Lost

THREE

My mother knocked on the door as I tried to even out my breath. I don’t want to answer her questions or talk to her but I don’t think I can escape. I splash water on my face to calm myself and try to breathe easy.

“What happened? Naila? Why did you leave? Say something? Open the door.”

After a while, I open my door and see my mother standing screening me to make some assumption. “Were you vomiting? Are you pregnant?”

“No. I am not feeling well but I know I am definitely not pregnant.”

“I am your mother, you can share with me. I don’t want you to run away or elope with some i***t. If anyone knows about this situation, they might make absurd assumptions.”

This woman! I feel like I live in the 19th century. Mother afraid of her daughter’s relations and social status more than her actual well being. I want to scream at her face but I don’t want to fall for that again. Last time I spoke little loudly, she lashed out and complained to my aunt, father and cousin.

“I am okay. I ate sushi and I feel like they were stale.”

“Why did you eat outside? How many times have I told you not to. Also, you need to work on yourself. You are already so short, you need to stay in shape.” and then she starts fuelling my body insecurities. Good thing is I can feel my symptoms fading and that gives me more control over my body. Also, a good distraction from that subject.

It was eight o’clock. My mother was out with her friends and my father was working in his room. I think she will be back late. After contemplating a lot, I decided to tell my father about my decision. I am scared but I need to before my mother says something more. I slowly walked near his room and knocked. I peek inside to see him watching a movie. He loves Tomorrow Never Dies ( 1997). Honestly, he likes all James Bond movies, especially one starring Pierce Brosnan. That means he is in a good mood. I sat beside him and watched the movie.

“Dad, remember you asked me to apply and work in your organisation?”

“Yes, are you here to talk about that?”

I muster up my courage as I say, “I want to work in a media house where I can do creative writing as well. I like your offer but I don’t think it’s good for me.” I gulp as I speak further, ” I discussed this with Poppy. She also advised me to work on digital platforms like Buzz-speed, etc.”

After a moment of silence he speaks ,” Naila, at the end of the day I want the best for you. Your grandfather was a Physicist. I can understand that sometimes I lay my expectations on you. To be honest, I knew that you wouldn’t like my offer but I wanted you to speak up for yourself. Some days your life choice scares me. But then, I don’t know many people who are in that field.”

“I understand, thank you.”

“And Naila, start speaking up for yourself. I am disappointed that you are scared of me, of your own father. I ask difficult questions because as a Lawyer, I can read people well. Your lack of self esteem and confidence often makes me question your future. You can do whatever you like but if you need any help, don’t hesitate to ask.”

“Yes. I will keep that in mind.”

I leave the room with a little relaxed shoulder and smile. That was easier than I expected. My father is a man of few words and he only speaks if he feels is necessary. I knew he wouldn’t force me to join his work place. I reach my room and open my laptop. I start searching for internships and I find one. It’s a start-up company with it’s YouTube channel. They need some to write scripts for their videos. I think I can do that. I have written scripts for skits in my college and videos are more or less similar to skit. Although they mention me to move to a different location. Honestly, I am okay with that as it’s the same city where Aunt Nelly lives. I apply for it and send my sample works for review. I start applying for similar internships and start noticing the job criteria for most of these companies. I made a mental note to enrol in a digital marketing class to improve my chances.

I get a notification from them after an hour. It reads :

Ms Naila Issa, You have been shortlisted for the next round of this job opening. We have a YouTube channel and we want the content in the videos to be converted into writing so that we can publish it on our website. We want you to see the video and then write 300 words content based on the video. The grammar and creativity should be on point. We will go through the samples of the writing and will select the appropriate candidates.

Under that message, I see a video link and I start working on that. After an hour, I am done with the script and decide to edit to make it sound more captivating. Satisfied with results, I proofread and edit my work. Upon completion, I sent them my assignment and went down to eat dinner.

I noticed my mother was back and she retired to her room. I know that after tonight, she will ask me about two things : my sushi-incident and my conversation with dad. I really hope that I get any internship before she showers me with her pros and cons. Also, I know which side is pro and which one is cons. After eating, I walked back to my room and listened to some music. Sleep came to me easy. But tomorrow won’t be as peaceful and I have to fight a long way before I actually join a company.