The Pilates Class

CHAPTER 4

CHAPTER 4

“HOW’S THAT FOR you Mrs Lambert?”

Julian Swann held the mirror at the back of the old lady’s head. He had tried his best, but every week she still seemed to resemble a rather large cauliflower.

“Lovely thanks, Julian. I’ll make another appointment for a fortnight.”

Julian massaged his shoulder and winced. Holding the hairdryer was becoming more and more of a problem, and he couldn’t seem to lift his left arm up as high as he used to. His back ached from standing up all day. Grey hairs were beginning to appear. What was happening to his body? He was only 42! He thought back to the conversation he’d had with his partner that very morning. It was fine for Malcolm to take the piss; he was only 28 and all his body parts were working as they should. However, Julian knew the score – there could be no ageing in the gay world! What was he going to do, now that his body was no longer young?

“What’s it going to be today then Mrs Cooper?”

“I don’t know. What do you think?”

Julian looked at the tired, lank, over-bleached rats’ tails in front of him, and thought maybe a good going over with the clippers set at 0.5 would be the best solution.

“Let’s have a little trim, some hot oil conditioner and a blow dry. What do you say?”

“Sounds lovely. You always do a good job, Julian. I love your new hair colour by the way.”

“Oh, thank you! I’ve been feeling a little bit sad these past few days, so blue is definitely the right colour at the moment.”

“Nothing too serious I hope?”

“Just a painful back and shoulder. Nothing that turning back the clock by 20 years wouldn’t put right.”

“Ha! If only! When I had a frozen shoulder I went to some classes where they taught you how to stretch properly. Perhaps go along and see if there’s anything suitable in the leisure centre?”

“Thanks. I might just do that.”

“You’re out of condition. You even drive to the salon. You could walk it in fifteen minutes.” Malcolm gripped his right foot and pressed the heel of his trainer into his right buttock. “Come out running with me. You’ll soon feel the benefit.”

“It’d kill me.” Julian watched as Malcolm switched to stretching his left quadriceps. He resembled a Greek God, standing there in his purple running shorts and vest: “There’s no way I could get my foot right up there anyway.”

“I’ll come to the gym with you if you want? Anything you want to do. You can get fit slowly. We can work out together.”

“You’d do that for me?”

“Only if I can have a free haircut at the salon.”

“It’s a deal. You’re in need of a cut and colour anyway.”

“Just don’t do it pink like the last time. The grunters at the gym were pissing themselves.”