Falling Rain

9

    Mason has been acting out of sorts the last few days, he’s been spending a lot of time in his office. He had made arrangements for me to start physical therapy and hasn’t really come to check in on me the last few days. He comes by once in the morning and once in the evening, he doesn't even sleep in the bedroom anymore. I worry I did something to upset him, I plan on confronting him today about it. 

“You need to focus, or you will lose balance” Parker, my physical therapist tells me. He has had me practicing standing and sitting all morning, using a walker in front of me to hold onto. I have to admit I am getting tired, my legs are aching from the muscles being worked. 

“I think I need to rest..” I say as I plop back down onto the bed. 

He moves the walker to the wall and starts to stretch out my legs with me. 

“You did good today, your focus wasn’t three though.. You need to have your full attention on it or you won’t get better. You have to give it your all” He scolds me 

“I know.. I’m sorry. My mind is elsewhere today.. I’m worried about Mason” I sigh

“King Alpha is not your concern when you are having your sessions. Clear your mind of all outside distractions” 

King Alpha? Why would he call him that? 

“King Alpha?” I repeat questioningly. Parker looks uncomfortable suddenly as if he said something wrong. 

“It’s nothing. Please forget I said anything. I need to go.. I’ll see you tomorrow Luna” He turns and practically runs from the room. I sigh and look around for my wheelchair, it’s about six feet away.

     I swallow a wad of saliva pooling in the back of my throat and set to my task. Get to my wheelchair so I can go find Mason. I slowly lower my body off the bed and onto the floor, forcing myself to crawl across the floor. I grab onto the chair and slowly hoist myself up. It takes a few tries as my upper body strength is not up to par yet and my arms are tired from therapy. Once I am in the chair, huffing and puffing I roll myself into the hallway. 

    I know Mason’s office is on the second floor, I am currently on the fourth, I have to use the chair lift. I hold my breath as it starts moving, pulling me down the stairs. I quickly get off it and make my way down the hallway, it is strangely quiet in the house. I see a few people walking around but they don’t seem to notice me at all. They all seem so busy working on something but the silence is deafening to me. 

After what feels like an eternity I am finally at the end of the hallway, Mason’s office. I wrap my knuckles on the door quickly. 

“I told you I am not to be disturbed!” I hear Mason call out, his voice is irritated. 

“Mason?” I call, my voice shaking. I’ve never heard him so angry before. 

There is silence for a moment before the door opens, his face goes from angry to regretful in an instant. 

“I’m sorry I didn’t realize it was you.. Please come in” He says with a half smile. He pushes my chair next to his desk and sits down in a big computer chair, rolling it towards me. 

“What brings you down here my dear? How did you get here anyways? I thought you were doing therapy?” He glances at his watch. 

“Oh umm.. I needed to talk to you, and Parker ran out on me a little while ago. I think I made him uncomfortable, but I’m not sure” 

“Oh, I see.. What did you want to talk about?” 

“Why have you been so distant lately?” I blurt out, getting straight to the point of my visit. 

“Oh.. I am sorry.. I have had a lot to do these last few days. There is a very important ceremony I have been planning for us. It is the Alpha and Luna ceremony.. I didn’t want to burden you with planning so I figured I’d deal with it myself. It’s only a week away now, the next full moon.. There is a lot to be done still” He says, pushing his hand through his tousled hair. 

“You could have told me about it.. I want to help if I can” 

“Honestly… I’ve been wondering if it’s even right for me to be the new Alpha.. I mean there are many who doubt me and my abilities, I wonder some days if it would not be easier to just run away. Have my father continue to rule until my brothers become of age. Why does it have to fall on me?” 

He looks so conflicted. 

“Because he knows you will be a great Alpha. You’re people follow you into battle without hesitation, I think they would die for you. Mason, you have to know deep down that you are the right one for this job.. Striker knows I can promise you that.. There is no question about it for him. He knows exactly where he belongs, why are you so afraid of taking your place?” 

“Because if I do it means you will be in danger. The last thing I want is to put you in any danger Rain” He whispers, his hands shaking like a leaf. 

He’s so concerned about me and my safety. 

“Did you think it may be more dangerous to reject the title? Also, why are you called King Alpha?” I ask, making him snap his eyes at me. 

“Where did you hear that?” He eyes me very closely, making me feel slightly uncomfortable. 

“Well… Parker called you King Alpha earlier and I was curious about it”

Anger sweeps across his face for a moment before I reach out and take hold of his hand. 

“He was not supposed to address me as such, no one is. I ordered it the day I took over the Alpha title. I do not want the title of King Alpha, it is not an honor I deserve. My Father was King, I am not half the man he is. Being King of all the packs is not something to be taken lightly. It is a dangerous and ruthless job, one which I do not want.” 

“But it is your birthright..” I try to reason with him. 

    His fist slams onto the desk, splitting the wood, I flinch backwards into my chair, making me roll back a few inches. He looks at me with regret and sadness. 

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you” He sighs and collapses into the chair. 

“I would like to go back to my room” I whisper, my voice catching in my throat. 

He slowly gets up and walks around to my chair, he pushes me from the room and back to the stairs. 

“I can get it from here” I tell him. He nods sadly and backs off.  I roll myself back to my bedroom and get myself back into bed, pulling the covers over me and engulfing myself in darkness. 

    He’s gotten mad at me before that moment. There was a tiny part of me that was afraid he was going to hit me. That part took over my entire body in that moment, as much as I didn’t want it to. I couldn’t help it, it just happened. I feel ashamed that I even had the thought. I feel deep down that Mason will never ever hurt me and yet my whole body froze and recoiled away from him. It was like I was back in the cell and he was beating me within an inch of my life once more. 

I feel tears sliding down my face and I let them fall. I cry until I have nothing left inside me and I fall asleep. 

“Rain..” I hear Mason’s voice clearly, even though my eyes are still closed I can tell he is here with me. I shift in the bed, towards his voice. He pulls the blanket back and pulls me into his arms. He is warm and soft. I snuggle into him before even realizing what I’m doing. 

“Rain, I’m so sorry” He whispers, his voice strained. 

I open my eyes and look at him, his are bloodshot, like he’s been crying. I raise my hand and cup his face, pulling him down. Our foreheads touch and I feel all of my fears and sorrows seem to fade away at his touch. I feel like he can feel it too because he lets out a long breath. 

“I love you..” I whisper, not sure if he heard it or not. He doesn’t move for a moment. The next thing I know I am on my back. Mason hovers on top of me, his breathing is staggered and rough. His lips come crashing down on mine and he feels needy and aggressive. 

I pull my head to the side and try to speak, but my voice is caught in my chest. He starts to trail kisses down my neck, onto my chest. 

“Mason… Stop…” I moan. 

I don’t want it like this.

He pulls back and looks at me with such heartbreak. 

“I’m not ready.. Not yet… Maybe you can just hold me for tonight?” I ask, hopeful he won’t be upset. 

“Of course. I’m sorry if I pressured you” He pulls himself off me, he doesn't seem upset not with me at least.

He pulls me into his arms and pulls up a blanket to over us and holds me until I fall asleep. I listen to his even heartbeat until sleep takes it's sweet hold onto me.