driver for the first week or so. This way I won’t be overdoing it. It’s moments like this that I remind myself, even if he isn’t physically here all the time and even if he weren’t here to greet me coming home, he does still care. It’s the little things that count.