Chapter Seven: Why Now
1283 Words
Celyne POV
Once again the feelings I tried to let go clawed again unto the surface, but it did nothing to calm the storm raging inside me. Every step I took toward the consultation room felt like walking through a fog of my past—pain, regret, and memories I thought I had buried.
Alexander was already there, standing like he always did—controlled, perfect, and terrifyingly unreadable. His eyes tracked my every movement as I closed the door behind me.
“Celyne,” he said, his voice low but sharp. “What exactly were you thinking? do you think is funny, is my child you are carrying and I will like it, if you treat the baby with care.
I swallowed hard, trying to steady the trembling in my hands. The words lodged in my chest, heavy as stone. I wanted to scream, to tell him , should my body not be treated with care.
“I… I didn’t know what else to do,” I whispered, my voice breaking despite my best effort to stay strong. “I… I thought… maybe it would feel like… like I still had some control over my life.”
“Control?” he repeated, incredulous. “Celyne, this isn’t control. This is… reckless. You’re putting yourself at risk—your health,my child, everything.”
I pressed my hand to my stomach, feeling the faint stir of life inside me. The tiny presence reminded me that I had already crossed a line I couldn’t uncross. My body had agreed to carry a life, and now, no amount of regret could undo that.
“I know,” I said quietly, almost to myself. “I… I know it was risky. I’m… I’m scared too.”
He stepped closer, eyes narrowing. “Scared? You’re terrified, and you should be. But why now, Celyne? After all these years, after everything we’ve been through, why now?”
The words cut deeper than I expected. Memories I had tried to lock away—our marriage, the miscarriages, the heartbreak, the betrayal—washed over me like a flood. And now, here I was, standing in the same room as the man who had haunted my dreams, forced to carry his child under someone else’s name.
“Why now?” I echoed, my voice hollow. “Why now? Life… life has never been fair to me, Alexander. It never has.”
He didn’t answer immediately. He just studied me, his expression unreadable. I could feel the weight of his gaze pressing against me, reminding me of everything I had tried to escape.
And now, I’m doing this… this surrogacy. For you… and her.” I couldn’t say her name, not yet. The word felt like poison on my tongue. “I didn’t want this. I… I don’t know if I can do this.”
Alexander’s jaw tightened. “Celyne, you signed a contract. You agreed to this. You knew the risks, legally and medically.”
I closed my eyes, letting the tension roll through me. Breaking the contract seemed like the only way out, the only chance I had to reclaim some fragment of myself. But even thinking about it made my heart pound. The legal ramifications, the hospital requirements, the consequences for the baby—all of it pressed down on me like a weight I couldn’t lift.
“And if I break it?” I asked finally, my voice barely above a whisper. “If I stop this… what happens then?”
Alexander’s eyes softened just slightly, but it wasn’t kindness. It was the kind of look that told me he was thinking two steps ahead. “You know the answer, Celyne. You’ve seen contracts before. You’ve studied the clauses. You know there will be consequences. You know you can’t just… walk away like that with my child”
I pressed my hand harder to my stomach, as if the tiny life inside me could give me guidance. “Then what am I supposed to do? Keep going? Keep living like this?” My voice cracked. “Every step forward feels like stepping into a trap. Every day I try to escape, the more I’m drawn into it. I… I can’t… not again, Alexander. Not this. Not after everything.”
His silence was sharp, almost painful. He didn’t move, didn’t try to soften my words. He let them hang between us, like jagged pieces of glass.
“Celyne…” he said finally, voice quieter, almost… tired. “You don’t have a choice, the deed has been done, you are a surrogate and that’s it”
What we had is over and ended
The words made my stomach twist. Tired. Like he understood, like he remembered all the losses, all the pain, all the moments we thought we would survive together but didn’t.
“I never asked for this,” I whispered. “I didn’t sign up for this. I didn’t sign up to carry… to carry for you… for her. I didn’t sign up to relive everything that hurt me. I… I didn’t ask for any of this.”
He took a step closer, so close I could feel the air shift between us. “Life isn’t fair, Celyne. That’s… always been the way.” You either leave with it or find a way out
The words hit harder than anything else. Life wasn’t fair. I already knew that. But hearing it from him—Alexander—made it feel personal, a sentence handed down just to test me.
“I can’t do this,” I said finally, my voice breaking under the weight of everything. “I don’t know if I can. I don’t… I can’t—”
He reached out, stopping me mid-step with a hand against my arm. His touch wasn’t gentle, but it wasn’t violent either. It was a grounding force in the storm I couldn’t navigate.
“You don’t have a choice,” he said simply. “Not really. Not if you want to keep yourself… and not if you want to keep this child safe.”
I wanted to argue. I wanted to scream that it wasn’t fair, that none of this should be happening to me. But the truth settled in like a heavy stone: he was right. I couldn’t escape this. Not now, not ever.
I looked down at my stomach, my fingers brushing lightly over the life inside me. The tiny presence, innocent and unaware, was the tether I couldn’t break.
“I… I’ll stay,” I whispered, more to myself than to him.
Alexander didn’t smile. He didn’t nod. He just stood there, watching me like he was calculating every possible outcome, every risk, every choice I would make.
And in that moment, I realized something terrifying.
No matter how much I tried to control this, no matter how much I wanted to walk away, no matter how much I hated him and myself… the past wasn’t done with me.
And the present? It was far worse.
Because now, not only was I fighting cancer, not only was I carrying a child for the man I once loved, but I was trapped in a contract that would decide all our futures.
And the more I thought about it, the more I realized…
There was no escaping this.
Not now.
Not ever.
A soft knock at the door made me jump. Alexander didn’t move. The handle turned slowly, and I froze.
The doctor stepped inside, face pale, eyes wide.
“You need to see this,” he said, holding a folder that I immediately recognized.
My heart stopped.
Because whatever was inside that folder… would change everything.
Don’t change anything
- Writer
